Missing My Father

[Ruth~]

My father passed away in June. It's really starting to hit me. Some days I am very depressed and sometimes I am angry about it. I wish he had gone to a doctor and got his health checked out. But there isn't anything anyone can do anymore. I talk to him now. I didn't before. But I find some comfort in it. He did a lot for me in my life and I think I showed a lot of appreciation. We didn't always get along well but I made the effort to get along better by not disagreeing with him and avoiding arguments. My dad was close to God. I am becoming closer to God now as a result of the way I see my father lived his life. I have always been a Christian but maybe not always the best one. But I do try.

 

[Ruth~]

Can't anybody say anything to me?

 

[catlover]

My father passed away in June. It's really starting to hit me. Some days I am very depressed and sometimes I am angry about it. I wish he had gone to a doctor and got his health checked out. But there isn't anything anyone can do anymore. I talk to him now. I didn't before. But I find some comfort in it. He did a lot for me in my life and I think I showed a lot of appreciation. We didn't always get along well but I made the effort to get along better by not disagreeing with him and avoiding arguments. My dad was close to God. I am becoming closer to God now as a result of the way I see my father lived his life. I have always been a Christian but maybe not always the best one. But I do try.

I am sorry about your loss Ruth. I found this web site helped me.

http://www.groww.com/

I am happy your dad left you a legacy of faith.

 

[MikeMcK]

Can't anybody say anything to me?

I'm so sorry Ruth. I lost my dad when I was a teenager and I was very angry at him and hurt for the same reasons.

I hope you know that it's OK to be angry about it. It's even OK to be angry at your dad. That's a natural part of grieving and as time goes away, the anger will too.

I've been where you are and I know exactly what you're going through. I'd like to be there for you, if you'd like me to.

Please PM me if you'd like to talk about it.

 

[Ruth~]

I'm so sorry Ruth. I lost my dad when I was a teenager and I was very angry at him and hurt for the same reasons.

I hope you know that it's OK to be angry about it. It's even OK to be angry at your dad. That's a natural part of grieving and as time goes away, the anger will too.

I've been where you are and I know exactly what you're going through. I'd like to be there for you, if you'd like me to.

Please PM me if you'd like to talk about it.

Thank you so much, Mike, for your understanding. My emotions change almost every day. It's overwhelming at times and I just feel worn out.
Ruth

 

[rosenherman]

My father passed away in June. It's really starting to hit me. Some days I am very depressed and sometimes I am angry about it. I wish he had gone to a doctor and got his health checked out. But there isn't anything anyone can do anymore. I talk to him now. I didn't before. But I find some comfort in it. He did a lot for me in my life and I think I showed a lot of appreciation. We didn't always get along well but I made the effort to get along better by not disagreeing with him and avoiding arguments. My dad was close to God. I am becoming closer to God now as a result of the way I see my father lived his life. I have always been a Christian but maybe not always the best one. But I do try.

My mom died when I was 18, she just dropped dead. It took me a long time to be angry. By the time I was 40 and had gone through a few years of therapy, I realized it was okay to be angry. I felt like such a creep. I mean who gets mad at dead people? But. . .She left me! She didn't love me enough to stay around! That was mean of her! I'm 50 now and I still get ****ed at the idea of her dying on me, but I know it's normal and I'm okay for feeling that way.

You are in a much healthier place to start with than I was. You'll hurt for a while, then you'll notice you don't hurt so much. You'll miss him always, but you'll remember him so warmly, so lovingly. He'll be a part of you, you'll have him forever in your heart. As you age and put more and more of what he taught you into practice you'll find yourself becoming more like him and you'll be happy with that.

 

[Ruth~]

Thank you Rose.

 

[JaneFW]

My father passed away in June. It's really starting to hit me. Some days I am very depressed and sometimes I am angry about it. I wish he had gone to a doctor and got his health checked out. But there isn't anything anyone can do anymore. I talk to him now. I didn't before. But I find some comfort in it. He did a lot for me in my life and I think I showed a lot of appreciation. We didn't always get along well but I made the effort to get along better by not disagreeing with him and avoiding arguments. My dad was close to God. I am becoming closer to God now as a result of the way I see my father lived his life. I have always been a Christian but maybe not always the best one. But I do try.

Hi Ruth. I lost my dad at the end of July, so I know where you are coming from. He had been sick for a long time, so it truly was a blessing that he was out of pain. However, that's so easy to say, when my heart keeps crying out "but he was my DAD." I didn't have a very good relationship with my dad but we reconciled in the last 6 or so years, and I was able to tell him that I loved him before he died. That really mattered.

