Just got fired... for the first time

[ahmunmun]

Something inside still cannot believe how my morning went. I was in my job for just under 3 months (so near the end of the probationary period but not quite) when my boss told me it wasn't working out. He then went on and on about the procedures of signing off and packing, almost like he didn't want to give me a chance to respond. When I finally was able to ask why, he said he didn't want to go into it and that wasn't the point of it. I did ask again before we were leaving the boardroom and he said he had previously talked to me about that. Maybe he thought that was a "serious talk", but to me, he just wanted to find out in what areas I needed additional training as he saw some mistakes in my work. I definitely didn't take that as a "warning" or anything. After that, I got a little bit more training but there were still lots that I hadn't been taught and didn't know how to do properly. Now, today, he said it wasn't working out. I honestly don't understand why he didn't have another talk with me and get to the bottom of the training issue. To him, firing was a quick fix (before my probation was up); to me, it wouldn't resolve anything as my replacement would probably make the same mistakes if this manager still doesn't realize that the lack of training is the issue.

But, as with everything else, I have to evaluate myself and know that there were things I could've done better. I don't want to place the blame entirely on someone else. I know there were times when I let my personal issues affect my work performance (especially when I lost a man briefly in my life recently). Yes, I didn't have enough training for my job, but with the training I got, I admit there were a few occurrences where I could've been more focused.

Just wondering if anyone here has been fired shockingly, where your boss almost didn't want to tell you why, and when he briefly said "I already talked to you about this before" you didn't feel justified. How were you able to comfort yourself? Also, normally when something sudden like this happens for me, I believe God is behind the scenes and about to do something big. From your experience, did you feel God was behind the scenes when you lost your job and what did God end up doing for you?

And please pray for me! Now I have to deal with being abandoned by that man briefly in my life, and now being fired. I have never been fired before. I was getting better recovering from the first issue and now I'm afraid that this being fired situation would cause a relapse.

 

[ahmunmun]

Other than praying for my two issues, can someone tell me how I should approach future interviews where the interviewer would ask why I wasn't working? I'm not going to lie and pretend I left the job on my own, but how would I tell them what happened without sounding like I was blaming someone else instead of myself? Should I tell them in as much detail as I told you guys?

 

[Paul01]

I've been fired before. Ended up being one of the best things that ever happened to me.

 

[Albion]

You probably understand the situation correctly--near the end of the probationary period and they didn't want you as a permanent employee. Why that was, you most likely will never know. It could be that they just run through probationers until the point where they're required to cover them with some additional benefits. Or they might have found some fault in you--but not necessarily.

Yes, this happened to me, but they cut out the entire shift, so that wasn't really comparable.

It takes awhile getting over it, and it's hard not to take it personally, but try. The abrupt manner in which you were let go is standard operating procedure in a lot of firms. I've seen execs escorted off the premises by security guards a moment after being told they're being let go. The company doesn't want anyone to have the chance to do any mischief on their computer, steal something, or do anything else as an act of revenge.

As for future job applications, it's awkward. I might approach it by making it clear that the job was only for three months with no promise of future employment. Employment agencies funnel a lot of temps to certain industries and most of them are not hired on after the probationary period is up.

 

[Pal Handy]

Other than praying for my two issues, can someone tell me how I should approach future interviews where the interviewer would ask why I wasn't working? I'm not going to lie and pretend I left the job on my own, but how would I tell them what happened without sounding like I was blaming someone else instead of myself? Should I tell them in as much detail as I told you guys?

You could tell them the truth about the lack of training and your lack of focus
because of your personal issues and also you could tell them that you have
learned a valuable lesson to speak up when you need help and not to let your
personal life interfere with your carreer.

I think that your interviewer would appreciate your honesty and
the fact that you are willing to learn from your mistakes and improve.

I believe that this is an opportunity for you to go forward
and find a better and more rewarding job so don't be afraid
and keep trusting in the Lord to guide you to a better position.

