- Jul 29, 2008
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Wow, I sit here to write about me what I went through and how Jesus saved me. It's so hard, I spend more time reaching for the tissues and wiping away my tears than writing. I see this little boy wanting to be loved wanting to belong and fit in, sitting on the ovel at school crying. wow how do I open up. It just so hard to think back and open up old things. Don't get me wrong, the Lord fixed all things and I am fine now, but looking back I just want to go to this little boy and love him. Let him know God loves him. Life can be hard ay. Just getting another tissue.
I was made fun of so much so I stopped going to school, I use to sit at the park or hang around shops. I suffed dyslexia yet when i went to school no one knew about this learning problem, I was just a joke to all.
the boys and girls made fun of me every second of the day, and when i got home if you can call it that, it started all over again. So I started a life of crime, I learnt how to fight and how to steal, not that I any good at that.
Yet I use to hear people talk about this guy they call God, I heard some stories about this fellow parting some water so people could get to safty, I thought great, I need to find this guy and ask him to help me. So i found a christain one day talking about Jesus, this lady said he loves us even the bad guys like me and he saves them from there problems, wow this is for me i thought, I can be saved from my problems. So I asked questions like how do i get saved. The lady said i have to say I believe in Jesus, i have to say i am sorry for my sins and read the bible. Oh dear, my first thought, I am doomed I can't read. Anyhow, how can I say I believe in Jesus when i don't know who he is. This was not going to be easy.
To cut a long story short, I gave up due to not being able to read or write, My life went down hill fast and I was in and out of childerns court and detention centers like a revolving door.
In my teen years i just wanted death to come so bad, I stole cars and crashed them deliberately, i drove over a side of a small cliff, i had a high speed police chase, I mean hight speed, I took the needle of the gauge. I was looking to die. When you are in this state of mind nothing makes sence to you.
It was not until I was in jail, that the idea of God must be found, so i started to seek God. After I got out of jail i asked everyone i could about God, all said the say thing, I had to read the bible. I cried, looking up at the sky i cried and said I need you to, you know. I was the first time i heard God speak to me, from that day until 19 years later now, I have grown in His love and we still talk today, I know many don't believe me when i say i hear God, thats ok. I know I do. Because He is God and can do as He likes. God helped me learn to read the bible, but I learnt his way in reading it not mans way, God told me many fail to understand because of interlect, in me i had non. God told me He was going to destroy the wise of the world and bring there knowldge to nothing. God showed me things and we talk for hours about life, people and how there are, we would talk about all things, and when God told to to open the bible most of the time it open to the page He wanted to show me. I had to and still do read real slow or i get stuck, but thats a good thing right.
Anyhow i feel safe in God, Jesus and The Holy Spirit, as they save me. They worked with me, they taught me, they loved me. So i hear them only and give no ear to man or ideas of men.
However a day came when a knock on my door rocked my world for a while putting my learning on hold and my understandings under question. Standing at my door were some Jehovah Witnesses who claimed to have the true understanding of Jehovah and so I presumed they too were all having a personal relationship with God, by the way they talked. Although I didn't understand their need for names or positions within their organisations, I just accepted it at that point as I had very little understanding on the different religions. We spent some time together, they knew I had left the Catholic Church and this was their way to lure me into their religion. I had no intention walking from one religion to another, but they tried very hard to persuade me. However one afternoon they rocked my world when we were talking about God, I was under the impression they were all fine tuned into God, but realized they were fine tuned into religion. When I told them I could hear God, that I was learning to have this personal relationship with the Lord they stopped and there was a deathly silence. I looked at their faces and then they told me to be careful to what I was listening to. I was puzzled by this statement; they proceeded to advise me that what I was hearing was an angel of darkness showing itself as an angel of light. I will never forget that moment and the feeling that came over me and how I felt inside.
Later I went down to the beach and sat on the rocks contemplating all they had said to me, I mean these were knowledgeable men, men of study they had books and leaflets but why would they give such credit to an evil force rather than that of a powerful force of light .
In all my confusion, in all the darkness the light shone brighter than I could ever imagine. What I experienced next was short of a power out of my control, I was shown a vision from God. I was looking at a limestone rock formation in the water and then one of the limestone pillars took on an image of Jesus. This image of Jesus took a drop of water from the sea and said to me "This single drop of water is mans knowledge, now see the ocean this is my knowledge. I am with you always"
Then all returned to normal and I realized that God had confirmed to me that it was not an angel of darkness quite the opposite. I couldn't wait to get home and share this with my wife and tell her what had happened. On my way home I turned on the radio and a Christian song came on and all my questions were just answered I will never forget the line to that song "It's a Spirit thing, a Holy thought in the brain". Yes I was tuned into the right station and was no longer going to tune into any other station. I learnt a valuable lesson that day not to rely on religious people to give you confirmation, for their understanding is limited and their knowledge comes from their teachers, but to rely on God alone for all confirmation of the things of the Spirit, because some just don't get it.
I could write about all my talks with God but this databse will not hold the inforamtion. But to all in seach for God, to all that find life hard and leaving you thinking why. Take heart because Jesus works best when you take your hands of, and let Him do the saving.
