My worst enemy is boredom/advice

[Handy Andy]

So, I have a job and some close friends, but on my days off I can only find so many things to do before I get very bored, which is when I start to think about and sometimes engage in sexual sin.

I'm wondering how do most Christians stave off boredom which causes us to sin?

I'm sure if I had a girlfriend it would be ten times easier but, that's the other part, I kinda blew it.

this girl from work asked for my number back in August and she was perfect, very attractive, very kind, a Christian, didn't want kids which is rare and something I need in a partner, etc etc.

long story short I ended up talking about her on facebook and thanks to my friends they turned the conversation sexual, although I jokingly agreed with them about the things they were saying.

She of course saw it and then ended up dating my coworker instead, but to this day I can't stop thinking about her and the mistake I made, they've since broken up and I very badly want to talk to her, but I feel she doesn't have feelings for me anymore, I've prayed about it but get no answer. My pastor essentially said to let it go but, I don't know if I can.

So any advice on those two things would be much appreciated.

Thank you

 

[QuikSand]

So, I have a job and some close friends, but on my days off I can only find so many things to do before I get very bored, which is when I start to think about and sometimes engage in sexual sin.

I'm wondering how do most Christians stave off boredom which causes us to sin?

I'm sure if I had a girlfriend it would be ten times easier but, that's the other part, I kinda blew it.

this girl from work asked for my number back in August and she was perfect, very attractive, very kind, a Christian, didn't want kids which is rare and something I need in a partner, etc etc.

long story short I ended up talking about her on facebook and thanks to my friends they turned the conversation sexual, although I jokingly agreed with them about the things they were saying.

She of course saw it and then ended up dating my coworker instead, but to this day I can't stop thinking about her and the mistake I made, they've since broken up and I very badly want to talk to her, but I feel she doesn't have feelings for me anymore, I've prayed about it but get no answer. My pastor essentially said to let it go but, I don't know if I can.

So any advice on those two things would be much appreciated.

Thank you

Don't make the same mistake again.
And where there is a will there is a way.

 

[QuikSand]

Oh and every time you are tempted to do the same thing again...remember back this day how you felt. And what it did to you.

 

[St_Worm2]

Hi Handy Andy, getting busy helping others with their physical, emotional and spiritual needs, especially directly, as part of a Christian ministry (or ministries), is a great way to stave off boredom. Such a ministry builds within us the desire to know Christ better, both to be more like Him personally, and in the help of others coming to know Him like we do. IOW, when working in and for Christ, ALL are blessed

Look to your church for help with this as well, as we are called to minister to one another via the use of the gifts the Lord has blessed us with .. see 1 Corinthians 12.

Yours in Christ,
David

Isaiah 43
10 “You are My witnesses,” declares the LORD,
“And My servant whom I have chosen,
In order that you may know and believe Me
And understand that I am He.
Before Me there was no God formed,
And there will be none after Me.
.​

 

[ChristianFromKazakhstan]

So, I have a job and some close friends, but on my days off I can only find so many things to do before I get very bored, which is when I start to think about and sometimes engage in sexual sin.

I'm wondering how do most Christians stave off boredom which causes us to sin?

I'm sure if I had a girlfriend it would be ten times easier but, that's the other part, I kinda blew it.

this girl from work asked for my number back in August and she was perfect, very attractive, very kind, a Christian, didn't want kids which is rare and something I need in a partner, etc etc.

long story short I ended up talking about her on facebook and thanks to my friends they turned the conversation sexual, although I jokingly agreed with them about the things they were saying.

She of course saw it and then ended up dating my coworker instead, but to this day I can't stop thinking about her and the mistake I made, they've since broken up and I very badly want to talk to her, but I feel she doesn't have feelings for me anymore, I've prayed about it but get no answer. My pastor essentially said to let it go but, I don't know if I can.

So any advice on those two things would be much appreciated.

Thank you

Find a girlfriend and hopefully, marry her.

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

I'm wondering how do most Christians stave off boredom which causes us to sin?

come on here
CF I mean

 

[Hidden In Him]

Hi Handy Andy, getting busy helping others with their physical, emotional and spiritual needs, especially directly, as part of a Christian ministry (or ministries), is a great way to stave off boredom.

This is your answer. And I know exactly where you are living. I designed my life completely around God, determined to lead a simple lifestyle, not allow my mind to revolve around any anxieties or resentments, and trust God for my needs without worry.

