Just A Tad Upset

[AdJesumPerMariam]

I am taking RCIA, and I received aphone call yesterday from the person that is the head of it. My husband does not, at this time, choose to be Catholic, although he did agree to go through the annulment process, and remarry in the Church. We started this process last summer, and received a letter saying we were in the final phase in October. We have not heard anything since. Anyway, when I first started this, they said I could come into the Church even after Easter, if the paperwork did not come in. Yesterday, my RCIA leader was saying that they really did not like doing that..............I was baptized Catholic, just need to be confirmed & go to confession, or is it the other way around?

I really want to be a part as soon as possible, and I do know I could go the the bigger Church up the road, and be able to do it as soon as I can. I just really don't want to switch Churches.

Suggestions?
(I hope this makes sense)

 

[geocajun]

talk to your parish priest, its up to him when you are received, and he can do anything he wants.

 

[Carrye]

I am taking RCIA, and I received aphone call yesterday from the person that is the head of it. My husband does not, at this time, choose to be Catholic, although he did agree to go through the annulment process, and remarry in the Church. We started this process last summer, and received a letter saying we were in the final phase in October. We have not heard anything since. Anyway, when I first started this, they said I could come into the Church even after Easter, if the paperwork did not come in. Yesterday, my RCIA leader was saying that they really did not like doing that..............I was baptized Catholic, just need to be confirmed & go to confession, or is it the other way around?

I really want to be a part as soon as possible, and I do know I could go the the bigger Church up the road, and be able to do it as soon as I can. I just really don't want to switch Churches.

Suggestions?
(I hope this makes sense)

These situations are rarely simple, so let's dig in.

You were baptized Catholic. Did you receive First Communion? I assume not.

Also, about your marriage: Is this your first? If so, why not just have it convalidated? ... no need to go through the annulment process.

But I'm guessing that I have this all wrong, because your priest surely knows better than I.

 

[AdJesumPerMariam]

These situations are rarely simple, so let's dig in.

You were baptized Catholic. Did you receive First Communion? I assume not.

Also, about your marriage: Is this your first? If so, why not just have it convalidated? ... no need to go through the annulment process.

But I'm guessing that I have this all wrong, because your priest surely knows better than I.

They said my husband has to go through the annulment process, but since I was never married in the Church, I did not have to. No, I have never taken First Communion. Tell me about the convalidated thing.

 

[Carrye]

They said my husband has to go through the annulment process, but since I was never married in the Church, I did not have to. No, I have never taken First Communion. Tell me about the convalidated thing.

Ah, your husband! Shows what kind of amateur canon lawyer I am! Convalidation is sort of like the Church's blessing upon a marriage that took place secularly - in Las Vegas (in general, lol) or at a courthouse. But if your husband was married before, the Church is right in requesting an annulment proceeding.

As to your status: It really is up to the priest. You want proper formation before being received into the Church. You need Confession, Communion, and then Confirmation. But those can all happen at your priest's disgression. I know you want it to be as fast as possible, and I'm in no position to tell you otherwise, but if nothing else, I would advise against parish shopping ... even if it is for this. Find your place, stake out your spot, and trust that you are where you should be.

 

[AdJesumPerMariam]

I do want proper formation before being received. God called me back to the Church, and I know it will happen...I am impatient, but I am trying to be patient. I was just told that once everything was in, I could actually be received anytime...

 

[Carrye]

I do want proper formation before being received. God called me back to the Church, and I know it will happen...I am impatient, but I am trying to be patient. I was just told that once everything was in, I could actually be received anytime...

Once everything was in? You mean the paperwork for the annulment?

 

[AdJesumPerMariam]

I wish! No all is in, but all has to be approved, first. Then we can make an appointment to get married by the Father. THEN they said that even if it is after Easter, we can arrange it. God has led me this far....I pray I can go all the way, soon.

 

[Carrye]

I wish! No all is in, but all has to be approved, first. Then we can make an appointment to get married by the Father. THEN they said that even if it is after Easter, we can arrange it. God has led me this far....I pray I can go all the way, soon.

You should be able to enter the Church at Easter even if the decree of nullity hasn't been approved yet. Your husband's marital status doesn't affect your candidacy for entry.

I pray that God will give you peace in this, Dee. He has it all figured out ... even if He hasn't told you yet!

 

[marciadietrich]

You should be able to enter the Church at Easter even if the decree of nullity hasn't been approved yet. Your husband's marital status doesn't affect your candidacy for entry.

I pray that God will give you peace in this, Dee. He has it all figured out ... even if He hasn't told you yet!

Carrie,

Can you explain why it would make a difference whether it is the person entering or their spouse who has a former marriage that needs nullified? I didn't think it would make a difference as either way if the former marriage was not nullified you still have a person with a presumed former valid marriage who had remarried the candidate.

I know these issues are complex and certainly Dee should keep in contact with her priest who is her frontline advisor.

Marcia

 

[ukok]

Dee, i'm sorry to hear this

Praying for you

God bless

 

[Carrye]

Can you explain why it would make a difference whether it is the person entering or their spouse who has a former marriage that needs nullified? I didn't think it would make a difference as either way if the former marriage was not nullified you still have a person with a presumed former valid marriage who had remarried the candidate.

First, I am no canon lawyer. That said, I don't think it would matter whether it was the candidate or his/her spouse. Entry into the Church is not dependent upon marriage validity.

 

[AdJesumPerMariam]

I think it does because at this point, our marriage is not recognized by the Church, so we are living together "in adultry". We have been married going on 7 years...my husband is kinda having a problem with this at this moment.....

 

[Carrye]

I think it does because at this point, our marriage is not recognized by the Church, so we are living together "in adultry".

As I said, I'm no expert, but if his first marriage was invalid, then you are not living "in adultery". And if this is the case, then the decree of nullity will come through, and the marriage can be convalidated later.

My point in response to Marcia's question was simply that marital status is not an impediment to reception into the Church.

 

[marciadietrich]

Hi Carrie,

My understanding is what Dee has said, and I know the RCIA program in a different parish I thought about attending they sent out forms even before RCIA saying previous marriage of candidate or spouse and no annulment meant you weren't going to be able to join at Easter.

I hope it works out for Dee and others in this situation.

Marcia

 

[Carrye]

My understanding is what Dee has said, and I know the RCIA program in a different parish I thought about attending they sent out forms even before RCIA saying previous marriage of candidate or spouse and no annulment meant you weren't going to be able to join at Easter.

Well, it seems I stand corrected then.

 

[marciadietrich]

Hi Carrie,

Are you thinking of cases where the person is divorced but not remarried? Because that is a case where there person has no impediment to entering the Church as they are not in a marriage at all at the time despite being divorced. The only issue would be if they wanted to get married later then they would need to have the previous marriage nullified.

Marcia

 

[AdJesumPerMariam]

My husband is upset because he knows how much this means to me & my daughter to be received on Easter. We have done everything and this wait is not much fun! Anyway, my husband is having a hard time with them not accepting our marriage. I know I will not be in full communion with the Church until all is taken care of, I just am upset I was told we were told we could come in anytime we were ready, that we would not have to wait til next Easter.......

 

[marciadietrich]

Do you think it would help to let your daughter enter on Easter, then you would be able to later when the annulment comes through? I'm sure you were hoping to enter together, but didn't know if you had thought of doing it that way instead of having her wait as well.



Marcia

 

[AdJesumPerMariam]

My daughter is going through an annulment, too. She, also, is in the final step, but have not heard anything........................
I do think this will work out after all, though. There is at least one other person in our group going through the same thing, and she has not heard anything, either. It sounds like they will let us enter at a later date, if we need to.