Father in Jesus name I come to You and I ask that You would be
with Your daughter to encourage her and that You would take away
from her any discouragement, fear or condemnation and
that You would bless her and lead her to a better position than the
one she had.

Give her the courage she needs to speak the truth and to trust
that as she is being honest and open with others, You will reward
her efforts and give her the favor she needs to be hired at
a better place than the one she left.
In Jesus name I ask....

 

[Rebecca Sue]

I will pray for you. Would you believe I recently got fired by a text message? I still can't believe it! Hang in there, I will keep you in my prayers. By the way I had had the same job for over 23 years before this. Ugh...

 

[ValleyGal]

I've been fired before "without cause." It came as a surprise after working there for a year. I was devastated. When I go for interviews and the question comes up about why I left my last job, I let them know that it turned out that our values were not as alike as I'd hoped...and that it appears this agency (the one I'm interviewing for) would be a better fit. It is always important to state the truth, and if the truth is not good, it's important to tell the potential employer what you've done to correct the issue that got you fired.

Getting over it can be hard - especially if it was a job you enjoyed, or if there were attempts to communicate and rectify issue prior to being fired. I attempted to address the issues in my job (the supervisor was an office bully), and that's what really got me canned in the end. Had I known where to report the agency, I would have....in fact I still would....the bully is being groomed for management, but she literally does not work by the agency values. I'm still upset as it has had a huge negative impact on my professional career.

 

[ahmunmun]

Paul - thanks for replying and I would love to hear your story if you are comfortable sharing!

Albion - I didn't know that, about how some firms operate like that. If this was a temporary job wouldn't they tell me at the point of hire? I just don't want to lie in interviews and say that it was meant to be three-months only, when it was supposed to be a permanent job. Maybe you can explain more what you mean and that way I'll make sure I don't make any lies.

Pal - thank you for your thoughtful advice. I have no problem explaining like that. I just hope it won't affect my interview in the future but I will trust God. Thanks for typing out my prayer too! I appreciate that a lot. Can I ask one small thing and that is you pray for that other issue with me already being abandoned by that man who was briefly in my life? I was near recovery from that situation and I need prayer that this job loss won't cause a relapse because that would be terrible. Just like how this is my first time getting fired, that was my first time being abandoned by a man who I was this close to (also my fault but I've learned from it), so I hope this won't be too much for me to take.

 

[ahmunmun]

Sorry, I didn't see some of the replies and I missed the last two people.

Rebecca - What? How can you get fired over text message? That is rude and unofficial. Please tell me the story. How did you get over your feelings? And please since you're praying for me, pray about that other issue about a guy leaving me because I was really close to healing and now I have to deal with this job loss. I don't want this job loss to have a relapse on my emotional healing on that first issue. Thanks!

ValleyGal - I am so sorry it happened to you as well. When you explained like that, would an interviewer DIRECTLY ask you "Did you leave voluntarily or involuntarily?" I've had an interviewer ask this directly before... but thankfully I left voluntarily so telling the truth was easy. I can't see myself lying but I am curious anyway as to how blunt most interviewers are nowadays. This isn't a job I like anyway, but it's a job that I can live with that will allow a stable income (although not too much income). I was going to look for another job anyway but I was just surprised that I got fired without an explanation until I pushed for one and even then I barely got much out of the boss.

 

[Pal Handy]

Paul - thanks for replying and I would love to hear your story if you are comfortable sharing!

Albion - I didn't know that, about how some firms operate like that. If this was a temporary job wouldn't they tell me at the point of hire? I just don't want to lie in interviews and say that it was meant to be three-months only, when it was supposed to be a permanent job. Maybe you can explain more what you mean and that way I'll make sure I don't make any lies.

Pal - thank you for your thoughtful advice. I have no problem explaining like that. I just hope it won't affect my interview in the future but I will trust God. Thanks for typing out my prayer too! I appreciate that a lot. Can I ask one small thing and that is you pray for that other issue with me already being abandoned by that man who was briefly in my life? I was near recovery from that situation and I need prayer that this job loss won't cause a relapse because that would be terrible. Just like how this is my first time getting fired, that was my first time being abandoned by a man who I was this close to (also my fault but I've learned from it), so I hope this won't be too much for me to take.

