My own story

[Michael.C.Hadley]

This is just the beginning

It begins at a parking lot a in the hills of western North Carolina. A boy who looked about 25 years old was there sitting in a go-cart at the starting line, he got the signal put pressure to the gas pedal and the machine lurched forward. The first 50 feet was a straightaway. He reached the end of the 50 feet the turn was a sharp turn he hit it going about 30 mph and went to another straightaway it was about 20 feet with a rounded turn he slowed down and went in. Next came the slalom not to hard. Then the homestretch, he crossed the finish line and looked at his time 50 seconds. Not bad for his first time racing. Michael parked the kart and took off his helmet. He looked at his watch and gasped. Ahh man I’m gonna be late for dinner. He sprinted towards his car, opened the door, slid in and started the engine. He put it into drive and pulled out. He had lived with sister for a year, she was a computer programmer a good one at that too. She had recently been contracted by the government to program some defense computers. Valerie was 28 and she had graduated college at 20. Michael was thinking about his life when a tractor trailer veered into his lane he stepped on his brakes but it did no good the back of the trailer slammed into his car and he went into a spin. When the car finally stopped spinning he was knocked out. But when he came too he was in an airplane over the ocean. Well look who’s awake. A man in a leather bomber jacket sat across from him. Huh what’s going on? Your on a plane over the Atlantic.



Well thats the first chapter but i have writers block can i have some suggestions?

 

[stiksensitive]

Sorry, but I really don't know where you are trying to go from here, so, I don't know what to tell you. Sooooorry!

 

[oncewaslost]

man, i did all this editing and then i was stupid and lost it. well, my edits are in red. you don't have to use them, they're just suggestions.

This is just the beginning

It began in a parking lot a in the hills of western North Carolina. A young man who looked about twenty-five was sitting in a go-cart at the starting line of a dusty race track. He got the signal pressed the gas pedal to the floor. The machine lurched forward, kicking dust and rocks into the air. The start of the track was a fifty-foot straightaway. He quickly reached the end of it and wheeled around the sharp turn he hit it going about thirty miles per hour. He raced down another straightaway that was about twenty feet and ended with a rounded turn. He slowed down going into the turn so he wouldn't lose control of his vehicle. The next section was the slalom but it wasn't too difficult. The homestretch came into view and he zoomed across the finish line, glancing at his time. Fifty seconds. Not bad for his first time racing. [paragraph break]

Michael parked the kart[sp?] and took off his helmet, shaking out his sweat dampened hair. He looked at his watch and groaned, [italics]Ahh man I’m gonna be late for dinner.[/italics] [paragraph break]

He sprinted to his car, pulled the door open, and jumped in, starting the engine. The engine roared to life and he put it into drive, pulling out of the parking lot and onto the main road. He had lived with sister for a almost year now. She was a computer programmer and a good one at that. She had recently been contracted by the government to program some kind of defense system but she kept the details secret. Valerie was twenty-eight and she had graduated college at twenty, the youngest in her class. Michael, distracted by his thoughts, didn't notice the tractor trailer veer sharply into his lane. He slammed on his brakes but it was too late. He swerved, hoping to miss the truck but it only made his car go into a spin on the slick roads. He slammed into a tree and was knocked unconscious. When he came too he found himself in an airplane over the ocean. An amused voice spoke up, "Well look who’s finally awake." [paragraph break]

A man in a brown, leather bomber jacket sat across from him, watching him lazily. Michael blinked, putting a hand to his aching head, "Huh? What’s going on? Where am I?" [paragraph break]

The stranger flicked open and close his pocket knife and smiled, "You're on a plane over the Atlantic."



Well thats the first chapter but i have writers block can i have some suggestions?

it's a good start. you can add more description and whatnot. like, what does michael look like? what do his surroundings look like? etc. as for continuing the story, what's his sister's reaction to michael's accident and disappearance? what does she do? what does michael do when he finds out he's been kidnapped? does he ever find out why he's been kidnapped?

you don't have to reveal the entirity of the kidnapper's plan but somehow you've got to get the story moving. i hope i've helped in some way. good job!