Just tired

[Celticroots]

As I've stated in other posts, I live with my Mom due to disability. She has depression that she is not seeking help for, nor taking medication for, even though she said she would go to the doctor and ask about getting medication.

She's tense all the time and it's affecting me too. No matter how hard I try to not let it, and having depression myself doesn't help.

We are looking at places where people with disabilities can live where your meals are cooked for you and you're helped with job training, cleaning etc. Some have classes you can take. Great, except they're expensive. Very expensive. One only accepts private pay but says you may qualify for financial aid. But they didn't bother to say what type of financial aid. Sigh.

My parents are divorced. In order to make something like this work both would have to pay for me to stay there. I would contribute some as well, which I wouldn't mind. My Mom said they would try their hardest to get me into one of those places.

I can't live in a group home. I just feel I am too high functioning and feel I wouldn't get along well there at all. I've also had friends who were also high-functioning that lived in group homes that hated them. One didn't like it because she and the other residents didn't get along (I think it was due to differences in level of functioning. I can't remember.)

I've also heard stories from a woman whose daughter is in a group home. The daughter is in an electric wheelchair. Other than that she seemed to do well. The staff put her to bed at 6:00pm; they obviously didn't like their jobs. She's a 40 year old woman. That's just sad.

Others in group homes had carers who wouldn't clean them up if they couldn't do it themselves; they'd go around with dirty faces or with food staines on their shirt. And it was evident that these carers in these homes didn't like what they did (I got that vibe having met some of them.)

Still others in these homes felt they couldn't go to staff when they felt a rule was unfair or other things.

Another hated his group home because he was given no freedom. They had to go everywhere as a group. I can see why he hated it. I couldn't live like that.

When my depression flares up, my thinking gets myopic. I can only see the bad and have trouble seeing that God knows the plans He has for me, and they're good ones. I just want to know that He knows I want to be content and safe when I am out on my own. That that's not asking to much in terms of prayer. I don't want to end up somewhere where I am miserable where I am only seen as a paycheck.

 

[Winken]

I'm personally aware of a Christian organization buying an abandoned apartment house complex, cleaning it up, opening a kitchen, and providing rooms to the less fortunate, including "street people." They have in-house security. There are no costs for those who live there. The entity is supported by private contributions and Christian organizations, including local churches. You might want to look into an option like that where you live. I'd sure spend some hours trying to find one.

p.s. They provide counseling, rehabilitation, and job training.

 

[Celticroots]

That's interesting. Honestly, I don't know how I would feel about being in the same building with homeless people. I'd be concerned about anyone being able to live there, especially those with serious mental health issues, drug problems, or criminals like sex offenders. I'd want there to be certain criteria that needs to be met for people to live there. (No criminal record for example.)

To live in the places I mentioned, you have to have a certain level of independent functioning. (bathe, dress yourself, brush your teeth, etc) And they also don't take people with serious behavioral issues( violence toward others.) You also cannot have a criminal record.

 

[1am3laine]

As I've stated in other posts, I live with my Mom due to disability. She has depression that she is not seeking help for, nor taking medication for, even though she said she would go to the doctor and ask about getting medication.

She's tense all the time and it's affecting me too. No matter how hard I try to not let it, and having depression myself doesn't help.

We are looking at places where people with disabilities can live where your meals are cooked for you and you're helped with job training, cleaning etc. Some have classes you can take. Great, except they're expensive. Very expensive. One only accepts private pay but says you may qualify for financial aid. But they didn't bother to say what type of financial aid. Sigh.

My parents are divorced. In order to make something like this work both would have to pay for me to stay there. I would contribute some as well, which I wouldn't mind. My Mom said they would try their hardest to get me into one of those places.

I can't live in a group home. I just feel I am too high functioning and feel I wouldn't get along well there at all. I've also had friends who were also high-functioning that lived in group homes that hated them. One didn't like it because she and the other residents didn't get along (I think it was due to differences in level of functioning. I can't remember.)

I've also heard stories from a woman whose daughter is in a group home. The daughter is in an electric wheelchair. Other than that she seemed to do well. The staff put her to bed at 6:00pm; they obviously didn't like their jobs. She's a 40 year old woman. That's just sad.

Others in group homes had carers who wouldn't clean them up if they couldn't do it themselves; they'd go around with dirty faces or with food staines on their shirt. And it was evident that these carers in these homes didn't like what they did (I got that vibe having met some of them.)

Still others in these homes felt they couldn't go to staff when they felt a rule was unfair or other things.

Another hated his group home because he was given no freedom. They had to go everywhere as a group. I can see why he hated it. I couldn't live like that.

When my depression flares up, my thinking gets myopic. I can only see the bad and have trouble seeing that God knows the plans He has for me, and they're good ones. I just want to know that He knows I want to be content and safe when I am out on my own. That that's not asking to much in terms of prayer. I don't want to end up somewhere where I am miserable where I am only seen as a paycheck.

You usually could go to low income housing and say you have a disability. Then you would be with high functioning people unlike a group home but, you might like a group home if you could keep your cellphone and computer.

 

[Celticroots]

I have seen good low income housing, although there is a waiting list. It sometimes takes years to get a place.

Not all group homes are bad. The competency of the staff is a big factor in whether the place is good. Residents are a close second. For me it would take much more than being able to have my laptop and my phone for me to be happy in one.

1. The staff would have to be competent and care about what they did, and not treat those living there like children. When you’re stuck with someone who doesn’t like what they do, it affects you and makes you feel like a burden.

2. Privacy: my own bedroom and my own bathroom(preferably). If I have to share a bathroom I’d have my own toiletries.

3. Independence: I want to have a choice in whether or not I want to go on group outings. I want to be able to go to a movie or go shopping on my own. I want to have my own spending money.

4. Residents: I’d want to live with people who are on the same or nearly the same level of cognitive/ physical functioning that I am and who I get along with.

5. The home is located in a nice area of town/ city with a nice neighborhood.