Married and in college...

[USA]

Who was married and in college at the same time. How did you manage? Where did you get the finances for college and to live on? Where did you live?

 

[redwing030]

Well actually we are still in that situation. I graduated in college in the spring of 2003 and we got married that fall. A week after we got married my husband started back to school. It's been about 2 years now that we've been married and he's been a student. He has 2 more years of school still.

We pay for school through financial aid (both pell grants and student loans). We pay for the rest of our expenses by me working full time and him working 24 hours a week. We don't make a ton of money by any means, but we have enough to pay all our bills, have some nights out with friends, and still be able to save a bit.

We live in Ohio by the way. When we first decided to put ourselves in this situation I was really worried about how we'd pay for everything, but God has provided for us much more than we could have ever imagined.

 

[Mirelys]

I am in college and my husband is in the Army. I have a scholarship, so we don't have to worry about those expenses, thankfully.

Where did you live?

Right now, South Korea

No, I know what you meant...
Before, we lived in married housing (much cheaper to get housing through the university than off-campus). Now, we're looking for an apartment, but it will have to be off-campus because they don't have married housing here.

 

[Leanna]

When we got married my husband was in college and I decided to work full time so we could pay the bills. The deal was that he would go to school, get a degree, get a job and then I would have kids and/or go to school. So he has a job now and I have one child who is 1 year old and I attend college part time. I was 19 when I got married by the way, so we have been married more than 5 1/2 years. It's taking a while. Oh and we lived in an apartment about 2 blocks from his school and owned one car that we shared and I drove to work.

 

[Solitaire]

Like many of the other posters, we've done it by having one of us in full-time work, whilst the other is at university. I don't see how we could manage if we were both students ... I certainly don't think we'd be able to stand on our own feet like I believe you should if you are getting married.

It can be hard sometimes, because I am at uni part time, whilst my dh works full time. Sometimes I feel bad about not contributing as much as him financially, but then he reminds me that my contribution is in other ways: At this point I do 99% of the housework and cooking, simply because that is what works for us. It can get stressful when I have a huge workload and dh does at the same time (he is often away for work), but nobody ever said marriage would be an eternal bed of roses so we work through the tougher times by keeping our eyes firmly fixed on where we are going.



Oh, to answer your last question, we own our own house. Dh is older than me, and had a bit more of a nest egg than I did, so we were able to start off quite well. It is a fix-er-upper (which we are in the middle of the process of, oh joy!), but it is quite nice, and most importantly, ours!

 

[Shok]

When we got married I was in college working part time and she worked full time. After I graduated we were both working full time.

Six months after I graduated we had a first kid. Three years later we had our second kid. Six years later my wife went back to college and got a BA and is now teaching full time while our kids are in school.

Wasn't easy but it worked out great. I'm so glad she was home for their early childhood.

Shok

 

[Autumnleaf]

Who was married and in college at the same time. How did you manage? Where did you get the finances for college and to live on? Where did you live?

I was. GI Bill paid rent and school. We lived in college family housing.

 

[Singin4Him]

I am currently. My husband actually works full time as their senior web developer at the university we both attend. He's getting his Masters and I'm getting my BA, I don't work right now because I'm taking classes full time and I really don't plan on working until I get out of school plus we're TTC right now as well.

As far as finances our school is payed for by the University because my husband works there. We own a brand new home which we pay for as well as all our bills, we married with savings and with no debt and have not acquired any debt while being married. I think those things helped a lot, I strongly advise not marrying if you significant debt or cannot pay your bills. There's nothing wrong with financial aid and married couples get great financial aid as well but don't get married if you have to rely on someone else to pay your bills and such.

So basically we manage just fine but the secret to that is ALWAYS giving God the glory and making sure we rely on HIM to provide. Now if you are 17-19 and you are just about to begin your first semester of college I strong encourage you to wait a year and allow yourself to have the college experience before getting married. I think that is very important in a young person's life, be out on your own for a bit before you decide to commit your life to someone for the rest of your life.

 

[HeatherJay]

I was. GI Bill paid rent and school. We lived in college family housing.

We did the same thing. We were both full time students. Neither of us worked. We living in married housing on campus and we lived off the GI Bill, a few grants, and student loans. It wasn't bad at all. Pretty easy, actually.

Plus, we had a baby. We staggered our class schedules so that one of us could keep her while the other was in class...and when that didn't work, she went to class with me in a Snugli (I was lucky that I had a very quiet baby and very understanding professors). When she was 6 weeks old, she started going to campus day care which made it tons easier.

Anyway, maybe I was really naive or something, but I thought managing school was pretty easy considering that neither of us were working.

 

[MesaBoogieGrl]

We married at 21 and were both still full time undergrads. It was his senior year and my second senior year (so sometimes perfection takes a little longer, hehe). We both worked part time (I had a federal work study at the campus bookstore and he was a worship leader for our church's youth group). He had a scholarship and I had loans, but our pell grant was great because in Louisiana they max out your amount if you're married and you file on time. His parents gave us a little financial assistance that first year to help cover the bills. That first year was definitely the hardest, but I wouldn't trade it!

Then we moved cross country so I could go to grad school while he worked fulltime. Finished that (using loans exclusively, yikes!) and now we're working. Still not ready for kids yet though.

 

[Leanna]

As far as finances our school is payed for by the University because my husband works there. We own a brand new home which we pay for as well as all our bills, we married with savings and with no debt and have not acquired any debt while being married. I think those things helped a lot, I strongly advise not marrying if you significant debt or cannot pay your bills. There's nothing wrong with financial aid and married couples get great financial aid as well but don't get married if you have to rely on someone else to pay your bills and such.