Take this time to draw closer to God in Christ as you pour out your heart,
concerns and fears to Him in trust, knowing that He loves you and wants to be part
of you life in a greater way than ever before.

1 Peter 5:7
casting all your care upon Him (Jesus Christ), for He cares for you.


Praying for you...

 

[ahmunmun]

Take this time to draw closer to God in Christ as you pour out your heart,
concerns and fears to Him in trust, knowing that He loves you and wants to be part
of you life in a greater way than ever before.

1 Peter 5:7
casting all your care upon Him (Jesus Christ), for He cares for you.


Praying for you...

I'm taking the part I underlined as a prophetic encouragement! Thank you!

 

[ValleyGal]

I've never been asked by a potential employer whether I left my last job voluntarily or involuntarily. I don't actually say that I was dismissed without cause - except once when an interviewer wanted to know the reason according to my record of employment. I told them I was "fired without cause" which was a polite way of saying our values do not line up.

If you were fired, you did not leave voluntarily. Still, even if they ask a blunt question like whether you left voluntarily, you can be more vague on the answer. You could explain that it turned out that you didn't quite have the training they had wanted, and had they not let you go, you likely would have realized you were not cut out for the position anyway.

Where I live, employers do not have to provide you with a cause for dismissal if they terminate within the probationary period. If your employer provided you with even a little, consider yourself lucky - that way you know how to overcome that same issue next time.

Hopefully you will be able to deal with your hurt feelings about being fired (and abandoned by your man). It should be easier if you didn't like the job. I loved my job; I just did not like the supervisor at the office I was in. I requested a transfer and was told no (even though they had transferred others in my situation). I tried working the issues out with HR, but a couple of weeks after my appointment with her, SHE got fired. As it turns out, it's a very incestuous place to work, and they hire and fire people all the time, wasting government funding....it costs our government about $70,000 every time they "turn over" a new hire, and this happens to about an average of 5 every year, not to mention the ones who are "investigated" and fired after spending many years there.

On one hand I'm really glad to be out of that environment, but it was really hard to deal with not being able to say goodbye to the people on my caseload and being "fired." I had been "let go" from a small, part time job prior to that, but that really, really did not bother me in the least because although they advertised for a social worker, the job was all administrative.

I think one of the ways to help you deal with the emotional fallout is to remind yourself that you really didn't want to work there anyway, it likely showed, and they did you a favor so now you can pursue the career you really do want.... then go for it!

 

[Albion]

Albion - I didn't know that, about how some firms operate like that. If this was a temporary job wouldn't they tell me at the point of hire? I just don't want to lie in interviews and say that it was meant to be three-months only, when it was supposed to be a permanent job. Maybe you can explain more what you mean and that way I'll make sure I don't make any lies.

Right. You don't want to lie, but you might choose your words carefully if the situation is what I suspect it might have been. There are a lot of companies (and I don't know what kind this one was or whether you were sent to them by an employment agency), that specialize in the "90 day probation and then we may keep you on full time" routine. This frees them from a lot of obligations they would otherwise have if you were hired outright with no mention of any probationary period. As you draw near to the end of the probationary period, they are likely to fire you unless conditions are then right for them, you are especially wonderful, and all that. BUT most are let go and new probationary employees are always coming in behind them.

You probably were not the best ever, and you made mention of some problems, but that doesn't mean you were not satisfactory, either. Had you been hired outright, they would probably have worked with you, but in this scenario, it's on to the next contestant. It's a constant winnowing process.

Of course, it matters what state we're talking about, but this is possibly what was going on. In any case, you were not a temp, that's true, but neither were you a regular employee. You were trying for a possible regular position with no promises of getting it, and I think you might be able to make a quick reference to the kind of job it was the next time you are asked why you left your last place of employment.

