Many changes...

[Gwen'sMom]

My husband and I married just over 5 years ago. At the time we were both not Christians. I am pleased to say that I am one now and have been for about 1 year. DH has no interest in becoming one and I have never pushed him.
DH has also become so dissalusioned with his (almost) failed real estate business and is just not the same man I married. He is uncaring and cold, and money-hungry. He has even said he has thought of leaving for the last couple of years. We also have a 3-year old daughter. We had a bit of councelling and many talks with our older married friends.
He even said he doesn't care that he is hurting me with his coldness, that's the way he is he says.
Will God hate me if I decide to leave?
DH said that he won't change so should I not try to find happiness?

 

[Brotherfromanothermother]

It's tough for anyone being in similar positions to yours.
I thought I saw you mention the money hungry thing in another
post. What do you mean? I assume your husband was warmer earlier on? What do you think brought about the change? The baby perhaps?
1 Corinthians 7:15 KJV: But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
It talks about the unbeliever departing, not the believer. I think in this situation (without manipulation or coercion) if he wants to leave
then that's his decision but you are bound to him if he wants to stay.

 

[Gwen'sMom]

When I say money-hungry I mean he is willing to do almost ANYTHING to make money and even if it means splitting us up. He no longer cares about family.
Sure he was so wonderful, warm and caring before he started Real Estate. But because money is always never there all we have in tension.
So if he decides to leave then God will forgive but if I do he won't forgive me? Even if I have tried everything to make things work? I will have to stay married to this different person?

 

[Brotherfromanothermother]

I understand...
I know personally I was so busy trying to make enough
to pay bills make the wife happy etc that I made money (or
the making of it) more important than family at times.
It was actually the wife that was willing to split us up
to make more. (long story)
I'm in no way an expert but having read those passages
before trying to save my marriage it would seem that you
are bound to him unless he decides to leave because you are
now a believer and he is the unbeliever. That's not to say the
Lord won't forgive you or send you to hell, I believe He would
continue to love you as His child. He has a plan though and many times we don't like His timing. I'm guilty.
There's also the fact that many "Christians" walk away from
marriages all the time. Is it right......? Well no, I don't think so.
That's what happened in my case BTW.

 

[Autumnleaf]

Maybe he wants you to go so he can tell himself he didn't fail to provide for his family. Don't let him copout like that. Tell him you have faith in him to take good care of his family. After all, you would never choose to marry a loser so he must not be one.

 

[Gwen'sMom]

Maybe he wants you to go so he can tell himself he didn't fail to provide for his family. Don't let him copout like that. Tell him you have faith in him to take good care of his family. After all, you would never choose to marry a loser so he must not be one.

Hi AutumnLeaf, my only problem is that I think I have lost faith in him. Real-Estate agents are so near the top of the list for divorce. I know that he thought this job would be so much easier. You are right, I didn't marry a loser but he has changed so much in the last 3 years. Not as a loser but someone who has completely changed his way of thinking. My daughter and I are near the bottom of his list when it comes to his priorities. I am finally ready to move on.

 

[4Christ2]

Gwen'smom,

Just a quick question....is there someone else (another man) who is waiting for you to leave your husband?

Also, my name is Gwen so I feel a bond with you although you aren not my mom..are you?