leaving your past at the altar....

[NitrousInfected]

I have been told by a number of people, when you go down to the altar and accept Jesus Christ as your personal saviour, you should leave all the sins of your past at that altar. I have had a very hard time doing that. I am having problems with this, no one is using my past against me, but I still feel some guilt over the things I put my oldest son through. For the first 3 years of his life I was too busy snorting Meth to be a father, and so was his mother. I understand there is a fine line between using past experiences to Glorify God, and dragging the baggage with you so to speak. I love God with all my heart and desperately want to serve him the best that I can. My preacher told me that the experiences of my past will enable me to reach people, that he and other members of our congregation would not, in similar situations as I was in. Which excites me that God would allow a drug addict/dealer/user to serve his kingdom.I have been drug free for over 5 years now, and although I wasnt saved when I walked away from drugs, I knew that God was at work, because I couldnt have done it alone. Even though I have trouble leaving my past behind me I want to walk the path that God would have me take, but I feel that I need to resolve this and learn more about the God I love, before doing this.

 

[HisFireFly]

I have been told by a number of people, when you go down to the altar and accept Jesus Christ as your personal saviour, you should leave all the sins of your past at that altar. I have had a very hard time doing that. I am having problems with this, no one is using my past against me, but I still feel some guilt over the things I put my oldest son through. For the first 3 years of his life I was too busy snorting Meth to be a father, and so was his mother. I understand there is a fine line between using past experiences to Glorify God, and dragging the baggage with you so to speak. I love God with all my heart and desperately want to serve him the best that I can. My preacher told me that the experiences of my past will enable me to reach people, that he and other members of our congregation would not, in similar situations as I was in. Which excites me that God would allow a drug addict/dealer/user to serve his kingdom.I have been drug free for over 5 years now, and although I wasnt saved when I walked away from drugs, I knew that God was at work, because I couldnt have done it alone. Even though I have trouble leaving my past behind me I want to walk the path that God would have me take, but I feel that I need to resolve this and learn more about the God I love, before doing this.

YES... our FATHER forgives and forgets and we praise HIM for HIS faithfullness and HIS grace. But HE also uses the things of our past to help others.
HE will not call you to do a task that HE hasn't first prepared you for. Keep on studying HIS Word, spending time in prayer and learning to hear HIS voice. When HE calls, you will be ready to respond.
Thank you for sharing a bit of your story here. It brings glory to the ONE we all serve.

HisFireFly

 

[SteadyRock]

Guilot is a ploy of satan. He uses it to make us scared of God and doubt His ability to forgive. The truth is, emotions are decieving. You have to learn how to find God's voice and to trust God's voice. Your sins do not exist in God's eyes because you now have the past of Jesus! It is amazing!!!!!
Hallelujah Lord for saving this guy!

 

[newestwed]

I will pray for you. KNOW God does forgive. He does that because he loves us. It is coming to forgive ourselves that is the most difficult part. If you need encouragement please PM me. I will be praying.

 

[Laurasia]

Hello Nitrous.

I understand how you feel. I will be celebrating my Holy Confirmation next Easter, & my relationship towards Christ & God has not always been a respectful one.

I have gone through many trials & traumatic situations in my life, & felt abandoned by Christ & God. In my immaturity & inability to comprehend His plan, I believed myself discarded & thrown away by Them. However, things have improved immensely for me & I now use my past experiences to help others in similar situations. It has finally been revealed to me why I had to suffer such things.

However, I still have issues of guilt surrounding my past conduct towards Chirst & God. I understand that this is a hurdle of my own to get over. Christ & God have made it VERY clear to me that they do not hold anything against me. Their love is unconditional, indeed.

I am currently reading a book (one of many) that may be of some help to you. I find it helpful. LOL! It's called "Putting The Past Behind : Biblical Solutions To Your Unmet Needs" by Dr. Les Carter.

Just remember that He loves you, regardless of what you have done. He will always forgive you, so long as you have truly repented for your sins. It sounds as though you have already repented, dear. Which means that the feelings that you are now having are completely your own. God loves you, but do you love yourself? I think that, much like myself, you need to learn to love yourself a bit more.

Just keep praying & speaking with the Lord. Ask Him to help you through this time of self-doubt. He will be there for you. If you would ever like to talk about anything, feel free to PM me.

Good luck, sweety, & God bless!

Sincerely,
Laurasia

 

[VivDaGurl]

The minute you confess your sins, God forgives you. Ask God to give you the strength to also forgive yourself. Satan is never happy with this and always wants to bring more people to himself especially those who had became the believer of Christ. He always remind you of your past and make you feel guilty. Take up the sword and fight it through. Proclaim the promises of God.

The Lord is with you and no one shall take you away from Him!

 

[whatseekye]

Before I say anything, I just want to give you a hug and my heartfelt congratulations on getting your life healthy and being there for you wife and kids. That is so wonderful.

Jesus told us that his yoke is light.

