I'm so depressed right now

[katylees]

Hey. Background - I'm 20, at uni in 2nd year studying music. Diagnosed with depression just over a year ago. I also self harm.

These last few days i've been so low. I've actually been scared of myself for the first time. I sat the other night in my room in the dark ..next thing i knew i was cutting. I couldn't feel it, although i felt relaxed. Mycutting is getting worse and so is my depression i think. I wanted to give up totally the other day ..i still do. I don't like being here, i'm so tired of being tired of everything. Nothing seems fun any more, when i go to sleep i wish i could stay asleep.

 

[Daysoni]

I remember feeling the same way not to long ago. It was scary. I just kept asking God why why am I still here and how much more broken do I have to be? The truth for me was that untill I fully surrendered to God I was going to keep breaking. It is by your confession of mouth that you have already started your healing. It may be hard to see or wait for but God does do his best work when we are broken. Just trust and lean on him. I will keep you in my prayers......

 

[katylees]

Thank you so much. It all seems so worthless right now. I've had enough of everything

 

[timlamb]

Katylees, see your doctor please!! I have an imballance and have been on meds for years. But I know from experiance that the closer you draw to God, the more you surrender to Jesus, the less this will aflict you. Joy does await, never loose patience with the Lord. In His time, beautiful things happen. You will recieve blessings, they may not be what you expect, but they will happen. Surrender this to God and there will be newness like spring. Trust, and have faith in God's Holy Word, don't believe your feelings, believe the bible.
The best thing for depression is praise, tell someone thank you, tell someone you love them, we all need to here that. Praise God and rejoice, for the kingdom of heaven is yours for the asking.
timlamb

 

[Kairos]

Hi, katylees... have you seen a counselor about this? If not, I think it's a good idea that you do. I will keep you in my prayers and please, feel free to PM me at anytime. God bless and keep you in His care.

 

[reverie_maiden]

Hey. Background - I'm 20, at uni in 2nd year studying music. Diagnosed with depression just over a year ago. I also self harm.

These last few days i've been so low. I've actually been scared of myself for the first time. I sat the other night in my room in the dark ..next thing i knew i was cutting. I couldn't feel it, although i felt relaxed. Mycutting is getting worse and so is my depression i think. I wanted to give up totally the other day ..i still do. I don't like being here, i'm so tired of being tired of everything. Nothing seems fun any more, when i go to sleep i wish i could stay asleep.

*hugs and cries too* I am so lonely, depressed, and empty feeling right now. If you want to talk, I would be more than happy to send PMs back and forth.

 

[melaniew]

aww hunny i know u can get through it. I would be soo hurt if ya Took an over dose like me. I wouldnt know wat to do. Missing ya Katy i will hopfully come to ur uni to see ya when i got money. Is fun when we together think off them times hunny hugs ya, Missing ya loves ya

 

[katylees]

Thank you everyone .. ill post tomorrow ..bedtime now

 

[UnitynLove]

Did you know that God wants to make a trade with you? He has a standing offer every minute of every day and it's amazing how few of us actually take Him up on His offer. He wants you to give Him all your cares, your problems, and your failures. In return He will give you His peace and joy. On top of that, He promises to protect and take care of you.

God really does want to take care of us, but in order to let Him, we've got to stop trying to take care of ourselves and worrying about every little thing we can't control. Many people would like for God to take care of them, but they insist on worrying or trying to figure out an answer on their own, instead of waiting for God's direction. They wallow around in puddles of their own worry, wondering why God doesn't give them peace. God will give us peace, but we must first give Him our worries.

We give God our worries by trusting that He can and will take care of us. By trusting God, we are able to rest in Him, knowing that He has the situation well under control. Worry, on the other hand, is the opposite of trust. Worry steals our peace, wears us out physically and can even make us sick. If we are worrying, we are not fully trusting God, and we'll never be able to experience His peace.

What a great trade! We give God our worry—He gives us His peace. We give Him all our cares and concerns, and He gives us His protection, stability, and joy. That is the privilege of being cared for by Him.

Because He cares for us, He wants us to live in peace and not all tied up in knots of worry. He has ways of guiding us toward peace, if we are alert enough to sense His direction.

Imagine that you are driving down a road. Along the way, there are roadside signs that provide direction or give warning. If you pay attention to the signs and follow the words, you will be able to drive on that road and safely reach your destination.

In the same way, on the road of life there are spiritual signs along the way. In order to stay under God's protection, you must obey these signs that tell you to trust Him and not to worry. Don't be afraid, have courage. If you'll pay attention to these signs, you'll find that it's easy to stay on course. You will experience the protection, peace and joy that only God can provide.

However, if you fail to heed the signs, you may notice that the road seems a little bumpier than usual and you're not as confident in your ability as you once were. You may become anxious about the unknown things waiting around the corner, and you may even veer off the road.

