Is It Weird to Pray Before You Eat on a Date?

[cinderboard]

Dating.. Dinner.. Grace?

This question has always been a huge burden to me, and it seems so simple. When you go out on a first date with someone, a nice Christian woman, at a restaurant, do you pause and say grace after the food is brought to you?

For some background information, I live alone, I don't say grace at my meals. I come from a Christian family growing up, but we never said grace at meals. It's just not something I'm used to doing. When out on a first date, I want to make a good first impression, so that leads me to believe that I should. But you don't see grace being said a lot in a public place like that. And secondly, I feel like I'm misleading her because I don't say grace myself and I wasn't brought up in a home that did. Which also leads to the secondary problem, I don't really know what to say for grace.

As a relationship moves forward, maybe you have dinner at one of your places, it's quiet and more private, I can understand grace being said there. Definitely as you move a lot forward, marriage, family, etc. I can see where sitting down at the dinner table and saying grace would be important.

But on a first date? How important is that?

 

[CounselorForChrist]

Some would say we shouldn't be afraid to say grace in public. But I don't care to. I've never really said grace anyways as a christian. Mainly because I forget to. Overall its not like God will send me to hell for not saying grace. Usually in my prayer before bed I thank God for everything that day. So to me it kind of evens out. However if my soon to be wife requires grace before we eat I will do it.

As for what to say. Just like with praying there is no real specific thing. Most people that say grace (that I've met) say something short and simple like "Dear Lord we thank you for the meal we are about to eat, amen!" or "Bless this meal we are about to eat, amen!".

I don't think its needed to impress a date. If they think it is then they may not be your type. I know they wouldn't be mine.

 

[somethingBEAUTIFUL]

Don't fake it if you normally don't do it yourself- and you said you didn't. My boyfriend and I pray over meals around 50% of the time. He's a little self conscious of doing it in public, and I respect that. I don't pray over my own meals all of the time anyway. When he does pray for us, it's short and sweet.

 

[cinderboard]

This is comforting, thanks for your replies.

Like xfreakazoidx said, if it's really needed to impress a date, then she's not my type. I guess I was just concerned at how seriously someone would take me as being a Christian person, if I didn't pray at meals.

But these replies have helped. Thanks

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

My husband and I said grace together sometimes when we were dating, but not all the time. I don't think that it is wrong if you do not feel comfortable saying grace on a first date. You can always thank God privately in your mind.

 

[NiobiumTragedy]

I say no. You don't typically do it normally so you're essentially using it as a tool to impress her while misrepresenting yourself.

Then comes the "why don't you ever say grace before you eat like you did on the first date?" It's all downhill from there.

 

[LinkH]

This is comforting, thanks for your replies.

Like xfreakazoidx said, if it's really needed to impress a date, then she's not my type. I guess I was just concerned at how seriously someone would take me as being a Christian person, if I didn't pray at meals.

But these replies have helped. Thanks

I think both of those things are related. If she doesn't take you seriously as a Christian, and she's a serious Christian, you could hurt yourself on a first date.

The real question is whether you should give thanks for the food before you eat. Jesus "Blessed and brake" the loaves. The Jews had a custom of blessing God, who brings forth bread from the earth before they ate. Paul said of food 'for which I give thanks.' So it is Biblical to give thanks for the food.

Why don't you start giving thanks before you eat at home so you won't feel insincere when you are out on a date?

I did have a habit of praying before I ate. I also notice my wife would pray before leaving the house when I went to pick her up when we were first seeing each other and various other times. That was the way she lived her life. It wasn't just something done to impress me, but it did anyway. It's good to pray more than to pray less, and I've adapted some of her prayer habits, like praying before we go anywhere in the car. In her city the way the traffic behaves, I can see why an atheist would pray before cranking the car.

 

[dayhiker]

I usually say grace when out to eat. Just this week I had two dates, a lady who is has a Christian background and Jewish lady. I initiated saying grace with both ladies.

If you don't say grace by yourself, then I'd not say grace with a date. If you think you should say grace, then start saying it by yourself at home for a while before saying grace on a date.

 

[Inkachu]

It's very important to me. I was raised in a home where you never started a meal without saying thanks, and that includes restaurants. Frankly, I'd think it was a little odd if a Christian couple - even on a first date - didn't think to stop and say grace first. Sure, it might be an awkward little moment; do you hold hands? do you say it silently? But sheesh, those are minor things that you can laugh off as you work it out together

 

[seashale76]

Ah- I sense underlying guilt that you don't say grace regularly over your meals. I grew up doing this, it is mandatory at all church events, but I find myself not doing it when left to my own devices. I feel guilty too. Perhaps you and I just need to get into the habit of saying grace regularly. Your dilemma will then be solved if you ever go on dates. I wouldn't just do it to impress others though- that's kind of not the point.

 

[CounselorForChrist]

I think both of those things are related. If she doesn't take you seriously as a Christian, and she's a serious Christian, you could hurt yourself on a first date.

However if thats her only concern about you, then I'd find someone else. There are bigger concerns about a christian spouse she should be having. Thats just me though. I never cared for a woman who thinks so high of herself because shes so holy and is quick to point out when your not. That just shows ego which in itself is a sin.

To be fair now that I am married, despite my brain injury I try to pray for my food, even if quietly. Just as I try to do devotions every morning with the wife. Granted in my case as stated I forget things or I don't feel good and...well forget lol. But she helps me with it all.

 

[hungyenwap]

Not confident to come to dinner: D

 

[fdsfndls]

'grace' is just an added to version of blessing food. it's a tradition. blessing food is different.
it can turn off non-christians which is my first concern. I'd do it to humour others, but you have to question things sometimes. Any christian who is more interested in 'pleasing God' or doing things at others expense regardless, bothers me anyway.