Is it wrong?

[Mnse87]

Do you think its wrong for a girl to ask a guy out?
(I'm not thinking of asking a guy out. I was only wondering...)

Its just that I've been raised in w/ parents that say a man should be the one that leads the house hold. I grew up to be very old fashioned in every sense of the word.

 

[covenantwmn]

I'm not sure, on the one hand, I am old-fashioned too and like the guys to do the asking, but when you read about Ruth and Boaz, she really went for it. I think it probably depends on the guy and the gal. Sheesh, things get so difficult, the guys are sometimes too scared to ask, but then again, some guys think you're too forward if you ask, but you could die waiting too, lol. I know the LORD will lead you. God bless.
in Him, Leslie

 

[Marie D]

I agree that the man should lead the household, that's Biblical, but I don't think that has anything to do with who asks who out. You only have to submit to a man when you're married to him.

 

[Sketcher]

No, what's wrong is if the guy typically depends on the girl to take the first step. He needs to grow a pair and take responsibility as well as the lead. If the girl beats him to the asking out, no big deal. The pattern is far more telling than a one time event.

 

[findinghope06]

i dont think its wrong, but im very old fashion when it comes to things like that. i want to look back and say "yah it was so cute how my husband asked me out for the first time" i think its taken too lightly now adays and ppl just say "hey wanna go out?" ...i want it to be special. like he planned it and he asked for advice and guidance about it.

my best guy friend came and asked me for advice on how to ask out his current girlfriend. i want the guy to do that for me someday..and ill wait til someone does

but there is nothing wrong with it by any means. if i really felt God telling me to make the first move, i would. but until i hear from God, i will let the guy come to me!

 

[FlatpickingJD]

I'm not sure, on the one hand, I am old-fashioned too and like the guys to do the asking, but when you read about Ruth and Boaz, she really went for it. I think it probably depends on the guy and the gal. Sheesh, things get so difficult, the guys are sometimes too scared to ask, but then again, some guys think you're too forward if you ask, but you could die waiting too, lol. I know the LORD will lead you. God bless.
in Him, Leslie

I absolutely agree with this. Let me add that often (and I speak from personal experience) the guy is pretty clueless about whether the gal has an interest in him and is afraid to ask her out in case he's misread things. In other words, I don't think it's wrong for the woman to ask the guy out. It's only a problem if she is the one doing all the asking after the first time (or 2), but that's a separate question: is he interested in me?

 

[awashinlove]

I know the LORD will lead you.

 

[Peter_in_Christ]

When a man asks it does show initiative on his side to take the lead and is willing vulnerable to taking the plung with the possiblity of fear of rejection in mind.

Is it worth taking risk? Yes, if you are very interested!

With the Lady giving some hints that she is interested in fine, but don't compromise on your modesty and character trying to get his attention.

I'm old fashioned too, like Christ is the Bridegroom and we the church are His bride...

Peter

 

[strengthinweakness]

I wouldn't say that it's "wrong" for a woman to ask a man out (to say that would, in my opinion, tread perilously close to legalism), but as a Christian man, I prefer to do the asking. I think that it fits the Biblical order well. Man was created first (not in order of importance though ), and then woman was created, as his helpmate. In this light, I think that it is generally best when a man takes the first step and the initiative to express interest in a woman. There may be invidual cases, because of personality, temperament, ect. where a man may not step forward first and take the initiative, and I wouldn't say that it would be a definite "wrong" for the woman to do so. Generally speaking though, I think it is best for a Christian man to take the first step to ask a woman out and/or express romantic interest in her, and I prefer to do so myself.

 

[Blank123]

There's nothing Biblically wrong with asking a guy out, you just need to make sure that if you do ask someone out that he's a good match for you. Be careful of being unequally yoked.

Personally though I would prefer the guy asking me out rather than the other way around. I'm just rather old fashioned in that sense I suppose

 

[~HopeFloats~]

I say go for it! and Good Luck!

I have also heard guys enjoy when girls ask them out so YOU GO GIRL!

 

[strengthinweakness]

It's interesting-- when I was a non-believer, I loved it when women took the first step and asked me out. I actually find it a turn-off now though. I don't think that it's morally wrong for a woman to ask a man out, but as a Christian man is supposed to lead, protect, and provide for his wife and family, I feel personally that it would set the wrong tone, for me, for a possible future if a woman asked me out first, rather than allowing me to take the initiative to ask her out myself.

 

[~HopeFloats~]

It's interesting-- when I was a non-believer, I loved it when women took the first step and asked me out. I actually find it a turn-off now though. I don't think that it's morally wrong for a woman to ask a man out, but as a Christian man is supposed to lead, protect, and provide for his wife and family, I feel personally that it would set the wrong tone, for me, for a possible future if a woman asked me out first, rather than allowing me to take the initiative to ask her out myself.

Interesting...

 

[sweetlambofgod]

no its not wrong, but I would prefer the guy to ask

 

[Moluku]

Wouldn't say it's wrong, but not commonly practiced or at least noticed in our society. I think girls have either become more bold or impatient in waiting for a guy to make his move. And so some girls are now doing the asking. I've asked a guy or two out before, but it does create a warm fuzzy feeling in me when I'm asked.

 

[fishstix]

Do you think its wrong for a girl to ask a guy out?
(not that I'm considering on doing so)

Its just that I've been raised in w/ parents that say a man should be the one that leads the house hold.

No, I don't think that it is wrong for a girl to ask a guy out. If a woman is comfortable asking a man out, she should feel free to do so. The Bible gives us an example of a Godly woman who not only asked a man out, but took the lead in proposing marriage to him. If a woman isn't comfortable asking a man out though, then she shouldn't feel pressured to. It's up to each individual to decide what they are going to do.

 

[JPPT1974]

No, I don't think that it is wrong for a girl to ask a guy out. If a woman is comfortable asking a man out, she should feel free to do so. The Bible gives us an example of a Godly woman who not only asked a man out, but took the lead in proposing marriage to him. If a woman isn't comfortable asking a man out though, then she shouldn't feel pressured to. It's up to each individual to decide what they are going to do.

No wonder I don't ask a man out
Plus also, men asking women out is the old-fashioned way of doing things IMO.

 

[eatenbylocusts]

I can't imagine asking a guy out for a first date. Even on the internet I've only initiated a conversation a few times and most of those times were because my subscription was going to expire. I have found that for the few I did initiate my return was extremely low. I think there must've been a reason why they didn't communicate with me first.

 

[Irascible]

The term "old fashioned" is getting thrown around a lot. That's nice. I happened to be very old fashioned. But has anyone taken a serious look around a typical metropolitan area church lately?

If a woman wants to be treated with old fashioned dignity then she needs to talk, act and dress like an old fashioned lady with dignity. Too many of them walk around looking like Britney Spears. I'm not saying the ladies here are that way. But the ladies here that are old fashioned are the exception. So unfortunately the old rules of conduct have also become the exception, at least in these parts.

 

[RooiWillie]

The guy should be the hunter. If he's too scared to do the hunting, then he shouldn't be considering relationships, but rather find his manhood in God first. Only when you've find your manhood in Christ are you ready to hunt.

Being scared of rejection has nothing to do with it - you can be all the man God intended you to be and your heart will still pump in your throat when you ask the girl out - it's what makes relationships so amazing!

Having said that, this is also true:

if i really felt God telling me to make the first move, i would. but until i hear from God, i will let the guy come to me!