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PixieSunbelle

formerly xladyfayre
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When i was 16, it was my first year as a junior counselor at heart camp. but what i was about to hear- one could not prepare themselves for. five of our heart camp members had died over the school year. camp would not be the same. I knew 3 of them. we all had/have heart problems...
but this is not something one thinks about when going to even a camp for children with heart disorders.
Just last year i had lost the ability to go to camp- as well as 3 more heart camp friends. The hardest was Amanda.
That same year i lost my bestfriend- Nathan. We met online... we talked on the phone, IM, and on the message board we met on. We planned on someday meeting.
Lately... things are going in a downward spiral. I'm having worse panic attacks and i'm passing out. i just cant take it anymore.
 

womanofvalor

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(((Pixie Sunbelle)))
I'm so sorry to hear of the passing of your five friends that you met at summer camp. I have found that death doesn't care about age, since the passing of my 23 year old daughter suddenly last March.
I know, with the health problems, that the pain of the "heart" in having to give up friends can be even harder for you.
The best comfort, of course, is in knowing that they are in Heaven, where there is no more pain or sorrow. They are walking or soaring free without the cares of this life that we have to endure so often.
But I also know that the death of a child who hasn't reached adulthood or who is just a young adult is indescribable in the pain that friends and family have to endure. It's something that we can't understand. Parents are supposed to go before children and it's not the natural order of things on earth.
I wish you peace in this journey of grief. I pray that God will give you peace even though your heart is breaking now for your dear friends.
I just recommended a book to another post here and I think it might help you, too. It's one I read just after Erin left us for Heaven and it helped me to see what Heaven was like through the eyes of children.
It's called "Closer to the Light," by Melvin Morse, MD
My husband got it off of Amazon.com, if you can't find it in your local library. I'm not promoting any one book, but this book brought such comfort to me. It's about cildren who have had near death experiences and what they saw and felt when they were 'out of body' for a few minutes. It's just confirmation to me that Heaven is real.
I wish you peace today!!
Hugs to you!!!
 
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Petunia

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For God has not given us the spirit of fear..
but of power, and of love and of a sound mind.
KJV II Tim.1:7

I pray that you receive peace and calmness.
Philippians 4:7 - The peace of God surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Whatever happens in this life, God is so much bigger. And God is still in control. In God there is life. We feel the loss of our loved ones, but should also remember that they are not just 'gone'. Physical death is not the end of existence. Those who have gone on.. are more alive than we are. They are still your friends. They still know you, and love you.
 
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SunMessenger

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