need to distance myself?

[jjd]

My best friend is getting married in a couple of months. The guy she's marrying is also one of my closer friends, and a few years ago we actually dated for a brief time. I am just unsure as to how much I should hang out with them...obviously they need space but is it weird for me to still do stuff with them? This is just so weird for me because my best friend and I were always inseparable. Should I tell them to let me know if they want me to leave them alone? We have a ton of fun together...we all go to the same church and I usually go over to their house on friday nights. My dad said I should not even be friends with them anymore...??? (My dad isn't know for giving the most normal advice.) Can any of you help me? I'd feel horrible being the friend that doesn't know when to leave.

 

[Shad6374]

Absolutely you should still be friends with them but also know there will be times when they just want to be alone especially in the first few weeks and months of their marriage.

I think a good idea would be after things have settled to sit down and talk to them about your feelings because how are they going to know otherwise??

 

[FearAintFaith]

I think if I were you I would cut back the time spent with them at first so they can have some newly married space. But also talk to them about it. I dont believe in folks not talking to each other about stuff. Just flat out tell them you enjoy hanging out with them and dont want to loose your closeness even though they are getting married. Also tell them you totally understand that they need some newly wed time. I am sure they will be happy that you consider their feelings so much.

 

[Gardener101]

So sorry to hear what you are going through.


It is at times like this where I wish it was okay for Christians to do what King David and Abraham did.... hang out with wifey and the bit on the side


Sorry

 

[Gardener101]

My best friend is getting married in a couple of months. The guy she's marrying is also one of my closer friends, and a few years ago we actually dated for a brief time. I am just unsure as to how much I should hang out with them...obviously they need space but is it weird for me to still do stuff with them? This is just so weird for me because my best friend and I were always inseparable. Should I tell them to let me know if they want me to leave them alone? We have a ton of fun together...we all go to the same church and I usually go over to their house on friday nights. My dad said I should not even be friends with them anymore...??? (My dad isn't know for giving the most normal advice.) Can any of you help me? I'd feel horrible being the friend that doesn't know when to leave.

That said, some Muslims are to be envied, cus in this situation, the guy would simply marry both of you and continue with this happy situation of three people who get on so well and have fun together.

 

[tryingtobeagain]

Talk to them for sure... maybe even just your best friend so that she knows she can be honest and ask for space when necessary. It shows them that you care about them and are considerate of their feeligns!

 

[Luther073082]

My best friend is getting married in a couple of months. The guy she's marrying is also one of my closer friends, and a few years ago we actually dated for a brief time. I am just unsure as to how much I should hang out with them...obviously they need space but is it weird for me to still do stuff with them? This is just so weird for me because my best friend and I were always inseparable. Should I tell them to let me know if they want me to leave them alone? We have a ton of fun together...we all go to the same church and I usually go over to their house on friday nights. My dad said I should not even be friends with them anymore...??? (My dad isn't know for giving the most normal advice.) Can any of you help me? I'd feel horrible being the friend that doesn't know when to leave.

If you don't have feelings for him, and they are both comfortable with it then I don't think there is any problem.