Kids suffer

[madison1101]

Hi everyone,
I have been divorced for almost four years now. Since then, my ex and I have tried to not make the kids choose between us. This summer, I planned a vacation that I invited the kids to in March. The vacation is in August. My ex's family has scheduled a family reunion for the weekend of my vacation. This makes the kids choose between joining me at my cabin and going to his reunion.

Needless to say I am angry and upset. It looks like the kids will choose the reunion, because it is geographically more convenient to them. I am having trouble coping with my negative feelings now.

Trish

 

[Avaya]

Trish, your kids are old enough to make this decision - and I bet they're not suffering either. LOLLOL This is just one of those things that happens. You were under no obilgation to run your vacation dates by their father and he was under no obligation to run the reunion dates by you (if the kids were under 18, I'd say that the adults would need to make the decision about that, but since they're older . . . . ). It's going to happen like this forever. There will be many times that they will have to choose. Hopefully they will be 'adult' about it and if they're missing you this time, maybe next time there has to be a choice made, they'll go with you instead. Face it, even if you weren't divorced, once the kids were married, this would still come up, there would be times that your family and the in-laws would have something planned on the same dates and they'd have to choose. It's just part of life. So I encourage you not to be angry and negative about it, go and enjoy your vacation!

 

[jenelis]

I'd say Avaya just about covered it.

it's natural to be disappointed and angry. Just not a whole lot you can do about it.

-Jennifer

 

[Autumnleaf]

Your poor kids. Stuck between two people they love wanting to make both happy.