Great benefits, but with a terrible unforeseen down side:
B...... o...... r...... e...... d...... o...... mmmmm.... God.... All...... migh......ty....... Please ...H.... E..... L.... P...... Me!!!!!!!

Ministry. If you have no other major ministries, stick you nose in this Forum night and day, and interact, pray and minister. You'll be needed, too.

More I might be able to say about other avenues you have tried, but I should probably wait for you to ask the questions first.

 

[ripple the car]

When I'm bored and distracted, I take myself out for coffee. And people watch. And feed the pigeons. It's awesome.

Find something simple, cheap, and satisfying that makes you happy, and fills the time you might otherwise be tempted to use for sin.

On the girl issues, I would proceed wisely and prayerfully, and not chase too hard after someone God may or may not have in store for you. Pray about it, talk to her, but be willing to let her go, too.

 

[Godlovesmetwo]

When I'm bored and distracted, I take myself out for coffee

me too. Go to a coffee shop almost every day. An read newspapers, inside out.

 

[GandalfTheWise]

What hobbies do you have? I know many people that would love to have the spare time to learn to play a musical instrument, learn a foreign language, build things, take art classes, read some books, go camping, hiking, etc.

In my life, I've noted boredom is usually the result of either 1. being overworked, overstressed, and unable to find the energy to do anything, or 2. not having enough passion about something to work on it. Often the two are related.

 

[St_Worm2]

This is your answer. And I know exactly where you are living. I designed my life completely around God, determined to lead a simple lifestyle, not allow my mind to revolve around any anxieties or resentments, and trust God for my needs without worry.

Great benefits, but with a terrible unforeseen down side:
B...... o...... r...... e...... d...... o...... mmmmm.... God.... All...... migh......ty....... Please ...H.... E..... L.... P...... Me!!!!!!!

Why do you believe that was so, the boredom part, that is? As for the rest of it, I didn't mean for Andy to necessarily "redesign" his life like you said you did, just to get busy helping others as a Christian (as that normally, from my experience anyway, has the "upside" of being very fulfilling ).

Also, as part of a church (and/or of a parachurch) ministry, you normally get to spend time working with and enjoying the company of other Christians, which also tends to fight off boredom!

Thanks!

--David

 

[Hidden In Him]

Why do you believe that was so, the boredom part, that is? As for the rest of it, I didn't mean for Andy to necessarily "redesign" his life like you said you did, just to get busy helping others as a Christian (as that normally, from my experience anyway, has the "upside" of being very fulfilling ).

Didn't mean to put words in your mouth, just thought I'd commend you for being "spot on" as far as your answer was concerned, and share my side of things.

Why do I think all that was/is so for me?

1. I bore easily, with everything.
2. Because of my calling, I do not have kids.
3. Without ministry I have three primary duties where my calling is concerned: Study, writing, and prayer (I write Bible Studies, called as a teacher). None of these activities can I sustain for great lengths of time. For one thing, when God reveals something to me in study and/or through prayer, I don't just keep pushing along like I'm trying to get through the Bible in 30 days. All work comes to an abrupt standstill because I am now "eating," i.e. digesting what God has given me, by meditating upon it over and over again to make sure I get it down into my spirit, so I'm not merrily going along a year from now, receive the exact same revelation from God, and suddenly stop and ask myself, "Hey? Wait a minute... I seem to recall learning this before..." It's part of my responsibilities, so it couldn't be any other way. Writing and prayer likewise consume extensive energy, and I can only do those for so long as well.

Result? Serious down time, waiting until I have the energy to again do work for God.

Yes, I know there are a lot of people needing help out there, and my wife often tries to tell me when she sees me getting bored, "Why don't you go help with this ministry, or that?" But that's just it. Those ministries He calls her to, not me, and because they're not something I'm especially called to, to engage in them would exhaust even more energy from me that I need to be storing up for what I am supposed to be doing.

Why do you ask?

 

[St_Worm2]

Why do you ask?

Well, only because doing something (especially something that is fulfilling) tends to alleviate boredom in most people, but you said that didn't work for you. So I asked

 

[Hidden In Him]

Well, only because doing something (especially something that is fulfilling) tends to alleviate boredom in most people, but you said that didn't work for you. So I asked

Be my guest. Keep on asking. Keeps me from getting bored. <Chuckle> : )

 

[St_Worm2]

Be my guest. Keep on asking. Keeps me from getting bored. <Chuckle> : )