long distance relationships

[ouse]

what about them... are they good? will they grow?

 

[flounder7786]

i think it honestly depends on the people...some are just not cut out for LD relationships...i personally didnt think i was, until i was thrown into one due to BF going to college...but i have enjoyed every minute of it...and it has helped us grow leaps and bounds, and made us realize that communication is key in a relationship, not presence...even though, that is nice also...but so yeah, i think they are great...if you need to know anymore...feel free to PM me

 

[inrsoul]

Coming from personal experience, long distance relationships are quite painful to maintain. I had one that lasted 2 years, my ex was shuttling in and out of the country (she was studying in australia and coming back for the holidays). Sure, some people find it easy to deal with the distance but I think such a relationship will eventually grow stale and tiresome without physical contact (and in that I do not mean sex). That relationship did not allow me to grow with her in Christ. Though she might have been a christian, both of us drifted off further from God in that sense.

 

[ouse]

k... heres another question, what if yo think that both people are at different points in the relationship, like, one is still infactuated and the other has come to realize that the other person has their flaws...

along with that how do you know that you are not keeping the other person from being with someone better for them maybe where they are geographically.....

sorry im putting this all in one thread but i dont want to make seperate ones for them and i dont see that they already exsist.

oh, and thanks for the other responses

 

[invisiblebabe]

As far as the pace of long distance relationships, I do think the people involved in them should be careful to take things VERY slowly, as the more spread out in-person time does prove to show that there are facets of someone we may not see until later (time-wise) in a relationship.

With the type of people who would be most conducive to being in an LDR, though, I think much of it comes down to the abstract/concrete dimension of thought and perception, as well as communication. Is it necessary to have shared experiences building the relationship at the beginning? Or, will it suffice to have shared thoughts, emotions, and ideas?

Of course, how much physical affection one needs comes into play too.

 

[PurpleBunny]

This question has been asked and answered and asked and answered and asked and answered.. do the threads disappear afterawhile? lol

I've cut my response down to: My husband and I met on the internet a year and a half ago, started dating in early april in an LDR, now we're married and having a baby. *nods* Thats all. hehe

Hm. I should come up with a quick summation kinda answer too.

My fiance and I met online 4 years ago and have dated for a little over two years. We got engaged a year ago. So they can work.

But I had 4 long-distance "relationships" of lengths from 1 month to 5 months fail as well, and usually fail spectacularly with much self-destruction involved.

 

[California Dreamin']

They can work!

 

[ouse]

But I had 4 long-distance "relationships" of lengths from 1 month to 5 months fail as well, and usually fail spectacularly with much self-destruction involved.

sound like a good time... ummm how do i know im not in one thats self-destructive... or is it like everything else and i just have to trust it?

 

[inrsoul]

Sure it will work but both parties must be 100% with each other. Think about this way, some people have problems being forthcoming face to face. Communication is key!

 

[Glorianna]

Mine has, does that count? They can be a lot more work but are definitely worth it!

 

[ouse]

thanks for all your relpys but i still havent come to a solid conclusion... i think its something about comunication....

 

[Glorianna]

Yeah, communication is hard because phone bills can rack up like crazy. My fiance and I have a special plan called Vonage though. It's an internet based phone company. See if you can get a special plan and it's most definitely worth it, even though it can be hard at times!

 

[Peculiarone]

what about them... are they good? will they grow?

Sure can work depends on th epeople in them and how long and the committmenet. i am in one and it is driving me crazy. I am about to quit it! I will seek God's face first.

Bless.

 

[Glorianna]

Sure can work depends on th epeople in them and how long and the committmenet. i am in one and it is driving me crazy. I am about to quit it! I will seek God's face first.

Bless.

Oh wow, definitely seek God's wisdom and His will. I will be praying for you.

 

[PegasusOnFire]

Well I met my hubby 11 years ago, in school. Once we graduated I went to college and he went into the NAVY, and that is when we fell in love with eachother, or at least admited that we were in love with each other. Our LDR lasted for 4 years, before we wed in November last year.

I think they work, but you do have to talk to eachother. My hubby and I had calling cards that worked great for calling, and we both had internet accounts where we were. So e-mailing and IM'ing eachother was a plus.

I am not going to sugar coat it and say that LDR's are easy and well worth it, they are infact very hard, and sometimes not worth the work put into them. I would really sugest seeking God's wisdom for his will in your own life, and the life of the one that you are wanting to have an LDR with.

In the 4 years my hubby and I were apart we saw eachother a total of 4 times before he was discharged from service, honorably discharged. The lack of physical contact, hugging, cuddleing and such, we were both virgins on our wedding night, was something that we missed, but I think that was more because it was war time, still is, but we are making up for that lost time now.

 

[Glorianna]

I am not going to sugar coat it and say that LDR's are easy and well worth it, they are infact very hard, and sometimes not worth the work put into them. I would really sugest seeking God's wisdom for his will in your own life, and the life of the one that you are wanting to have an LDR with.

If you find the one you're supposed to marry through an LDR, it's definitely worth it. There will always be times when you wish it wasn't an LDR though because it's very hard.

 

[PegasusOnFire]

If you find the one you're supposed to marry through an LDR, it's definitely worth it. There will always be times when you wish it wasn't an LDR though because it's very hard.

 

[Glorianna]

I wasn't sure if you'd agree with that after I read your post!