Is it a sin live with your fiancee/girlfriend?

[ironford]

I know its a sin to have sex but if your not having sex is it a sin?

 

[ProScribe]

Having sex itself is not a sin but over-indulging (pornography) is.

. . .

 

[JoabAnias]

I know its a sin to have sex but if your not having sex is it a sin?

Here are some threads and resources where the question has been addressed:

Is cohabitation an impediment to marriage?
What is the Church's teaching on cohabitation?
Is marriage doomed by cohabitation?
The Verdict on Cohabitation vs. Marriage
Sin to live with girlfriend?
http://marriageandfamilies.byu.edu/i...abitation.aspx

 

[JoabAnias]

Having sex itself is not a sin but over-indulging (pornography) is.

. . .

He is speaking of his girlfriend. Not his wife.

 

[namericanboy]

I always loved these verses from Thessalonians:

18 In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
19 Quench not the Spirit.
20 Despise not prophesyings.
21 Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.
22 Abstain from all appearance of evil.
23 And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.
24 Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.
25 Brethren, pray for us.
26 Greet all the brethren with an holy kiss.
27 I charge you by the Lord that this epistle be read unto all the holy brethren.
28 The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you. Amen.

 

[JoabAnias]

I always loved these verses from Thessalonians:

18 In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
19 Quench not the Spirit.
20 Despise not prophesyings.
21 Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.
22 Abstain from all appearance of evil.
23 And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.
24 Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.
25 Brethren, pray for us.
26 Greet all the brethren with an holy kiss.
27 I charge you by the Lord that this epistle be read unto all the holy brethren.
28 The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you. Amen.

4:3-9 is very good too:

1Th 4:3 For this is the will of God, your sanctification: That you should abstain from fornication:
1Th 4:4 That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour,
1Th 4:5 Not in the passion of lust, like the Gentiles that know not God:
1Th 4:6 And that no man overreach nor circumvent his brother in business: because the Lord is the avenger of all these things, as we have told you before and have testified.
1Th 4:7 For God hath not called us unto uncleanness, but unto sanctification.
1Th 4:8 Therefore, he that despiseth these things, despiseth not man, but God, who also hath given his holy Spirit in us.
1Th 4:9 But as touching the charity of brotherhood, we have no need to write to you: for yourselves have learned of God to love one another.

 

[copesandcandles]

Certainly not if you are living together completely chastely. It might not be the best idea, though, when you consider the factors of temptation, and that apart from sex you won't be able to explore each other any more emotionally when you're married. It might make the marriage more difficult in the sense that you'll expect living together as a married couple will be so much more different practically than living together as boyfriend and girlfriend - it won't.

I mean, the above is assuming you intend to marry this girl. If you don't, why would bother moving in with her. I'm sure she's lovely, but if you don't marriage there, then why make it more serious than necessary?

You also need to take into account that people may assume that, as a couple living together, you are sleeping together. By sharing the same roof do you think you would be causing scandal or, perhaps worse, confirming other peoples' misguided opinions on sex from their incorrect assumption that you must be having sex with each other.

Just maybe a few things to think about.

 

[JoabAnias]

In addition to the sources quoted above, I'd also recommend reading what the CCC says about trial marriage:

Other offenses against the dignity of marriage

2390 In a so-called free union, a man and a woman refuse to give juridical and public form to a liaison involving sexual intimacy.
The expression "free union" is fallacious: what can "union" mean when the partners make no commitment to one another, each exhibiting a lack of trust in the other, in himself, or in the future?
The expression covers a number of different situations: concubinage, rejection of marriage as such, or inability to make long-term commitments.183 All these situations offend against the dignity of marriage; they destroy the very idea of the family; they weaken the sense of fidelity. They are contrary to the moral law. The sexual act must take place exclusively within marriage. Outside of marriage it always constitutes a grave sin and excludes one from sacramental communion.

2391 Some today claim a "right to a trial marriage" where there is an intention of getting married later. However firm the purpose of those who engage in premature sexual relations may be, "the fact is that such liaisons can scarcely ensure mutual sincerity and fidelity in a relationship between a man and a woman, nor, especially, can they protect it from inconstancy of desires or whim."184 Carnal union is morally legitimate only when a definitive community of life between a man and woman has been established. Human love does not tolerate "trial marriages." It demands a total and definitive gift of persons to one another.185

 

[Rhamiel]

it is putting yourself and her into more temptation, and it might give the apperance of sin
so I will say it is generaly a bad idea, but there might be times when it is needed,
did one of you loose a home? do you have to move to a new city for a job and you will be getting married in 2 or 3 months?

 

[CruciFixed]

Before I was Christian I moved in with my husband while he was still my boyfriend. The only way we could continue to "date" was to live together since
A: My home was in Louisiana his was in Ohio
B: My home was lost in Katrina

Also we weren't Christian and also we were far more tempted.....maybe continuous prayer can keep the two of you out of the bedroom (intimately)?
Still sexually speaking he's the only one I've ever been with.
Marriage hasn't changed anything for us except now we have a baby which we conceived after marriage.

 

[Rois]

not a sin, but maybe not ideal