Hellos, everyone.
I've been looking for a place to discuss Jesus and God and Christian theology. A little background: when I was growing up, my family had no real religious practices or affiliations, but I started attending church youth groups with my friends and got the opportunity to hear Francis Chan speak. He's awesome. Anyway, I went on in life, feeling in my heart that Jesus is the only way to salvation.
But I was caught up in my own life. I went to Iraq in 2005 and saw some horrific things. I returned knowing there were many times I came incredibly close to being killed, but wasn't. In May of 2009, I was ejected from a vehicle and broke my back and skull. The same part of the skull that Dale Earnhardt fractured in his fatal accident. The majority of people who suffer basilar skull fractures die. I spent two weeks in an induced coma, with my family at my bedside. President Obama visited me when he made his rounds and there was more support than I feel I deserved. I was in the care of some of the best neurosurgeons in the world, who were experts at dealing with traumatic brain injuries. One evening, they told my family they had done everything they could do to stop my brain from bleeding. They weren't sure if I'd make it until the morning. For some reason, I did. I've been told it's a miracle I survived, not to mention I'm able to speak, read and write. The things that I took for granted before I was injured.
I have been blessed with a beautiful and selfless wife and a wonderful baby girl. I can't really understand why a selfish and defiant guy like me has them, as well as my survival of the injury. In my defense, I can at least say I take no credit for my survival and recovery. God wants me here, or else I would have died three years ago.
When I consider the prospect of being condemned to an eternity in Hell, it is the scariest thing I can imagine. I just have this fear of going there still and I at least know there's no other way to avoid it, other than salvation through Jesus. I just have so many questions and doubts about certain things. I wish I were able to just never think of them, but I can't. I do believe God has made my constitution, and He doesn't want blind acceptance. Or He would have just made us all robots. I just have trouble finding and trusting my faith.
In summary, I don't feel very valuable or worthy of this life and the things I have in it. But I have a strong desire and need to know I will not spend an eternity apart from God. Whether you believe in everlasting punishment or annihilation, the separation from God is what scares me the most.
I look forward to reading and learning as much as I can here. I think I'll keep my distance from some of the doctrinal and theological debates that are a little over my head at this point. I just want to see Jesus and hear him welcome me to heaven. It sounds selfish, which it is, and I'm ok with that.
Joel
I've been looking for a place to discuss Jesus and God and Christian theology. A little background: when I was growing up, my family had no real religious practices or affiliations, but I started attending church youth groups with my friends and got the opportunity to hear Francis Chan speak. He's awesome. Anyway, I went on in life, feeling in my heart that Jesus is the only way to salvation.
But I was caught up in my own life. I went to Iraq in 2005 and saw some horrific things. I returned knowing there were many times I came incredibly close to being killed, but wasn't. In May of 2009, I was ejected from a vehicle and broke my back and skull. The same part of the skull that Dale Earnhardt fractured in his fatal accident. The majority of people who suffer basilar skull fractures die. I spent two weeks in an induced coma, with my family at my bedside. President Obama visited me when he made his rounds and there was more support than I feel I deserved. I was in the care of some of the best neurosurgeons in the world, who were experts at dealing with traumatic brain injuries. One evening, they told my family they had done everything they could do to stop my brain from bleeding. They weren't sure if I'd make it until the morning. For some reason, I did. I've been told it's a miracle I survived, not to mention I'm able to speak, read and write. The things that I took for granted before I was injured.
I have been blessed with a beautiful and selfless wife and a wonderful baby girl. I can't really understand why a selfish and defiant guy like me has them, as well as my survival of the injury. In my defense, I can at least say I take no credit for my survival and recovery. God wants me here, or else I would have died three years ago.
When I consider the prospect of being condemned to an eternity in Hell, it is the scariest thing I can imagine. I just have this fear of going there still and I at least know there's no other way to avoid it, other than salvation through Jesus. I just have so many questions and doubts about certain things. I wish I were able to just never think of them, but I can't. I do believe God has made my constitution, and He doesn't want blind acceptance. Or He would have just made us all robots. I just have trouble finding and trusting my faith.
In summary, I don't feel very valuable or worthy of this life and the things I have in it. But I have a strong desire and need to know I will not spend an eternity apart from God. Whether you believe in everlasting punishment or annihilation, the separation from God is what scares me the most.
I look forward to reading and learning as much as I can here. I think I'll keep my distance from some of the doctrinal and theological debates that are a little over my head at this point. I just want to see Jesus and hear him welcome me to heaven. It sounds selfish, which it is, and I'm ok with that.
Joel