I've been told that love is a choice, but I'm not convinced. It doesn't seem that I can choose to love God. I spent months trying to love God through willpower and in the end it sure wasn't love. I also don't think that we can choose to fall in love or out of love with someone. I can't choose to love something that I truly have no desire to love. Am I wrong here?
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Is love a choice?
- Thread starter ColdTurkey
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ChildishFears
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- Aug 22, 2007
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I don't think love is a choice either, especially when it comes to loving God.
"We love Him because He first loved us..." 1 John 4
"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans
We don't choose to love God first, because we're sinners. But because of Christ's great sacrificail love, we can love Him in return.
"We love Him because He first loved us..." 1 John 4
"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans
We don't choose to love God first, because we're sinners. But because of Christ's great sacrificail love, we can love Him in return.
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AmaaandaB
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I believe that love is, at least in part, a choice.
For those that say love is not a choice, I'm curious what it is then. What do you say love is? (Not trying to be argumentative... I'm truly interested because I am curious that love isn't completely choice.)
For those that say love is not a choice, I'm curious what it is then. What do you say love is? (Not trying to be argumentative... I'm truly interested because I am curious that love isn't completely choice.)
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Loving monster
Abomination
Love is madness to expirence it is to invite suffering. Those you love will always fail you and most won't even aknowledge your love. Those who claim to love are more likely experiencing infatuation or some worse obession. Love is something that has to be built out of tireless brainwashing and a lot of hormones going off at the same time. Love is something cruel to keep us attached to people who we would otherwise discard after getting what we want outta them.
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ColdTurkey~
Please bear in mind that this is my personal opinion and others may have different opinions, okay? Personally, I believe that love between human beings is a choice, and here's why. Between human beings love is mostly ACTIONS--the way you act toward someone and the way they act toward you, and actions are things you can choose to do or not do. Even "attraction" is something that can be learned or at least influenced by the way you act toward someone and they way they act toward you!
BUT with G-d it is another thing entirely.
We are sinful and G-d is perfect. I think with G-d that we are incapable of loving Him but He loves US so a part of Him (the Holy Spirit) touches us and makes us want to love Him. We are imperfect at it, but with the Holy Spirit working in us, we do want to become more and more like G-d and love and worship Him more and more.
So based on what you've said it sounds like something is touching your heart to WANT to love G-d. I would say that as a human you're going to be imperfect at your attempts to do so but that G-d will love you anyway (perfectly) and that He'll keep working in your life as time goes on!
Please bear in mind that this is my personal opinion and others may have different opinions, okay? Personally, I believe that love between human beings is a choice, and here's why. Between human beings love is mostly ACTIONS--the way you act toward someone and the way they act toward you, and actions are things you can choose to do or not do. Even "attraction" is something that can be learned or at least influenced by the way you act toward someone and they way they act toward you!
BUT with G-d it is another thing entirely.
We are sinful and G-d is perfect. I think with G-d that we are incapable of loving Him but He loves US so a part of Him (the Holy Spirit) touches us and makes us want to love Him. We are imperfect at it, but with the Holy Spirit working in us, we do want to become more and more like G-d and love and worship Him more and more.
So based on what you've said it sounds like something is touching your heart to WANT to love G-d. I would say that as a human you're going to be imperfect at your attempts to do so but that G-d will love you anyway (perfectly) and that He'll keep working in your life as time goes on!
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I agree with what has been said... we can't choose to feel, but we can choose to act. And, really, that is what love is.
Our feelings depend on so many things.. our health, how much sleep we have had, our stress levels....
But, if we decide to show love, we can do so however we feel, because we want to make the other happy, not because we have some warm fuzzy feeling towards them.. it is a choice, day by day and minut by minute.
And loving God is, in many waya the same. It is easy to 'feel' that we love Him when everything is going well, in big meetings, in the quiet times when we hear His voice and feel His presence. But to truly love Him is to act in sacrificial obedience when it is far from what we 'want' to do.
The Bible says:
That is loving God... rejoicing in Him despite our circumstances.. it isn't something you 'feel', it is active and by choice.
And we can't do it without His grace.
Our feelings depend on so many things.. our health, how much sleep we have had, our stress levels....
But, if we decide to show love, we can do so however we feel, because we want to make the other happy, not because we have some warm fuzzy feeling towards them.. it is a choice, day by day and minut by minute.
And loving God is, in many waya the same. It is easy to 'feel' that we love Him when everything is going well, in big meetings, in the quiet times when we hear His voice and feel His presence. But to truly love Him is to act in sacrificial obedience when it is far from what we 'want' to do.
The Bible says:
That is loving God... rejoicing in Him despite our circumstances.. it isn't something you 'feel', it is active and by choice.
And we can't do it without His grace.
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Many people say love is strictly a choice, not a feeling. For me it seems like both, depending on the circumstances.
There is one thing I just don't get.
When you love, say, your spouse or S.O., what is that gripping, tugging, aching feeling you get in your heart when you miss them, or when they're gone for a long period of time, or when they die? That feeling is definitely NOT a choice. You can't say that the feelings of missing someone when they're gone is a choice. You can't call it lust either. What is it then? Isn't that some form of love? You definitely don't feel that way for anyone else, or else you could just go ahead and marry anyone and force yourself to get emotionally attached. I don't think all emotional attachment is lust either. so what is this?
I can understand how one aspect of love can be a choice too. It is carried out by our actions - whether our minds want to do it or not. I can explain but I think others can do it well LOL.
There is one thing I just don't get.
When you love, say, your spouse or S.O., what is that gripping, tugging, aching feeling you get in your heart when you miss them, or when they're gone for a long period of time, or when they die? That feeling is definitely NOT a choice. You can't say that the feelings of missing someone when they're gone is a choice. You can't call it lust either. What is it then? Isn't that some form of love? You definitely don't feel that way for anyone else, or else you could just go ahead and marry anyone and force yourself to get emotionally attached. I don't think all emotional attachment is lust either. so what is this?
I can understand how one aspect of love can be a choice too. It is carried out by our actions - whether our minds want to do it or not. I can explain but I think others can do it well LOL.
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Ariel
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Love is active, not passive. Most often it is a choice.
Having made that choice, love acts. It puts feet to words, and actions to thoughts. How to fall in love with someone? Serve them. Do something kind for them.
The Lord once said to me to look for the broken ones, the hurt ones, the ones nobody else loved. I have found that as I serve these, it is easy to love them. I choose to serve, and love follows.
God loves you, He put that love to action. He is love. It is from this same undeserved love that we have love to give others, Romans 5:5 "for the love of God is poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who is given to us." That love which was given grows by our actions.
So yes, I believe that most often love is a choice.
Having made that choice, love acts. It puts feet to words, and actions to thoughts. How to fall in love with someone? Serve them. Do something kind for them.
The Lord once said to me to look for the broken ones, the hurt ones, the ones nobody else loved. I have found that as I serve these, it is easy to love them. I choose to serve, and love follows.
God loves you, He put that love to action. He is love. It is from this same undeserved love that we have love to give others, Romans 5:5 "for the love of God is poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who is given to us." That love which was given grows by our actions.
So yes, I believe that most often love is a choice.
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