Is being asexual a sin?

BjorkIsCool · Feb 12, 2009

Could a women who is not sexually attracted to anything have sex with a man and enjoy the actual act of sex but yet still always remaining non-sexually attracted to everything? A case of an asexual who enjoys sex.

nhisname · Feb 12, 2009

Replikation said:
Because I think I may be. I just feel no sexual attraction to any other person, and it's always been this way. The only thing I need out of a relationship is companionship.

So is this in some way a sin? People tell me it isn't natural, but does God approve? I consider myself a Christian, but nobody knows about this, and I'm afraid if I come out it may not be accepted by my family and friends.

I think a lot of people would be better off if they felt as you do ...there is nothing wrong with this.

1 Cor. 7-1,2
Now for the matters you wrote about:
It is good for a man not to marry. But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.

Replikation · Feb 13, 2009

Thank you so much for all of your replies. I know that the bible talks about man and woman being meant for each other, so I wanted some people's views on the issue.

So far my experience with telling other people about this has been met with awkwardness and confusion. I even once had someone ask me, "So you're basically heartless then?". This made me very sad, because I still feel love towards many other people, just apparently not in the same way as most others do.

Again, thank you for the advice and support. I appreciate it.

homewardbound · Feb 14, 2009

Replikation said:
Thank you so much for all of your replies. I know that the bible talks about man and woman being meant for each other, so I wanted some people's views on the issue.

So far my experience with telling other people about this has been met with awkwardness and confusion. I even once had someone ask me, "So you're basically heartless then?". This made me very sad, because I still feel love towards many other people, just apparently not in the same way as most others do.

Again, thank you for the advice and support. I appreciate it.

The bible speaks of man and woman being made for each other, but I don't interpret that to mean "meant" for each other. Know what I mean?

It's sad that you're being treated this way. I can't help but wonder if you would be receiving the same treatment if you were a female. Maybe some decidedly single female posters here have some insight.

Regardless, I say "Go in peace". You're just fine.

Ave Maria · Feb 14, 2009

I believe that being asexual would be a gift from God. Let's see what the Bible says:

1 Corinthians 7:1 NIV Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry.

For those who don't like the NIV, here is the ESV:

1 Corinthians 7:1 ESV Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: "It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman."

As you can see, the Bible clearly says that it is a good thing to be celibate. Asexuals are naturally celibate.

daydreamergurl15 · Feb 14, 2009

BjorkIsCool said:
Could a women who is not sexually attracted to anything have sex with a man and enjoy the actual act of sex but yet still always remaining non-sexually attracted to everything? A case of an asexual who enjoys sex.

As long as that woman is married (always the assumption). I'm sure if the woman is enjoying sex, she is no longer asexual.

LJSGM · Feb 14, 2009

Yes, you should tell your doctor because it could be an indicator of an health issue/ hormonal problem.

It would only be a sin if you married someone knowing that they need a sexual relationship and knowing that you couldn't give it.

david_x · Feb 14, 2009

daydreamergurl15 said:
As long as that woman is married (always the assumption). I'm sure if the woman is enjoying sex, she is no longer asexual.

I believe the issues is sexual attraction, prepubescents can get pleasure from sex because that is how the human body is set up but that does not mean that they are sexually attracted or will suddenly become sexually attracted after said act.

daydreamergurl15 · Feb 14, 2009

david_x said:
I believe the issues is sexual attraction, prepubescents can get pleasure from sex because that is how the human body is set up but that does not mean that they are sexually attracted or will suddenly become sexually attracted after said act.

I answered it the way I did because of this part:

"Could a women who is not sexually attracted to anything have sex with a man and enjoy the actual act of sex but yet still always remaining non-sexually attracted to everything?"

I figured if someone is enjoying the sex, they can no longer be considered asexual. I know the saying was theoretically and BjorkIsCool is posing a question and I did not answer it as such. I was just being a smart elect. I find it interesting that the person is enjoying the sex.

Which leads me to think, assuming the couple is married, if the woman is asexual, hopefully her husband is also asexual otherwise that's going to cause a problem in the relationship. But if they are having sex, then I can't see the problem in that area.

