I want to be a sperm donor

Rev.Ross · Aug 3, 2011

I want to be a sperm donor to a Christian couple. It would have to be by Artificial Insemination only, as I have a covenant with my wife, and would not feel right having sex with another woman. I believe AI is not sinful because there is no nudity and no genital touching or contact between the sperm donor and the recipient. The sperm is collected after masturbation and places in a media substance to keep it viable. Then the sperm in shipped overnight to the couple needing the sperm donation. They get the sperm and use a vaginal syringe for the insemination. It is not expensive and effective.
Masturbation is not a sin. It is a body function to [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] sperm for sexual release or health reasons-post vasectomy or to avoid prostate cancer. That being said, my wife and I never had children. I am 64 years old and want to leave a legacy of life to a Christian couple. In the Bible, this was done by natural insemination, but now we have the means to avoid that and give the gift of life.
Any thoughts or prayers or Scripture to share about this? Rev. Ross

Fenny the Fox · Aug 3, 2011

Can't think of a scripture pertaining to it off the top of my head. But regardless (I am sure someone will)...

I admire what you want to do. Help another couple in their dream to have children, even when you have not done so yourself. I will certainly pray for you, brother.
Good luck, and God bless.

I will leave it there, as I don't really (atm) have any argument or debate points. haha

Autumnleaf · Aug 3, 2011

How selfless of you. I'm sure people are PMing you left and right to take you up on such a generous offer.

The Nihilist · Aug 3, 2011

Are you handling this yourself, or are you doing it through a company that actually does this kind of thing?
Also, do you know the couple personally? If you do, what legal steps are the three of you taking to ensure that you have no parental rights or responsibilities?

jayem · Aug 3, 2011

No moral problem there that I can see.

Just some medical details: You need to at least consider both your and the mother's personal and family medical history--particularly regarding familial conditions, like diabetes, heart disease, hypertension, lipid problems, etc. If both of you have diabetes in a first degree relative, the child has a significantly higher risk for this. If the mother has ever been pregnant before, make sure there's no Rh incompatibility (she's Rh negative and you're positive.) Be aware that there are a number of studies showing that advanced paternal age (over 50) may be a risk factor for the autism spectrum disorders. There are also studies suggesting a higher risk of schizophrenia in children of older fathers. It's fairly well established, that chromosome abnormalities become more common in older men, but the prior theories about older parents and Down Syndrome may be incorrect.

Just food for thought. The vast majority of children of older fathers are perfectly healthy. Best of luck to you and the mom.

Rev.Ross · Aug 3, 2011

I am very aware of the medical info. needed for sperm donation. Any life has potential problems. I am generally healthy, take no prescribed medications, and take a variety of vitamins and supplements. I am a fairly healthy 64 year old guy.
Honestly, I am not advertising here, and have had no PM's. I would do this independently and not through an agency. I have studied how to do all of this.
Right now I am leaving this to God. If it is His will it will happen. I would even sign a consent form that the child could learn my identity when he/she turned 18, if the other parents wanted to do so.
It is all up to the Lord.
God's blessings to all, Gary

lux et lex · Aug 3, 2011

I would still recommend having a lawyer draft some sort of legal document. A handshake, however well meaning, still doesn't have much weight in court if things go wrong.

The Nihilist · Aug 3, 2011

Rev.Ross said:
I would do this independently and not through an agency. I have studied how to do all of this.

As a sperm donor, this is how I know you're not actually serious.

wanderingone · Aug 3, 2011

The Nihilist said:
As a sperm donor, this is how I know you're not actually serious.

I'm pretty sure he just likes talking about masturbation.

Rev.Ross · Aug 3, 2011

I am quite serious and have a close friend who is a medical professional to research and assist my quest. I have done a lot of research on this topic and know how to go about it in a very detailed and workable way. TYB is a preservative for sperm until they reach their source. Get the sperm to the woman by overnight mail, and they are viable for 48 hours. This is not about masturbation, it is about giving an infertile couple the chance to have and raise a child, and also my way of leaving a legacy of life. It is all about life.
Thanks, Rev. Ross

GrumpGrump · Aug 4, 2011

An infertile couple who knows the specific reason why they are infertile (ie, that it's his sperm count as opposed to one of countless other reasons) has likely already dropped a good amount of money on fertility doctors and exams. With that kind of investment already made, I'm pretty sure they would also drop the extra money to ensure proper genetic testing, a viable sperm count, and the option of selecting traits suited to the family they're trying to build.

It is very "generous" of you to pump your little swimmers into a cup and so selflessly give another couple the opportunity to raise your child at no cost to yourself, but in your position (pun intended), I think I'd take into consideration this question: Do I really want to entrust my genetic material to someone who thinks, "Oh yes, ordering sperm from a strange sexagenarian on the internet with a mysterious genetic and medical history and a completely unknown sperm count sounds like a GREAT IDEA. I'm going to do that RIGHT NOW."? That's not someone I'm going to let raise my kid. There's a pretty clear deficiency in common sense.

But I'm sure Darwin would admire your entrepreneurial attitude. After all, if you're older than 40 (the recommended cutoff by the American Society for Reproductive Medicine), you gotta market the genetic material where you can. Gullible, infertile couples on the internet are better than no couples!

