I've got a problem...

[Holmes]

I guess you could say I'm young enough so that my parents are a big influence on my life still. But I'm in the last term of my first year at University and I'm planning on moving off campus for next year (on campus costs about $800 a month). One of my friends (who is transferring over here next year) and I are planning on getting an apartment together.

The problem is, that my friend isn't exactly...male. And I'm pretty sure my parent's wouldn't approve of me living with a woman, even though we'd be getting a 2-bedroom apt.

Any advice on ways to reduce the tension between me and my parents? So far I've avoided the situation by not telling them anything, but they're gonna find out eventually, whether from me or not.

 

[atuck00]

I don't there is going to be a way to soften the blow... Be honest with them and allow them to be upset. The more you sit and hear them out, the more mature you will appear and the better they will probably handle the decision.

 

[ryanb6]

Why do you have to make them upset?

 

[Holmes]

Why do you have to make them upset?

Well, I don't have to. But that's the way they're gonna be. I can't afford to stay on campus, and she's the only person I know enough to have as a roommate that isn't transferring somewhere else in the country after this year, or lives on campus for free.

 

[ryanb6]

Well, I don't have to. But that's the way they're gonna be. I can't afford to stay on campus, and she's the only person I know enough to have as a roommate that isn't transferring somewhere else in the country after this year, or lives on campus for free.

I see well I guess it's best just to tell them as soon as possible or they will know that you kept it from them on purpose.

 

[Multi-Elis]

Simple solution: get other house mates.
You can sometimes find them on the internet. And it doesn't matter if you don't know them very well. You just advertise, then check up on their record, and then you sign an agreement between all of you about how you are going to behave: (example: no making noise after such and such an hour, no bringing in people from the outside without everyone else's agreement, who does the house work and when, and how clean. Any consistant violation of these commonly agreed rules means that you can democratically expel the person who breaks these rules.)

Friends of mine have already done it through the internet and were very satisfied. And as soon as there are 3 of you (or more) your parents don't need to worry so much.

 

[homeofmew]

=o. you are 18 do what you want.
However. I wouldn't do it if I was you ;O

 

[Shannie]

What if you found 2 rooms in a house with some other students for your friend and yourself? (No clue if this works where you go to school...in the city I'm in students frequently rent houses and then there will be 4 or 5 or more students in it). Or a bigger apartment I guess coudl work too? I find it sounds better to live with a couple boys and a couple girls than just two people together of opposite gender. Not sure if it would work or if it would help with your parents. I know my parents are more ok with that than if I lived with 1 boy. Plus my b/f wouldn't like that too much either lol

 

[HannahBanana]

If your parents are paying for your tuition, I'd try to find someone else to live with. If you're paying for your tuition, then your parents will just have to live with this decision of yours. After all, if they're not supporting you financially, then they have absolutely no say in what you do with your life and your money.