 

[pgp_protector]

Other than praying for my two issues, can someone tell me how I should approach future interviews where the interviewer would ask why I wasn't working? I'm not going to lie and pretend I left the job on my own, but how would I tell them what happened without sounding like I was blaming someone else instead of myself? Should I tell them in as much detail as I told you guys?

Tell them the truth.
You and your previous company weren't a good match, and " it wasn't working out"

 

[Cernunnos]

Imagine going into a board room, waiting for others to arrive, expecting a promotion & then you see through the window, two police come & you get that sinking feeling they are there to escort you out. I didn't even get to go back to my office from the HQ to get my coffee mug! Surprises like that happen sometimes. In that case, a new VP wanted to take our department a different direction and so they cut everyone with more than a year of experience.

 

[pgp_protector]

Imagine going into a board room, waiting for others to arrive, expecting a promotion & then you see through the window, two police come & you get that sinking feeling they are there to escort you out. I didn't even get to go back to my office from the HQ to get my coffee mug! Surprises like that happen sometimes. In that case, a new VP wanted to take our department a different direction and so they cut everyone with more than a year of experience.

Nothing like that on my end.
Just one day we all came in as normal, noticed "extra" security, and they sent everyone home, never even got my accrued vacation time

 

[Cernunnos]

To make matters worse the boardroom had a window looking down 5 floors into an atrium, so I saw the officers coming in & heading for the elevator (not a building with a frequent police presence). I guess all those days I was working from 9 am to 10 pm . . . 6 and seven days a week, covering shifts because we were short staffed, they knew I loved my job & were worried I'd flip out. Silly on their part.

I agree with the people who mention the 90 days and flip thing. Indeed that too has happened to me. That job I don't even list on my resume. If they aren't reputable enough as a business to use the 90 day probationary period as something to dodge paying benefits.. . . they aren't reputable enough to put on a resume.

 

[parsley]

two police come & you

Police escorts! Overboard.

I know someone who had a similar abrupt layoff after 20+ years, and then the manager called back and ask if they wanted to do contract work, because they were so valuable to the team.

He then went on and on about the procedures of signing off and packing, almost like he didn't want to give me a chance to respond.

This is proper procedure these days. If emotions flare, the manager might say something that could be used in court later.
"I also didn't like the way you chewed gum too loud!"
"When you broke up with that guy and didn't date me, what did you expect?"

These days, an employer is not allowed to claim problems with disabilities, gender, race, age, religion, personality... so they have to be careful what slips out of their mouths.

It could be that they just run through probationers until the point where they're required to cover them with some additional benefits.

That was my first thought; I have dealt with the no-benefits offers over and over.

The manager is accountable to someone else for tight budgets, so he probably hired you with the expectation that he would let [90%] go at the end of that wave of probationary hires.

As you draw near to the end of the probationary period, they are likely to fire you unless conditions are then right for them

PROBATIONARY CONTRACTS

Years ago there was a certain breakfast restaurant chain that used to hire people in an undefined probationary period, under minimum wage, and then keep telling employees that they were still not ready to be officially hired. I knew people who worked there over a year, on probation.


I ran into a company once that did not hire ANY full employees. After digging, I found they would get a student intern to do web design, and one to do marketing-- for no compensation other than experience and the pride of building a startup.

Those interns would build up the company to the point of appearing solid, and then the employer would sell the company. The "employer" had already spun off several, from what I could tell. No investment, just profit. The interns had no idea they were being used, because it was too bizarre to accuse someone of that.

BEING FEMALE

I have been told multiple times by employers that women have babies and are therefore unreliable. In the US, statements like that can be confronted by legal action, but I wouldn't want to be rewarded with employment at a firm that felt that way. I have degrees showing that I am serious about my work (and got one while having babies and working).