Rev.Ross · Aug 4, 2011

I would only do this with a couple I personally met and knew more about them, and vice versa. I will have screening tests and sperm counts done, no problem there. The recipient couple I want to be sincere Christians. Years ago a woman volunteered to be a surrogate for us, and I turned it down. Oh well. Blessings, Rev. Ross

DaisyDay · Aug 4, 2011

Why do you want to be a sperm donor?

Have you actually met a couple who would be willing to take your specific sperm? You seem kind of old for this...is it for a sort of immortality?

GrumpGrump · Aug 4, 2011

I don't think you're picking up what I'm putting down. What I was trying to say is your plan seems structurally flawed. 1. Anyone who responded to the way you're currently marketing yourself would have to be hopelessly stupid and also gullible, because, 2. no matter the couple, their better option is a sperm bank than you.

You can't frame this as trying to "help" some poor infertile couple. You're never going to be a couple's best option-- their best option is to go to a sperm bank with all the legal, medical, and genetic protections (and options) available. They can select a donor based on hair & eye color, height, and accomplishments (with a little research, it seems like the cost is maybe $600 a pop). I wouldn't take issue with your plan if you were to say, "Someone please use my sperm so that my genetic line doesn't fizzle out," but the whole "help a poor infertile couple" tack is disingenuous. You're not helping them; they're helping you.

The ONLY case in which you can claim to be doing someone a favor is IF the couple cannot afford to pay for sperm donation. However, if you're insisting upon meeting the couple, then there's going to be the expense of traveling to meet you, so it probably wouldn't be cheaper for them anyway. So I really can't imagine that there's any couple out there who wins by asking you for your donation.

So it seems a lot more like you're asking a favor rather than selflessly helping. You're asking someone to forgo the options & protections of a sperm bank and use your sperm instead, then raise your biological child at their own expense.

If nothing else, you reeeeeally need to work on your marketing strategy. Maybe you have fabulous DNA enclosed in some viable sperm, but if you want to be more than some dude hawking his vintage sperm over the internets, you should probably ask yourself what would motivate a couple to think you're a reasonable option, or at least what makes you something other than the guy who posted possibly the squickiest ChristianForums thread ever.

wanderingone · Aug 4, 2011

Rev.Ross said:
I am quite serious and have a close friend who is a medical professional to research and assist my quest. I have done a lot of research on this topic and know how to go about it in a very detailed and workable way. TYB is a preservative for sperm until they reach their source. Get the sperm to the woman by overnight mail, and they are viable for 48 hours. This is not about masturbation, it is about giving an infertile couple the chance to have and raise a child, and also my way of leaving a legacy of life. It is all about life.
Thanks, Rev. Ross

My tongue in cheek comment was based on the threads you have chosen to start or comment in and the content of your comments.

As for your bizarre sperm donation wish. If you want to donate go donate via a qualified medical program. You seem to be advertising your sperm here, it's kind of odd.

Rev.Ross · Aug 4, 2011

Grump,
Thanks for the input and your thoughtful replies. Believe me I am aware of the process involved. I worked in the field of science for many years, including genetics. That being said, honestly I am not advertising here. I value opinions, both pro and con;
Thanks, Rev. Ross

FaithLikeARock · Aug 4, 2011

I want to ask the question why you only want a "sincere" Christian couple, but I have a feeling I know the answer.

Listen, if you want to give, go through a medical office. I know you think you're doing a great thing, but just giving it and doing the most basic medical examinations is not going to work. People who go in for insemination go through a lot of examinations (mental and physical) before they actually become impregnated, to ensure they are prepared to have a child. That you only expect them to be a "sincere Christian couple" - you may know your sperm count and genetics but you aren't expecting the same out of them and you have no idea that they would comply even if you did.

It's safer on your part, and the parents part, to just go through a clinic. Personally, I can't even call the act selfless when to me, it just seems like another half-baked attempt to breed more "Christian by birth" babies by refusing to help non-Christians who need extra help to get pregnant.

Rev.Ross · Aug 4, 2011

Like a Rock,
You raise some good questions for my cosideration. Actually I have already had simlar thoughts and am at peace with my personal answers. I think this would take some conversation with a couple seeking a donor. Last year, I had a discussion with a couple, but my life was too busy at the time and so was theirs. SO I am leaving all of this in God's hands. Any medical information they want from me I am willing to give, and I will honestly answer all questions. Thanks, Rev. Ross

MountainCappuccino · Aug 5, 2011

Rev.Ross said:
I am very aware of the medical info. needed for sperm donation. Any life has potential problems. I am generally healthy, take no prescribed medications, and take a variety of vitamins and supplements. I am a fairly healthy 64 year old guy.
Honestly, I am not advertising here, and have had no PM's. I would do this independently and not through an agency. I have studied how to do all of this.
Right now I am leaving this to God. If it is His will it will happen. I would even sign a consent form that the child could learn my identity when he/she turned 18, if the other parents wanted to do so.
It is all up to the Lord.
God's blessings to all, Gary

Don't do it. The risk of autism developing in that child will be astronomical because of your gender and age.

Rev.Ross · Aug 5, 2011

I appreciate all of the comments, and will take everything into consideration. As stated I was not advertising, but expressing a sincere wish. All of you have helped think.
Thank you so much, Rev. Ross

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