Ruth, one thing I took on board when my dad died - it became really important to me - was that I make his death "count". I dont' know if that sounds odd, but really I want his death to matter, for me to change because he was my dad and I did love him, and I needed to do something to mark him passing. For me, that has included slowing down my hectic pace of life, taking time to smell the daisies, being more patient with my kids and husband, and listening to God with my ears pinned wide open, rather than Him fighting to be hard over the usual tumult of my life! That way, I'm showing my dad that he did matter to me, and confirming to myself that he did too.

I dont know if any of that makes sense, but it has helped me to cope.

God bless you, saying a prayer for you.

 

[UnitynLove]

You will be with him after while. If you wish too you could download a song called "After While" by Deitrick Haddon. This song really helped me cope with Losses in my life.

 

[artjack]

Can't anybody say anything to me?

I have just lost my father also, I feel the same as you, I hope I have become a better person, I dont know wheather to relax or not, I try to, I didnt get to say good bye while he was alive but I have made him some promises. I hope this helps and I know if he can help me he will and I feel he is through faith. some people may say we were lucky to have them so long and there are worse off! maybe so but I dont think about it like that, right of I share your greif and thank god for life, I know its a test, I dont know why. but everyone goes through it.

 

[Ruth~]

Thank you all for your kind words. I'm at a loss for words right now. I just really miss my dad a lot.

 

[rushingwind62]

My father passed away in June. It's really starting to hit me. Some days I am very depressed and sometimes I am angry about it. I wish he had gone to a doctor and got his health checked out. But there isn't anything anyone can do anymore. I talk to him now. I didn't before. But I find some comfort in it. He did a lot for me in my life and I think I showed a lot of appreciation. We didn't always get along well but I made the effort to get along better by not disagreeing with him and avoiding arguments. My dad was close to God. I am becoming closer to God now as a result of the way I see my father lived his life. I have always been a Christian but maybe not always the best one. But I do try.

Ruth,
I lost my dad three years ago. So I know where you are coming from. It will get easier as time goes on but you will always have your days and moments when you miss them and all you can do is cry. The way I get through each day is that I remember all the things dad taught about life and I try my best to do what he would have done. Sometimes in the stillness of my mind I can almost hear him giving me advice. I know that may sound funny to many but it gets me through the hard times and causes me to walk with my head high. I am proud of who my dad was and you should be too.... ....God Bless You....Rush

 

[Ruth~]

RushingWind, thanks so much for all you said. It really means a lot to me. I miss my dad and he was a good man who taught me plenty. I'm sorry for your loss. Bless you.

 

[formykidsiwill]

Dearest Ruth, I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost my Father in June of 2000. I hope your having a good day, my baby is crying so I can't say much more, maybe later.

Blessings,

 

[Ruth~]

Thank you.

 

[AndreayCard4]

Try to lean on God and trust him to help you through! I understand how hard holidays are. On Jan 12 2004 My father passed away, and on May 28 2004 My older brother took his own life! It has been a crazy storm for me but I am slowly getting through it! I definetly have a lot emotions I need to get out through.

 

[.Sabre.]

Ruth, I know how you feel. I lost my dad this February, and it's been tough for me.

 

[Ruth~]

Try to lean on God and trust him to help you through! I understand how hard holidays are. On Jan 12 2004 My father passed away, and on May 28 2004 My older brother took his own life! It has been a crazy storm for me but I am slowly getting through it! I definetly have a lot emotions I need to get out through.

I'm sorry for your losses. Today is not the best day for me. I am at a loss for words but I appreciate your post to me.

 

[Ruth~]

Ruth, I know how you feel. I lost my dad this February, and it's been tough for me.

I'm sorry you lost your father, too. It's so sad. Today is not one of my better days. I'm praying for you and everyone here.

 

[Solange7]

Ruth
I'm so sorry for your loss...I can't even imagine how sad you must be....
My dad is alive and well,thank God,and I love him SO much but I know I'm gonna lose him someday.
This thread reminded me of how afraid I am of that.
That's something we all have to go through...Just remember that he is in a better place now....And cry as much as you want to,that's healthy
Please keep your head up and be strong...
I'm sure he would want you to be happy if he was with you now....So don't let it get the best of you.
Try to use your energy for positive things...
I can't really help you over the internet,but I would do more if I could.
I will pray for you and your Dad's soul tonight
Much love and God bless
P.S.Sorry for my English