I;M new here

[juliem52]

Hi all I am a widow stuck in the past my husband was only 45 when he died and i was 41at that time I have a son who is now married with 2 lovely boys.1 aged 3yrs and the other is 10mths.it is so hard my son tells me its time to move on I mean its been 11yrs and i feel like I haunt my husband as I cant seem to give him up.my son has took along time and still after all this time I feel he needs help sometimes but them he will now talk about the things his dad used to do now my son was a teenager when we lost his dad just the time he needed his dad it was hard being mum n dad to my son but that i am told i did well.
if there is anybody out there that would like to talk to me as thats the one thing I havent had is someone to talk to.I lost both my parents after my husband died so its been a hard ten yrs really

would love to hear of someone
thank you for readin this post
julie

 

[profmom]

Juliem
Welcome - You have faced much difficulty in the past 11 years. What are you doing to let go? Have you poured yourself into your children so much that you've lost a bit of yourself? It is so easy to do. I have found that I spend way too much time with my daughter and her little 1 year old - it's as though they are trying to keep me busy but I know they have and need a life of their own. I need to find my place in this world without my husband. Perhaps take a class or go to a grief group to get you out of the house. Do whatever it takes to 'do the next thing'. It's more healthy for you and your family if you move on after all these years. It's not that you are forgetting your husband but rather honoring his memory by allowing yourself to move on to the life he would want you to have.

 

[TogetherForever]

I understand. I feel like I am stuck myself. It's been 2 years 8 months, and I can't seem to let go. I always said my life began when I got married, and now...

In the past few months I've taken a realty course and got my license, sold my house and bought a townhouse which I love. One week after I moved (May 8th), my daughter gave birth to beautiful boy, my first grandchild. We live very close so I get to spend time with them every day except weekends. I know God is taking care of me and I have much to be thankful for, yet there's still a big hole in my heart and I ask the Lord when will this pain be over. I haven't been to church in a few weeks. I feel so all alone when I go, so I stay home with my dog. I am very lonely.

I've thought about volunteering somewhere, to help someone in need.

It's not good for us to stay where we are. I pray that God will direct us both to where He wants us to be.

 

[c1ners]

juliem, please feel free to talk to me anytime. It's been almost 21 years since my husband passed away, and a day doesn't go by that I don't think about him. I have moved on with my life, but my heart is definetly stuck in the past.