Does anyone here write journals to their future spouse? This is something that I do and have heard of some other people doing. How do people feel about this?
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Journals to your future spouse
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Eagle_Wings
Just Your Ordinary Average Everyday Sane Psycho.
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Sounds interesting...I pray for my future husband, but have never though of writing journals to him...not really too sure how I feel about that...
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london boy
Welsh and German blood, English heart
i haven't written a journal to my future wife, but i've written a letter. i showed to my closest friends who were so touched by it that they cried......
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christiankate
Contributor
I haven't wrote a journal, but I have wrote him a letter. I think thats a nice thing to do, and I hope to give it to him on our wedding day.
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christiankate
Contributor
No, no, no, Please don't tear up the letter to her. If it made other women's hearts melt, it will definately make hers also. Very thoughtful on your part to write a letter to your future wife, Not alot of guys do that.
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invisiblebabe
He will restore the years the locust hath eaten
- Feb 12, 2004
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Not sure what to think, personally. When I was younger, I'd written a few (have no idea where all but one are now, and the one does not apply these days).
Regardless, with the things I have been through, I have deep issues with feeling others are not reciprocating my effort and energy in a relationship. So, on one hand, something like this may not be a good idea for me, since I have no guarantee my fiance would have done the same thing (and statistically, he probably has not). I do think it is a sweet and romantic idea though.
So, as I always seem to conclude.... it depends on the individual. whether or not it would be a good expression of love for your someday spouse... there doesn't seem to be one set answer.
Regardless, with the things I have been through, I have deep issues with feeling others are not reciprocating my effort and energy in a relationship. So, on one hand, something like this may not be a good idea for me, since I have no guarantee my fiance would have done the same thing (and statistically, he probably has not). I do think it is a sweet and romantic idea though.
So, as I always seem to conclude.... it depends on the individual. whether or not it would be a good expression of love for your someday spouse... there doesn't seem to be one set answer.
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- Mar 30, 2004
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I don't have a journal or a letter. Maybe I'll start, it's not too late. I have a purity ring to give my husband and I pray for him and our children.
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I figured it would be something I would pass on to him on our wedding day. I don't write all lovey dovey things in it but more thoughts that I have that I would normally share with someone. I don't have a very open relationship with my family so I don't have anyone to share all of this "special" things. THis is a way that some day I can share it with someone.
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Sascha Fitzpatrick
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I did - but as it's not all true now (and full of co-dependant, "I knew I couldn't live without you" rubbish), it's gone! 
To be honest, my FH wouldn't be interested in it. And he has some truth to that. It's not my past he's with me for - he's for my present and my future. What happened before him is of no consequence to him - he doesn't ask any questions about it, and doesn't feel he needs to know any of it. (Wake up call - most guys aren't as interested in lovey-dovey stuff as most of us girls are and will probably roll their eyes if they got a full journal of your feelings for him!)...
What I MIGHT do is just write him a note the day we leave for our destination wedding, and get his parents to pop it in his room for the morning of our wedding.
I feel this is better than writing to an 'unknown' future spouse - I know what means something to him with what I say, and don't write according to what I'D want to hear to know he loved me, but know what I need to say/do to ensure HE understands that I love him, and feels it...
My fear with people writing to an unknown spouse, is that they may be writing down what THEY'D need to hear to know they were loved and wanted, and not what that particular person needs to hear... I'd prefer to know his love language first, and respond that way to him...
Sasch
To be honest, my FH wouldn't be interested in it. And he has some truth to that. It's not my past he's with me for - he's for my present and my future. What happened before him is of no consequence to him - he doesn't ask any questions about it, and doesn't feel he needs to know any of it. (Wake up call - most guys aren't as interested in lovey-dovey stuff as most of us girls are and will probably roll their eyes if they got a full journal of your feelings for him!)...
What I MIGHT do is just write him a note the day we leave for our destination wedding, and get his parents to pop it in his room for the morning of our wedding.
I feel this is better than writing to an 'unknown' future spouse - I know what means something to him with what I say, and don't write according to what I'D want to hear to know he loved me, but know what I need to say/do to ensure HE understands that I love him, and feels it...
My fear with people writing to an unknown spouse, is that they may be writing down what THEY'D need to hear to know they were loved and wanted, and not what that particular person needs to hear... I'd prefer to know his love language first, and respond that way to him...
Sasch
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Spicy McHaggis
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christiankate said:
I'm in 100% agreement with Sketch. The letter should be for your spouse, not a tool for explaining yourself to others, or a means to impress others.
Once you show it to someone else, is it really for just that spouse any more?
"Here honey, I wrote this for you and three or four other girls that I felt the need to share it with, man were they impressed!!!"
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mixiejoeusa
Praise God With All Your Heart
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iklepac13 said:
I have to agree, I would feel bad knowing your friends had read it. marriage is about intimacy, and sharing a letter like that with your friends isn't starting off on the right foot.
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christiankate
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While I don't agree with passing a letter around and letting everyone read it, I don't think he should have to rip it up. If he wrote it just for his future wife and not to the other girls that are reading it and if it is what he wants to say to her, I think thats fine. I personally won't be having other people read my letter to my future husband, but thats just my decision. This wasn't meant to start a argument or anything like that just giving my 0.02
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reverie_maiden
The Lord is my Shepherd
I haven't wrote one...and I don't plan on it either. When I want him to know how I feel...I will take him by the hands, sit down next to him, look him deep in the eyes, and spill my heart to him. In my opinion it would mean more then.
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scraparcs
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As far as I'm concerned, to me, writing to a future spouse is more like writing to a concept and not to a person. I want to value a person, not what appears to me to be an idea of a marriage. I guess I'm just not a romantic until I've got someone in mind!
Besides, if I did write a letter to a future spouse, I can see it now. "I can't wait to fight over the checkbook and the dishes with you!"
Besides, if I did write a letter to a future spouse, I can see it now. "I can't wait to fight over the checkbook and the dishes with you!"
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london boy
Welsh and German blood, English heart
Just to explain, the letter was written with a particular person in my mind and given that God closed the door, I felt I should show it to my closest friends since it no longer had the same relevance any more. Why would I write to impress people?! I showed them so that they could see what was going on. Not many people knew of my feelings for this girl and so I showed them to put this chapter of my life to bed.
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Diane_Windsor
Senior Contributor
Nope, I do not keep a hubby journal, nor do I write letters to a future hubby.
1. I don't even know if I will be married in the first place-that is in God's Mighty Hands. At this point in time I sometimes doubt that I will ever meet my first boyfriend, let alone meeting my hubby! If I did write a hubby journal, and I never get married then how much time have I wasted?
2. I am really not much of a journal writer.
I could go on, but I won't.
I do pray
for my future hubby (if I even have one that is!)
I should have been in bed hours ago-my sleep schedule is going to be all messed up now-UGH!
diane
1. I don't even know if I will be married in the first place-that is in God's Mighty Hands. At this point in time I sometimes doubt that I will ever meet my first boyfriend, let alone meeting my hubby! If I did write a hubby journal, and I never get married then how much time have I wasted?
2. I am really not much of a journal writer.
I could go on, but I won't.
I do pray
for my future hubby (if I even have one that is!)I should have been in bed hours ago-my sleep schedule is going to be all messed up now-UGH!
diane
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