Anxiety affects us like a double portion of worry. It's an uneasy feeling that lingers like a haze, even after we think we have dealt with it. Once we disregard the signs and go our own way, we are moving in the direction of fear--especially fear of tomorrow and fear of the unknown. The result is anxiety.

Anxiety is like putting on a heavy coat on a hot summer day. It weighs you down. It's difficult to move, and it's stifling to wear. According to Webster's Dictionary, anxiety is "a state of being uneasy, apprehensive, or worried...." Sometimes this uneasiness is really vague—something we just can't put our finger on. All we know is that we are uneasy.

You and I don't need to be anxious about tomorrow when we have all we can handle today. Even if we manage to solve all our problems today, we will just have more to deal with tomorrow...and even more the next day.

Why waste time worrying when it is not going to solve anything? Why be anxious about yesterday, which is gone, or tomorrow, which hasn't arrived yet? Trade your worries in today for God's peace. Remember, everything's going to be all right!

 

[ALIOSIAS]

Hey. Background - I'm 20, at uni in 2nd year studying music. Diagnosed with depression just over a year ago. I also self harm.

These last few days i've been so low. I've actually been scared of myself for the first time. I sat the other night in my room in the dark ..next thing i knew i was cutting. I couldn't feel it, although i felt relaxed. Mycutting is getting worse and so is my depression i think. I wanted to give up totally the other day ..i still do. I don't like being here, i'm so tired of being tired of everything. Nothing seems fun any more, when i go to sleep i wish i could stay asleep.

You may want to try "Daily Meditations" which is a daily e-mail that replaces despair with hope. They advance your faith and give you a sense of destiny. They show you how to access your inheritance in Christ Jesus.

for more information please pm me.

As ever in Christ Jesus,

Aliosias

 

[4givenme]

I know exactly how you feel, in fact I feel the same right now too, I feel that if I really want to, God will just take me in my sleep, no pills, no nothing, just my will to die is enough, I also used to be a cutter, I know the feeling it brings and it is totally seperate than ending it. How bout if you hang in there, I'll hang in there? do we have a deal?

 

[katylees]

I know exactly how you feel, in fact I feel the same right now too, I feel that if I really want to, God will just take me in my sleep, no pills, no nothing, just my will to die is enough, I also used to be a cutter, I know the feeling it brings and it is totally seperate than ending it. How bout if you hang in there, I'll hang in there? do we have a deal?

Ok, i'm hanging, hope you are too.

Not ina good position right now, need to cry but can't the tears won't come. I know what will bring me temp relief and the 'stuff' is right next to me in the drawer but i can't open it. Something is stopping me ..i think it's friends and family. meh *tries to cry*

I hate this world, it hurts.

Ok​

 

[4givenme]

Katylees STOP and call someone RIGHT NOW!!!!

I'll pray for you right now and the rest of the evening and thats all I can do for you from here. You have to promise me you will call someone right now and every hour make a post on this thread so I know your OK. Dear Lord, intervene right now in your daughters life, Holy Spirit wash over her and may she feel your presence RIGHT NOW, Hold her in your loving arms and dont let her go. give her strength to right now make a phone call.
Hang in there

 

[katylees]

Hey, Thank you so much for taking the time to care about me. I didn't 'do' anything i shouldn't have and it;s been nearly 3 weeks since i have done anything like that.

I don't like phones and do not phone people really, there are a couple of people i phone every now and again though.

I'm ok at the moment. Ha, ok that's a lie :S well i'm still living .. there we go. My housemates/friends who i live with all care for me in which i know. And so there's no need to worry.

I hope you're okay?

 

[ArmouredSaint]

hang tough I just want you to realize too,you're not alone here.

 

[katylees]

hang tough I just want you to realize too,you're not alone here.

thanx, yup tough doesn't even begin to describe it ..sigh ah well

 

[haystack]

I know how you feel aswell, I have times like that. Go see a doctor though or a counselor, looks like you need help. *hugs*

 

[katylees]

I'm seeing a doctorand have had counselling but it didn't really work. I see a pysch for CBT now though ..got 3rd session on fri. Sorry that you feel like this sometimes too. It's not good, i wouldn't wish it on anybody.

 

[Mayflower1]

Dear Kat,

Thoughts of suicide are normal during depression but it is very important not to act on those urges because suicide is only a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Have you told anyone how you feel? I will pray for you and I hope that things go okay with you. It is important to tell someone and see a doctor as soon as possible because they can help you cope with this. Therapy and an antidepressant will help you feel good about living again and you won't have to feel so down all of the time. I use to feel that way all of the time but it is slowly getting better. Lily00

 

[katylees]

I'm on my third antidepressant but coming off it to try another one cus i sleep all the time on this one. Also having therapy .. Thankyou for your wors though *hugs*