Is this a typical feeling?

[MamaPyratekk]

I love God, and since recommitting myself and my life to Him, I've felt very compelled to lead a very devout lifestyle. Long story short, sometimes when I'm in church I get this feeling inside. I look around at all the others who are worshiping and I wonder, "Can I ever be as in love with God as them?" and, "Am I really as devout as I believe, or am I just a fake?"

I know it should be easy to know if you're really a Christian and a true believer, and I really believe that I am. However, in the past I've flip-flopped from one thing to another trying to fill a void within myself. One month I was a vegan, the next I wasn't but instead I was fighting for human rights, the next I was doing something else, and so on and so forth. My husband even commented a few times that I never stuck with anything that I got passionate (or as he has called it before, obsessed) about. I worry that Christianity is just another stepping stone. I feel deep within my soul that it isn't, because I feel like He is the thing I've been trying to find this entire time. He is the only thing that can fill that void I had been trying to fill. But despite feeling this way, sometimes I just worry that I'm not "Christian enough".

Have any of you ever felt this way or feel this way currently? If so, any advice or kind words about what I can do to make this feeling subside? I feel it's the only thing holding me back from the life with Christ I truly long for.

God bless!

 

[LilLamb219]

Don't base your feelings on whether or not you're a true Christian! Base them instead on what Christ did on the cross for you so that you are a redeemed child! There is where you'll find that assurance you need.

It might be true that you have some obsessive compulsive tendencies, but that doesn't change anything that God has done to save you.

If you keep looking to yourself to see how you're doing as a Christian, you'll find out that you fail. We all fail. That's why we can't rely on ourselves! We can't turn ourselves into Christians!!! Only God can do that! Only He can make us Christian enough and He does that through means, such as His Word, Baptism and Holy Communion.

 

[dead2self]

Christians often doubt their salvation. The enemy is constantly out to cast doubt in our minds to reduce our effectiveness.

I suggest you spend time in the Word, time in prayer and time under good teaching. The more time you spend with God, the confident you will be. Remember, this is a relationship that must grow with time. Maturity in Christ does not come immediately.

If you do really doubt your salvation, look up Paul Washer on youtube and watch some of his sermons. You can also go to John Piper's site and search for "assurance". He has thousands of sermons, articles, papers etc. and has covered almost everything in the Christian life. The address is www .desiringgod. org (you have to type in in your browser without the spaces as I haven't potsed enough to be able to post links)

 

[heymikey80]

Yes, I've felt this way, and I feel this way more often than it may seem at worship.
Often we worship Whom we don't know, because ... well He's not here, and we haven't grasped His ways. It's just gonna be this way to some extent, until He returns.

I've been reading in some really tough books, and that often resolves my feelings. You have to pick what books would be "tough". I'd say if you've never read Romans like you were a Roman reading it for the first time -- that's really interesting. If you've done that, there are other books like Ecclesiastes that will assure you God knows what's up with this world. Psalms can do that, too.

In devotionals, I always recommend "Mere Christianity" first. CS Lewis has a number of other books that are good. At my level right now there's "Deserted By God" by Sinclair Ferguson. For more encouraging (!) books, there's a book called "Love Walked Among Us" that has blown that feeling away for me. You can sample a chapter online. There are old books like "The Imitation of Christ" that can push this feeling out. And an author, his name's Philip Yancey, with some really good books with unexpected subjects that, after you've read them, you really start to realize you're dealing with reality here. Brennan Manning can also be good; I've enjoyed his, "The Importance of Being Foolish".

If you're really into severe source research, there's also the Church Fathers. But they can get esoteric real fast. NT Wright is also good, granted his being one of the foremost living exegetes (finding in-text meanings) of the Biblical languages. Especially good are his smaller books on Jesus.

 

[Robinsegg]

I think it is a normal reaction to Satan (the accuser of the saints) trying to "knock you off-balance", telling you you're not as good as others. God doesn't expect you to "be like them". He wants you to be you, and to let Him help you be the best you possible!

When you feel this way, pray and ask God to protect you from the attack. Also, some good reading for such feelings is Romans 8 and Philippians 4.

Rachel

 

[suzybeezy]

We can all become discouraged, feeling like we don’t measure up. Hebrews 12:1 tells us "Let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us" We don't have to measure up to others, we persevere in the race especially designed "for us."

 

[Orchids]

I love to read the Beatitudes, it helps me understand Jesus, and get re-acquainted with Him all over again.