Hi everyone, I've being going through some things in my marriage, but this is more focused on my in-laws. I've had an okay relationship with my in-laws throughout the 2 year marriage to my husband. It's difficult since they live in the first floor flat of our house (my husband bought it before we married).
During some incidents between my husband and I, he called my parents and my husband's dad bad mouthed me to my dad. My dad did not tell me everything the man said, but the jist of it was that I was disrespectful. My father-in-law does not speak to me. He barely says "hi" sometimes. He is one of the most anti-social people I know. My mother-in-law and I were okay until something happened and she likes to give me advice by telling me her experience. I don't mind but every time I get the feeling she's telling me everything is my fault. So I pulled away from my in-laws, limiting myself to talking to being around on holidays (or family events when I am made aware of them) and since they watch my son two days out of the week, those days as well. A month ago my husband moved out for a few days and the first day he decided to go down to them. I had class the next day and he usually watches our son, but I knew it wasn't going to happen so I called his mom to see if she would watch him the day of my class and the other days they usually watch him and she said "no". Apparently my husband told her to say this. I am just wondering...is this normal with in-laws? Am I expected to be okay with this? I feel as though they are enabling their son and it's not a good thing. I just don't know what is a "normal" or "healthy" in law relationship because I don't think I have one. I picked my son up from my father-in-law and when he answered the door he did not say a word to me. He opened the door and walked away...I had to ask him things and then left. I'm sucking it all up right now.
During some incidents between my husband and I, he called my parents and my husband's dad bad mouthed me to my dad. My dad did not tell me everything the man said, but the jist of it was that I was disrespectful. My father-in-law does not speak to me. He barely says "hi" sometimes. He is one of the most anti-social people I know. My mother-in-law and I were okay until something happened and she likes to give me advice by telling me her experience. I don't mind but every time I get the feeling she's telling me everything is my fault. So I pulled away from my in-laws, limiting myself to talking to being around on holidays (or family events when I am made aware of them) and since they watch my son two days out of the week, those days as well. A month ago my husband moved out for a few days and the first day he decided to go down to them. I had class the next day and he usually watches our son, but I knew it wasn't going to happen so I called his mom to see if she would watch him the day of my class and the other days they usually watch him and she said "no". Apparently my husband told her to say this. I am just wondering...is this normal with in-laws? Am I expected to be okay with this? I feel as though they are enabling their son and it's not a good thing. I just don't know what is a "normal" or "healthy" in law relationship because I don't think I have one. I picked my son up from my father-in-law and when he answered the door he did not say a word to me. He opened the door and walked away...I had to ask him things and then left. I'm sucking it all up right now.