At that time Jesus said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure.
"All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him.
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (-- Matthew 11:25-30, NIV)

I love those verses! Jesus is showing us that he does want us to be yoked under his Lordship, yet what he requires is going to be restful and and feel easy and light to us. I believe that the reason this is true is because he always teaches us according to our personal needs and our abilities at the time. God does all the work and he holds us up as he does that work.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. (-- Hebrews 12:1-3)

To me that's fascinating. What is heavy and burdensome is the sin and stuff in our old sinful nature that drags us down, and sometimes even the opposition from other people. But we know that Jesus is the "author and perfecter of our faith"! So we don't have to do anything other than cast ourselves on Him. You are right about feeling that God helped you years before your acceptance of Him. God knew us and loved us before we were through with trying to do it our way. "We love because he first loved us." (1 John 4:19, NIV)

So now that I've said all that, and I feel more confident that what I tell you next won't be taken as a burdensome thing, I wanted to mention that perhaps you could be benefited by studying a little in the bible concerning being born again. Because the reason we can have rest and peace and joy and love (and be confident that our sins are forgiven) is because we have died to our old sin nature when we repent and believe and rely on Jesus Christ completely. That's what it means to be born again. Your old nature dies.

But on the other hand, I think it's natural for us to have a long memory when it concerns our past and the things we regret. One thing that helped me understand the concept of sin was to realize that when I believe and repent and am born again, I am justified through the blood of Christ so that God doesn't count my sins against me. They say that the Father actually doesn't remember our sins since he accounts us righteous through our faith in Christ. But that doesn't mean that we suddenly develop memory loss and forget the past. But it doesn't matter what we think of ourselves because we know that only the opinion of God matters. With some time spent with him, I believe he will build you up in your new life. After many years of walking with Christ, St. Paul said:

Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful. I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me.
(--1 Corinthians 4:2-4, NIV)

Keep in mind that St. Paul persecuted Christians! He participated in the stoning of St. Stephen by looking on and approving the stoning. He also hunted Christians down so mercilessly that he was on the road to Damascus to hunt them in a foreign land. So he was so committed to doing evil to the Christians that he would travel really far to do it. And in the middle of this sinful plan, the Lord met with him and literally changed him from his old corrupt nature to the man we know and love as an apostle. So knowing that, you read his words I quoted above about not judging himself, and it's remarkable. God is amazing. It's also interesting how Paul says "My conscience is clear, but thta does not make me innocent." No indeed. A guilty man can feel as innocent as a baby. And an innocent man can feel horribly guilty. But in faith, we know that we need Christ because of our sin nature and our weaknesses, and when we rely on Him fully, we are blessed.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
(-- 2 Corinthians 12:9-10, NIV)

All these great truths concerning being born again are things that the Holy Spirit can and will reveal to you. Spend time with Jesus in prayer and reading your bible, and you will find great peace and rest in the certainty of God's promises to you. God bless you.

2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new."

 

[Sketcher]

When God forgives, God forgives. I would concentrate on raising your son right - you're only 29, so he can't be that old, meaning it's not too late for him.

God has forgiven you -

"And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God." - 1 Corinthians 6:11 (emphasis mine).

" He does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust." - Psalm 103:10-14

When you feel guilt, know that God has forgiven you and banish that feeling. Instead, pray for your son.

 

[bshaw96]

You sound just like me. I was taught (or led to believe) that once you go to the alter (or wherever) and get saved, you walk back a completely new creature. Yes, you are a new creation in Christ, but the flesh is still here and the enemy will now be hot on your tail! I have slowly learned you have to start anew every day. The enemy will bring your past up. But here's an old saying I used to have on a tshirt that fits:


When the devil reminds you of your past, remind him of his future!


Its true. Rest assured God has forgiven you and your sins are not remembered. But it is a growing process. I still have guilt over many of my past sins, though Im completely forgiven. And there are still areas of my life I struggle in daily. Just keep taking it to God and it will over time get easier. But know that as long as you're on this earth, the enemy will try to use your mistakes (past, present, and future) to bring you down and make you think you're not forgiven or you'll never get past certain obstacles. But you will. It's not a one time transformation, it's a daily growth. But what you are feeling is satan's number 1 weapon with new christians. Just tell him who's boss (God) and to get behind you. He knows he has no authority over you, but if YOU don't know it, he still has power. Doln't give him that authority! God bless!

 

[Jedi christian]

Remember, when you ask Jesus to forgive and repent, your sins are covered by his blood. He won't remember your sins. They are erased immediatly!

 

[LilRitt04]

Your sin has been forgotten and God doesnt remember what you did and he casted it into the "Sea of Forgiveness" I have personally given up my past at the foot of the cross only because once you do it is a million pounds off of your body and you will feel refreshed almost like you can conquer the world. Even though nobody is dwelling on your past...its there and you cant change what you did, but you can change your future, and by giving up your past and laying at the cross...you are giving that to God and he will take over. He has already taken over your life in the aspect that he saved you and you are a Christian, but in a sense you are still bound in your past, and your past needs to be the past...Once you lay at the foot of the cross, walk away and dont look back. People commonly look back to there past for comfort...dont you are stepping out of your comfort zone by taking that leap of faith and letting go of something that made you feel "comfortable" for so long...

God is going to help you through it, and he is going to let you live your days like there is no tomorrow and you will feel so much better!

 

[NitrousInfected]

You folks have no idea what a releif and comfort it is to know that others have the same feelings as i do sometimes. Especially thank you for the prayers and the hugs, It has been a very long hard road, and I still struggle with self-forgiveness, but it is getting better, and I am building my life from here on out on the firm foundation of Jesus Christ. And I pray almost hourly for Gods direction in raising not only my son who is now 8, but my other 3 children as well. And that God will make me the husband I should be.

Again Thank You all