I have written a book, yes me, a man who could not read or write. God helped me put it together, so its his doing really. But I give ti to all free, as Jesus Gave to me free go to elitepub.net and follow the links to my book, The Shepherds Voice Book 1 don't forget to get the free screen savers too.
Love you all, Love God, jesus And The Holy Spirit...
T Man
I was made fun of so much so I stopped going to school, I use to sit at the park or hang around shops. I suffed dyslexia yet when i went to school no one knew about this learning problem, I was just a joke to all.
the boys and girls made fun of me every second of the day, and when i got home if you can call it that, it started all over again. So I started a life of crime, I learnt how to fight and how to steal, not that I any good at that.
Yet I use to hear people talk about this guy they call God, I heard some stories about this fellow parting some water so people could get to safty, I thought great, I need to find this guy and ask him to help me. So i found a christain one day talking about Jesus, this lady said he loves us even the bad guys like me and he saves them from there problems, wow this is for me i thought, I can be saved from my problems. So I asked questions like how do i get saved. The lady said i have to say I believe in Jesus, i have to say i am sorry for my sins and read the bible. Oh dear, my first thought, I am doomed I can't read. Anyhow, how can I say I believe in Jesus when i don't know who he is. This was not going to be easy.
To cut a long story short, I gave up due to not being able to read or write, My life went down hill fast and I was in and out of childerns court and detention centers like a revolving door.
In my teen years i just wanted death to come so bad, I stole cars and crashed them deliberately, i drove over a side of a small cliff, i had a high speed police chase, I mean hight speed, I took the needle of the gauge. I was looking to die. When you are in this state of mind nothing makes sence to you.
It was not until I was in jail, that the idea of God must be found, so i started to seek God. After I got out of jail i asked everyone i could about God, all said the say thing, I had to read the bible. I cried, looking up at the sky i cried and said I need you to, you know. I was the first time i heard God speak to me, from that day until 19 years later now, I have grown in His love and we still talk today, I know many don't believe me when i say i hear God, thats ok. I know I do. Because He is God and can do as He likes. God helped me learn to read the bible, but I learnt his way in reading it not mans way, God told me many fail to understand because of interlect, in me i had non. God told me He was going to destroy the wise of the world and bring there knowldge to nothing. God showed me things and we talk for hours about life, people and how there are, we would talk about all things, and when God told to to open the bible most of the time it open to the page He wanted to show me. I had to and still do read real slow or i get stuck, but thats a good thing right.
Anyhow i feel safe in God, Jesus and The Holy Spirit, as they save me. They worked with me, they taught me, they loved me. So i hear them only and give no ear to man or ideas of men.
However a day came when a knock on my door rocked my world for a while putting my learning on hold and my understandings under question. Standing at my door were some Jehovah Witnesses who claimed to have the true understanding of Jehovah and so I presumed they too were all having a personal relationship with God, by the way they talked. Although I didn't understand their need for names or positions within their organisations, I just accepted it at that point as I had very little understanding on the different religions. We spent some time together, they knew I had left the Catholic Church and this was their way to lure me into their religion. I had no intention walking from one religion to another, but they tried very hard to persuade me. However one afternoon they rocked my world when we were talking about God, I was under the impression they were all fine tuned into God, but realized they were fine tuned into religion. When I told them I could hear God, that I was learning to have this personal relationship with the Lord they stopped and there was a deathly silence. I looked at their faces and then they told me to be careful to what I was listening to. I was puzzled by this statement; they proceeded to advise me that what I was hearing was an angel of darkness showing itself as an angel of light. I will never forget that moment and the feeling that came over me and how I felt inside.
Later I went down to the beach and sat on the rocks contemplating all they had said to me, I mean these were knowledgeable men, men of study they had books and leaflets but why would they give such credit to an evil force rather than that of a powerful force of light .
In all my confusion, in all the darkness the light shone brighter than I could ever imagine. What I experienced next was short of a power out of my control, I was shown a vision from God. I was looking at a limestone rock formation in the water and then one of the limestone pillars took on an image of Jesus. This image of Jesus took a drop of water from the sea and said to me "This single drop of water is mans knowledge, now see the ocean this is my knowledge. I am with you always"
Then all returned to normal and I realized that God had confirmed to me that it was not an angel of darkness quite the opposite. I couldn't wait to get home and share this with my wife and tell her what had happened. On my way home I turned on the radio and a Christian song came on and all my questions were just answered I will never forget the line to that song "It's a Spirit thing, a Holy thought in the brain". Yes I was tuned into the right station and was no longer going to tune into any other station. I learnt a valuable lesson that day not to rely on religious people to give you confirmation, for their understanding is limited and their knowledge comes from their teachers, but to rely on God alone for all confirmation of the things of the Spirit, because some just don't get it.
I could write about all my talks with God but this databse will not hold the inforamtion. But to all in seach for God, to all that find life hard and leaving you thinking why. Take heart because Jesus works best when you take your hands of, and let Him do the saving.
I have written a book, yes me, a man who could not read or write. God helped me put it together, so its his doing really. But I give ti to all free, as Jesus Gave to me free go to elitepub.net and follow the links to my book, The Shepherds Voice Book 1 don't forget to get the free screen savers too.
Love you all, Love God, jesus And The Holy Spirit...
T Man
