Need Help

[JeremiahEzekiel]

I'm a 17 year old Christian male. For a few years I've been having disturbing thoughts about other boys and men. I've prayed and prayed to Jesus for help, but I still find myself with the same evil desires. Yesterday, in a moment of weakness, I engaged in intercourse with my 56 year old male sunday school teacher. I feel so guilty and sick to my stomach now. But the weird thing is, when it was happening, it felt good. Praying is not working anymore. The only one I could talk to was my sunday school teacher and that's not really an option anymore. I don't feel that anyone in my family or church will understand. The crazy thing is, I find myself imaging doing it again. I don't want to, but some part of me really does. What should I do? What would Jesus do?

 

[James 1:27]

Remember you are never to far from God to come back to him. He is always waiting for your return.

My advice is to quickly find a CHRISTIAN counselor to help you deal with your feelings and desires in a godly way. He will help get you on the right track.

Also find a godly man that you trust to open up to. Someone other than your Sunday school teacher. Steer clear of him, he is not looking out for your best interests. He needs to be reported to protect other boys, he may be engaging in this behavior with younger students.

I pray God will give you courage and boldness to do what's right. And that he will direct your path to one of righteousness.

I'll be praying for you.

 

[JeremiahEzekiel]

I appreciate your advice. But I really don't feel that there's anybody I can talk to about this. The worst part is this whole experience has made my desires even more inflamed. All I can think about now is having sex with other men. I look around at my classmates at school, in the locker room, during gym class, and I imagine myself succumbing to my passions. These thoughts won't go away. Maybe I should accept myself how I am. Maybe I am gay. Maybe there's nothing I, or anybody else can do about it. Maybe I am this way because God made me this way. Maybe Jesus would be happy for me to find my way in this world. Sorry to ramble, but I'm very confused. I don't know. I'm sorry.

 

[Stephen Kendall]

I'm a 17 year old Christian male. For a few years I've been having disturbing thoughts about other boys and men. I've prayed and prayed to Jesus for help, but I still find myself with the same evil desires. Yesterday, in a moment of weakness, I engaged in intercourse with my 56 year old male sunday school teacher. I feel so guilty and sick to my stomach now. But the weird thing is, when it was happening, it felt good. Praying is not working anymore. The only one I could talk to was my sunday school teacher and that's not really an option anymore. I don't feel that anyone in my family or church will understand. The crazy thing is, I find myself imaging doing it again. I don't want to, but some part of me really does. What should I do? What would Jesus do?

A few thoughts will become many thoughts. A lack of control of just one thought will grow into a nest of roots towards completion of whatever that thought was. The only real way to stop this is to stop the bud (the little thought). You need help. Sharing with others is a way of letting confessions do their job, nipping the buds off. Confessions are a brazen tool to destroy the little thoughts that you still have enough conscience left in you to recognize them as bad (evil). First, you need to fall upon your face to God and confess to him, your sin, your weakness and your need of him. Then confess to your love ones and trusted church leaders. This will kill that thought that you believe that you enjoy. Confessions are nails in the coffin of your secret sin. Attack now. Your sin will be halted and you will be freed of it. Now, the starting question is how far will you allow this to go before you take this necessary action? Will you let other thoughts become enjoyable that you know are wrong? They will come. All of sin is one, as is all of love & righteousness is one. They will invite themselves right into your soul, as you learn to enjoy them each, crossing each barrier with just a little thought. This road promises troubles galore, until death may be welcomed. Please attack your secret or hidden thoughts, expose them and escape them.

All Christians have to confess their sins. Don't be surprised that this radical method has to be employed. Believe me, it is best to do this at 17 then to go through hell and do it at your lowest low & near death at 30. It is Jesus that commanded us to confess our sins. To have confessions is to not allow these cunning little demons to start taking over your heart & mind. You really do have the upper hand now. Take charge, if you believe that your thoughts are wrong and that you trust in God & Jesus Christ. God will be with you when you step into the light with confessions. It is the right thing to do.

May God be with you to guide you.

 

[Stephen Kendall]

Please don't believe what is politically right is God right as well, it isn't. Be true as a Christian or don't be a Christian at all!

I love you man and wish that you do indeed become a man, a Christian man. Things look so much better on this side of life than on the one that you are in now. You are innocent, if indeed you have the courage to confess and follow Jesus Christ alone. We all have to put our attacking demons to bay. Even Jesus had to deal with Satan at a time of his weakest (40 days in the desert). Jesus promises to always be with us and this is 100% true.

 

[Stephen Kendall]

I appreciate your advice. But I really don't feel that there's anybody I can talk to about this. The worst part is this whole experience has made my desires even more inflamed. All I can think about now is having sex with other men. I look around at my classmates at school, in the locker room, during gym class, and I imagine myself succumbing to my passions. These thoughts won't go away. Maybe I should accept myself how I am. Maybe I am gay. Maybe there's nothing I, or anybody else can do about it. Maybe I am this way because God made me this way. Maybe Jesus would be happy for me to find my way in this world. Sorry to ramble, but I'm very confused. I don't know. I'm sorry.

Dear JeremiahEzekiel,

Please do take my advice. It isn't meant to condemn you. It is just to shed light on what is happening in you. You must take a stand with God & Jesus or step aside away from them. Don't step aside from them though. Have the courage to confess everything now. I had a couple of wonderful Christian sisters to help me, as well as several good friends. You would be surprised at how well people respond to help you and encourage you. Don't go to questionable or weak friends, they are most likely to harm you. You would be doing the right thing to confess yourself to others. It shows that you are asking God to help you and obeying the command to confess. Dark hidden desires can not live in a person who obeys Jesus Christ of confessing to others. These demonic desires and pleasures can not grow in the light of confession, as long as you always confess. The light of confession allows this light and truth to bring you away from your developing habits. You can escape this, but you could also drag it on or fail trying to fight it yourself. You are fighting spirits of evil, trying to live within you. You must join God, by following Christ. You need help by the side of Good to fight enemy of evil. Why you? Why me? We have a path of remedy, the answers to the whys will come in time, but let us help each other. Christianity is about unity of followers of Christ. Joining together in honesty by confessions, we are so strong that the harboring evil spirits leave, even ones of our uncontrollable habits. Confessions are the spiritual bleaching to remove evil in habit, desires and its entire nature in or over us. It works. There is no greater man than the one who chooses confessions over hiding the truth. It emboldens us through a humility and union with others to resist evil and unite with God & Christ.

Confessions are not a cure-all but it is a cleansing bleach and necessary for all Christians. It helps us by getting our act together and obeying Jesus. You are accepted by our Father in Heaven by confessions and asking him for help. Love you man.

PS: If you have trouble finding someone to confess to. Ask God to show you the right people. Even if you were to confess to the wrong people, as I did in one of my confessions, you are still obeying the commands of Jesus Christ, he will protect you and be with you, as he did protect me and was with me. Obeying Jesus is what he asks of us. He will be with you if you do so. Self worth and dignity comes to those who humble themselves to obey Jesus Christ and trust him alone. You can do this and Jesus will be with you.