The Inquisitor · Feb 15, 2009

I have read and heard from pastors that asexuality can be considered closet homosexuality. Anyone not being sexually attracted to a person of the opposite sex may be suppressing deviant homosexual emotions aka homosexophaelia. You might want to look for the right person in your life before giving into sin. God wants us all to reproduce. Those who choose to withdraw, ie. priests, are excused because they are "in love with" Jesus. But if you're not a clergyman, you may be on the verge of committing homosexuality, even if it's unvoluntary.

david_x · Feb 15, 2009

The Inquisitor said:
I have read and heard from pastors that asexuality can be considered closet homosexuality. Anyone not being sexually attracted to a person of the opposite sex may be suppressing deviant homosexual emotions aka homosexophaelia. You might want to look for the right person in your life before giving into sin. God wants us all to reproduce. Those who choose to withdraw, ie. priests, are excused because they are "in love with" Jesus. But if you're not a clergyman, you may be on the verge of committing homosexuality, even if it's unvoluntary.

In a few cases perhaps...

However, a pastor should be married. No one else is under any obligation, if they can't resist they should get married otherwise they should stay single and dedicated fully to the Lord.

Replikation · Feb 16, 2009

The Inquisitor said:
I have read and heard from pastors that asexuality can be considered closet homosexuality. Anyone not being sexually attracted to a person of the opposite sex may be suppressing deviant homosexual emotions aka homosexophaelia. You might want to look for the right person in your life before giving into sin. God wants us all to reproduce. Those who choose to withdraw, ie. priests, are excused because they are "in love with" Jesus. But if you're not a clergyman, you may be on the verge of committing homosexuality, even if it's unvoluntary.

To be honest, that just doesn't really sound true at all, at least in my case. I think that could be right for a few, but to say that asexuality is the same as closet homosexuality just isn't correct.

I've found that when I tell people about it, most just sort of pass it off as if I'm going through a phase and will eventually break out of it, as if it's just so strange to them that they don't actually consider that I could truly be asexual.

In fact, when I was a younger teenager, I wondered about the same thing that pastor is referring to. I figured since I wasn't attracted to girls, it just made sense that I should be attracted to boys, even though I've never felt that feeling toward anyone. I've not even known that feeling, but I'd never heard of asexuality, and anyone I tried to talk to about it said to just wait it out, and eventually I'd get better (As if it was a sickness).

And basically while I was a teenager, I was searching for my sexuality, hoping that I'd find it, but it just never happened. Eventually I realized that it wouldn't, and now I feel fine. So during all of those years of actually searching (among both genders) for someone I'd be sexually attracted to, I'm fairly certain I would have solved this so called "problem".

I don't mean offense toward you or the pastor you're referring to, but I don't believe what he says is correct.

homewardbound · Feb 17, 2009

The Inquisitor said:
I have read and heard from pastors that asexuality can be considered closet homosexuality. Anyone not being sexually attracted to a person of the opposite sex may be suppressing deviant homosexual emotions aka homosexophaelia. You might want to look for the right person in your life before giving into sin. God wants us all to reproduce. Those who choose to withdraw, ie. priests, are excused because they are "in love with" Jesus. But if you're not a clergyman, you may be on the verge of committing homosexuality, even if it's unvoluntary.

I would question the credibility of any pastor who would make such a claim. As much as I detest the word 'homophobic', this is one instance when it might actually apply.

God gave us the ability to reproduce, but if he intended for everyone to do so, no one would be be "excused".

dies-l · Feb 17, 2009

I agree with most of the others. There is nothing immoral about asexuality. I would encourage you to read 1 Cor. 7 to see Paul's thoughts on the matter and how celibacy can actually increase your ability to serve God with all of your being. That being said, I am married, and I enjoy it, but I do believe that, as Paul has said, God intends some of us to marry and some of us to devote our lives to celibacy, prayer, and meditation. Perhaps, if you truly are a asexual, this is God's blessing on you to allow you to fully embrace a life of celibacy.

Is being asexual a sin?

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