MORE ON CONTRACTS

I decided not to renew a short-term contract once, and was told i had to give up my computer account before my prior contract was fulfilled. It was ridiculous because it was not technically quitting, or being fired, or showing disgruntled behavior -- I just decided that the contract did not fit with the rest of my schedule. So then I looked bad because the contract I did agree to ended so awkwardly.

I know there were times when I let my personal issues affect my work performance (especially when I lost a man briefly in my life recently).

INTERVIEWS

Don't show weakness. Just don't. Change the subject.
You were there on probation, and the time was up. Don't describe how unfair it was, or your theories on why it happened. If you can back it up with numbers, that might be an option -- i.e., if the company hires 30% of probationary employees, or if a large group of you left at once.

Your focus in an interview should be how you can help the future company.

I know I've already written way too much, but wanted to add one thing. Coworkers can be catty. If they want to get ahead, some will use unfair tactics to make you look bad. That's life, that's the world.

I know someone who was an "A" student working on a respectable degree, and they got fired from a fast food job. They were frustrated that in all the different ways they had to prove their reliability and diligence, they failed in an area they considered easy -- but in reality, the job requirements there were speed, accuracy, safety, cleanliness, teamwork, uniform dressing, treating customers in a friendly way... not having all the right answers.

 

[ahmunmun]

Thanks everyone. I enjoyed reading everybody's responses.

Right. You don't want to lie, but you might choose your words carefully if the situation is what I suspect it might have been. There are a lot of companies (and I don't know what kind this one was or whether you were sent to them by an employment agency), that specialize in the "90 day probation and then we may keep you on full time" routine. This frees them from a lot of obligations they would otherwise have if you were hired outright with no mention of any probationary period. As you draw near to the end of the probationary period, they are likely to fire you unless conditions are then right for them, you are especially wonderful, and all that. BUT most are let go and new probationary employees are always coming in behind them.

You probably were not the best ever, and you made mention of some problems, but that doesn't mean you were not satisfactory, either. Had you been hired outright, they would probably have worked with you, but in this scenario, it's on to the next contestant. It's a constant winnowing process.

Of course, it matters what state we're talking about, but this is possibly what was going on. In any case, you were not a temp, that's true, but neither were you a regular employee. You were trying for a possible regular position with no promises of getting it, and I think you might be able to make a quick reference to the kind of job it was the next time you are asked why you left your last place of employment.

The thing is, the company was giving me benefits so it wasn't like they could say they were trying to save costs by firing me and hiring another short-term employee. The person I replaced worked there for a year and a half. Also on my offer it did say probation was 3 months.

I wish I could believe what you said about some companies to make me feel better, unless if you still think this could be true for my company. Based on what I told you, it just seems like I have to face reality by admitting I got rejected/canned or however you put it.

I've been feeling a little traumatized. To be honest, being abandoned by that man affects me more. I'm 29 and just don't want to be alone anymore. At the same time he wasn't right for me and I know that if I had gotten fired while he was around, things would've been more chaotic, so it's a good thing he's already out of my life. Still... I am more lonely than ever, being at home without anyone texting me sweet messages, without a job to go to. Despite how I feel, I should take this as a blessing in disguise, even though as a human it is natural to get caught up in your current emotion than looking at the big picture.

 

[Albion]

I wish I could believe what you said about some companies to make me feel better, unless if you still think this could be true for my company. Based on what I told you, it just seems like I have to face reality by admitting I got rejected/canned or however you put it.

Well, I do think it--or a variation of it--may well be in operation in your company. And the basic way "it" works was verified, from personal experience, by others here: Cernunnos and parsley.

BUT we all are simply going on the hints you gave us, and it could be that your company was not operating that way but simply decided not to extend your employment for some other reason. Still, what Cernunnos and parsley said about how the "designated dismisser" does not give any real explanations should sound familiar, I think.

In the end, we don't have enough information to know but we wanted you to consider these insights as you think about your experience and your future. I'm sure that we all hope to have you feel better, but I do not think any of us would have lied to you just to console you.

You are at a low point now but it will get better. Don't get down on yourself because others made mistakes.