Personally I thought financial aid for married couples was dismal. We hardly got any help at all, of course it was just my husband going to school, but we were way below the poverty line. The first year of our marriage I made less than 15,000 dollars working full time and paid all the bills on it. Our parents didn't help us at all, we didn't want them to of course. And we didn't get a single grant, just a bunch of loans that we will be paying on for the next 15 years or so. If we had it to do over again, we would have done it differently for sure. Those loans were a mistake.

Now that I am in school and have a baby, suddenly they're giving me tons of help. Our income is higher too. I applied for part time aid (which is supposed to be a lot worse than full time) and I got two grants that not only covered my tuition, books, and supplies for my photography class but also we got the extra money back to use on a house payment or something.

When my sister in law, who is in college starting this semester, informed us that she wanted to get married next summer and that the financial aid is great for married people we gave her this look: . Yeah, whatever!! Especially since her fiance makes more money than my husband does now and he won't be in school either. But being young people, neither of them believe us that its not that great.....

 

[Leanna]

Hmmmm... I guess that makes it look like the way to go is to have a baby..... lol..... just not if you're not ready for it!!!

 

[Autumnleaf]

We did the same thing. We were both full time students. Neither of us worked. We living in married housing on campus and we lived off the GI Bill, a few grants, and student loans. It wasn't bad at all. Pretty easy, actually.

Plus, we had a baby. We staggered our class schedules so that one of us could keep her while the other was in class...and when that didn't work, she went to class with me in a Snugli (I was lucky that I had a very quiet baby and very understanding professors). When she was 6 weeks old, she started going to campus day care which made it tons easier.

Anyway, maybe I was really naive or something, but I thought managing school was pretty easy considering that neither of us were working.

Isn't it amazing how terrific things can be when you just let God work!

 

[HeatherJay]

Isn't it amazing how terrific things can be when you just let God work!

It really is.

 

[Leanna]

Yeah I think if we had both gone to school and had a baby, that would have been swell fun. Too late for us to do that now.....

 

[Entertaining_Angels]

When we first married, I continued working while my husband finished his bachelors. After he graduated, we had our first baby and then I went back to finish my bachelors. I got pregnant again while working on my masters and, in fact, I missed my very last final for my masters because my water broke several weeks early (they were understanding )

Unfortunately, we used too many student loads before I started getting grants and scholarships so eventually I'll have to go back to work to help out. Honestly though, it wasn't hard at all on us.

School, babies and marriage, they can all work together.

 

[Galadriel]

Wow, it sounds like the financial aid out there is pretty good for those wanting to go back who need the help. Of course it does depend where you live and such. I am newly married (2 months!) and I currently have an associates degree. I wouldn't mind going back to college if I could figure out what I wanted to do! Once I get that figured out, and if that involves more college, then we would find a way to do it. Its funny because right now I feel like we are at a cross roads where we could go several different ways. Its just figuring out which way to go!

 

[Beth1231]

Married and in college. Yup, I'm in that club. We got married during Christmas break last year and last semester was really difficult financially but we survived. Now we both work (hubby full time and me part time) and I'm taking 7 credits. Jan-March I student teach and then *fanfare plays* I graduate in May!!!!!
I got a nice PA grant and some loans to finish paying off school. My parents want to help me finish up, so I'm grateful for that. Then it's time to start with loan pay-off....
Side Note: I cannot imagine having a baby on top of all of this, but I know God gives grace to those who need it when they need it.

 

[Cordy]

My husband are both full-time students, and have been since we married during our undergraduate degrees. I think being married students is GREAT!

One big pro for us is the financial aspect. Our student life costs are much lower together then if we were attending school as single students. I was able to complete the last two years of my undergraduate degree (while married) without having to take out my own student loan. My husband received one, and we scrimped and shared his funding, as well as our part-time earnings, to avoid deeper debt (that we would have entered had I taken a student loan, too). I would not have been able to do that had I not been married.

Our academics have also improved since we married. I was a stressed out over-achiever and my husband a more “laid back” student when we first married. We have been able to balance each other out, and, as a result, both of our marks improved. Our married student couple friends have noted the same thing.

It has also been a great way to start and grow in our marriage. We have had to learn to be flexible, and how to accept support and encouragement as well as give it when the other is in need. We have had to learn to be “fair” in sharing household duties, and how to truly pitch in to make both of our experiences as students better. It has brought is into the mentality of, "whatever needs to be done is what I should do", as opposed to, “that is my job, and this is his.” I guess it helps make the burdens in life lighter when we both share them as opposed to divide them.

We love being married students, and we both agree that we are very thankful that we have this opportunity to go through this stage of our lives together. Although we are in different programs, we spend hours together studying our respective courses, take midnight snack runs during exam time, and help each other out when we are frantically finishing all-nighter assignments. It has brought us very close, and strengthened our relationship.

We have lived off (but close to) campus, as well as on campus (as we do presently). We have had to really learn to trust God for finances. We feel this is where we are lead to be right now in our lives, so we just have to trust that God provides, and well, He does! Praise Him!

 

[4childofgod]

My Husband was working to get hid BA I stayed home with the kids know he teaches. My youngest is going into second grade. My oldest in 5th so I have been taking classes at the JC. this is my last class then I will apply for the Nursing Program. Wer never had to pay a dime besides books for my Husbands schools. Pell Grant and others. Hard to be married do school and work!