i'm scared....

[POSICORE]

we are engaged but i dont wanna get married to i'm done with school.....but i do...i'm confused ide love to be married to her right now!!! she is SO WONDERFUL! i'll be done next year... is it hard being married and being in school too?

PS school=college

 

[Leanna]

I got married at 19 and my husband was 21. He went to college while I worked full time and paid the bills.

 

[POSICORE]

you did that? was it hard?

 

[Leanna]

Hmmm well I didn't think it was that hard.... some people even have both people attend college at the same time, HeatherJay (and her husband) in the marriage ministry area did that. I just had to wait to go to college until after my husband finished. So I am in school now. But that worked out pretty well for us.

 

[Singin4Him]

I personally think it is best to get married after the head of the household (the man) is out of college with his BA at least. It is very hard to go to college and be married, especially if you're both in college and one or both are taking a lot of credit hours. It's a lot of responsibility and during the first year of marriage all you want to do is spend time with one another which in tern means you end up neglecting school work and I do speak from experience here haha .

Now I won't say it's not possible because it is but it's a lot harder and it requires a lot more discipline and hard work and less time for your spouse. If you are having concerns and doubt I would take a step back and look at the situation. Sometimes when we feel this way it's God trying to get our attention, be open to hearing God's will in the situation. Never get married when there is doubt in your heart, resolve that before you marry.

 

[Amy47]

My bf finished College in September and we will only get married when he has a steady job and we have some $ saved up. But that's us. You see we knew that we wouldn't be oging to school long to we didn't have to get married while in school. But for you it may be different. How long will you be in School for? And does she go to school too, if she does for how long?

 

[LiveLaughLove]

I honestly believe that if you are ready emotionally, spiritually, and financially, there is nothing wrong with marrying before one or both of you are finished with college. My fiance and I will be marrying shortly before we complete our sophomore years of college. I feel completely ready to marry him, and I also feel that God is leading our relationship in that direction--so many doors have been opened for us in the past little bit that it's just amazing. I can see God working.

It will be hard, but totally worth it IMO.

~ Regina ~

 

[Leanna]

I'll side with the "marry when you are ready" crowd. I'm not big on the whole "man needs to have a job" aspect.... we just agreed beforehand. I would work full time while he went to college and when he got out and had a full time job then I would get to stay home with kids. So that's what we did and I am so happy we did it that way. I don't think there was anything negative for me in him being in college while we were together, in dating your girlfriend/boyfriend can be as much if not MORE of a distraction. So whats the difference except you get to live together?

 

[POSICORE]

thank you all for your well appreciated advice!

 

[PurpleBunny]

If my hubby and I had waited until he had a job in Canada to be married... well, we wouldn't be married yet and I'd still be working in the icky job I had before instead of the awesome one I have now. Sure, things can be a bit tight between paycheques, but we're doing okay and he's enjoying school.

I say marry when ready. As long as you don't have to borrow from parents or others to pay the rent or bills, it's all good. (Tuition is another matter entirely, imo, though... his parents are paying his tuition but that was agreed on before we even got married.)

 

[Leanna]

I wish my in laws would have paid for my husband's tuition *sniff*

 

[POSICORE]

I wish my in laws would have paid for my husband's tuition *sniff*

hehe

 

[ardeur]

My boyfriend and I are both graduating with our BS's on 12/10. We've discussed marriage an umpteenth number of times, but there is no engagement yet. I'm a tiny bit worried about being married while he's in graduate school, but then again, he has received MANY scholarships AND he'll be working as a teacher while he's in grad school. As for me, I'm done with school for at least another year (possibly grad school next). I'll be working full-time and so I think it'll be easy to support ourselves if we got married in our current situation.

The only thing we want to take care of before marriage is our student loan debt. I only have a couple thousand, but he has a little bit more than that (less than 10,000). With a good job I could easily pay off my debt in a few months, then I will go on to save money for a car... and then save money for a wedding, if we're still talking about a wedding at that point in time. I still think we could easily handle being married before paying off that debt, but I honestly think being in a good financial situaiton (no or minimal debt) is the best thing for a new marriage.

 

[LilNifer04]

My parents got married almost 10 years before my step dad graduated. They got married and had two kids and my dad went to school part time instead of full time once my brothers were born. But now he has a bachelors and my Mom doesnt have to work anymore.

 

[melandshanetria]

Everything seems to be falling right into place for me and my SO. We're both in college and will be graduating around November of 06. He have a good job as a Telecommunication Specialist in addition to owning his own Interior Design Business. I will be going back to my old job in the Health Occupation Field at the begginning of 06 and it pays good money! The only downfall we have is...I have a $4,000 student loan to pay back starting 3 months after graduation. But on the bright side, we don't have to purchase any furniture, (I already have all that) and I have a nice car so we could get around in. We are planning on opening up our own Desktop Publishing Business and having a house either built or we may put a manufactured house on a extra piece of land owned by my parents. God will open doors for us all, it's all about compromising and being smart. :-D

 

[seamonster]

Marry when you're ready.
I was a junior in college when my husband and I got married, and he was working. As soon as I graduate he's going to start school.

 

[FaithfulServant]

I will be married while still in college. I am getting my bachelor's degree and will have 9 months left of school when we are married next August. My fiance is getting his bachelor's degree and TWO master's degrees so he will have 2 - 3 years and 9 months left when we get married. He will be able to work part time when working on his master's degrees and I will be working full time.

A lot of people will discourage you to not get married while in college. Many people think because they waited till they graduated thats what everyone should do. However, God has different plans for each couple. Two of my fiance's brothers got married while in medical school and another brother who is also in medical school is about to get engaged.

If they can be married while in medical school (which in my opinion is probably way harder than regular college classes) then it can definitely be done.

Pray about it and wait for an answer. Get married when you are ready, not when someone else tells you that you are ready.

 

[POSICORE]

i think i've came to the conclusion of marrying after college....i feel ide be ready then. i love my finacee more than anything, and i know this

 

[livingondreams]

My fiance and I are not waiting until after we finish college. We have already been together for nearly three years now, and feel that we are both ready to make that lifelong committment to each other. It will be hard, but totally worth it. We feel God's blessing on our relationship and our marriage, and waiting a few more years to marry just because of college is not an option for us.

 

[Bunnymedic]

I got married when I was 19. I had no college education and neither did my husband.It was very hard. I will not lie. Being married is not easy , especially when you are young and don't have a higher level of education. We barely got by paying a mortgage, phone, power, insurance and car payments every month. I went to a community college and got certified as a paramedic shortly after we married. while I was in school I could only work part time.I had saved up before we married to pay for school, but because I wasn't bring in much income, alot of my school money went to bills.I am sure that you can not wait to get married, but because of my own expirience I would advise you to wait untill you finish school! It's only a year! I am sure if your fiance loves you and wants to be with you, waiting a year will not be a huge issue.Once you are married you will have less time and more resposibilities than you realize.You don't need the stress of finishing school the first year you are married. It will a big enough adjustment by itself.