I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is
stalk them and hope they panic and give in...
I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just
jackasses.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is how you take it off.
I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.
I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things. I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep coming back.I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are
celebrities.
I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural
stupidity.
I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your
house, one of your kids did it
.
I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.
All I Need To Know About Life
I Learned From A Cow
Wake up in a happy mooo-d.
Don't cry over spilled milk.
When chewing your cud, remember. . .
There is no fat, no calories, no cholesterol
and no taste!
The grass is greener
on the other side of the fence.
Turn the udder cheek
and mooo-ve on.
Seize every opportunity and milk it for all it's worth!
It's better to be seen and not herd.
Honor thy fodder and thy mother
and all your udder relatives.
Never take any bull from anybody.
Always let them know who's bossy!
Stepping on cow pies brings good luck.
Black and white is always
an appropriate fashion statement.
Don't forget to cow-nt your blessings every day.
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. And the real pains in the butt are permanent.
stalk them and hope they panic and give in...
I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just
jackasses.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is how you take it off.
I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.
I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things. I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep coming back.I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are
celebrities.
I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural
stupidity.
I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your
house, one of your kids did it
.
I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.
All I Need To Know About Life
I Learned From A Cow
Wake up in a happy mooo-d.
Don't cry over spilled milk.
When chewing your cud, remember. . .
There is no fat, no calories, no cholesterol
and no taste!
The grass is greener
on the other side of the fence.
Turn the udder cheek
and mooo-ve on.
Seize every opportunity and milk it for all it's worth!
It's better to be seen and not herd.
Honor thy fodder and thy mother
and all your udder relatives.
Never take any bull from anybody.
Always let them know who's bossy!
Stepping on cow pies brings good luck.
Black and white is always
an appropriate fashion statement.
Don't forget to cow-nt your blessings every day.
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. And the real pains in the butt are permanent.
