I Hate Cars

[Ivy]

I don't have exactly scads of money, so I haven't ever been able to afford a car that's less than 10 years old, 100K on it.....so I'll have something for a year, year and a half, and then it starts making weird noises or having other problems........I don't know why this bugs me so much, it's not exactly a biggie on the worldwide scale of problems.....but it really does bug me. The current vehicle I have takes a lot of oil, but otherwise has been great, until last week when some valve or other started rattling.

Even when I'm typing this out I can see from an objective, intellectual problem that it's not such a big deal that it should put me in despair, but it always does.........it seems to trigger, mainly, feelings that "I don't matter/everyone forgets about me/no one cares/I'm alone" etc.

And anger, too, with significant others who have failed me and let me down and don't seem to give a bleep, I guess the car symbolizes them. I don't like feeling blown off, it gives me a bad bad feeling that I can't seem to combat very well.

It's not that I can't think of practical solutions to this particular problem, it's not that they don't get solved, they do......but I don't know what to do about the underlying feeling of despair and abandonment that it brings up. Pretty much any large appliance that breaks does it.

 

[Frangible]

Ivy,

I know how you feel... well, I like my car, but your identification of taking things too hard even though it doesn't make sense is a very perceptive observation to make about yourself.

I used to get that way about pretty much everything, and took even the smallest sign of not being included, contacted etc as someone giving me the cold shoulder. Even though I could rationally realize I was having an abnormal reaction that was not logical, it was beyond my concious control.

Later I realized that was Borderline Personality Disorder:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder

I don't know if that's what you have specifically, but there are a variety of pretty closely related conditions.

Anyway, you've at least identified part (or all, I have no idea) of this issue, so let's move on to getting rid of this annoying hypersensitive hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal response... permanently.

I would strongly suggest seeing a professional psychiatrist. There are other ways, but the fact is that is the fastest and most effective treatment option. It still will take time, and there's a lot of anxiety involved in making that first appointment, but it's worth it.

There's no panacea and at first things will be more difficult, but over time those unwanted feelings will diminish.

I know it's really hard to make that first call, but please, you need to. What you're feeling is very real and beyond your control, but treatment is very much in your control.

Who knows... you might even like cars eventually

 

[pumanator]

Our so called modern conveniences are no always what they are cracked up to be. In our society you really can't get by without a car unless you live in a big metro area with really good pub trans.

I heard a pastor once say that 75% of ppl don't care about our prayer requests ,ie issues of life, and the rest think we are getting our due. I see these forums as an anomoly in our christian world and I'm thankful for it. Yes, it stinks that most ppl in the church really could careless about those less fortunate. They have more than enough and want more but that is our materialist American chirstianity

This puts you in a very unique position...you must totally trust God to provide you with safe dependable transportation, but you must try to also educate yourself as how to find a good used car (I would be more than happy to PM you on the finer points as I have been in sale and have gone through many used cars for I and my college age kids).

I can relate to how you feel...you more than likely don't work on your own car and repairs are very expensive and knowing when to send a car to the wrecker is tough.

I can no longer work on cars the way I used to because of the many physical problems I have developed and get help from noone when I need it (we also must keep in mind that ppl are very busy these days, but it would be nice FAMILY would help). I live on a none county access road with 7 other home owners and for years I have done most of the snow removel. When the ppl where told that I couldn't do it anymore most were silent and none stepped up to help...when the snow gets to deep to traverse maybe that will change.

Look to God and ask Him to bring you your next car in His time

In His love,

Puma

 

[Darrell2006]

I havn't had a car in a few years, I also got sick of buying a $1500 car and always having mechanical problems, I think I had one used car that was reliable the rest have been a headache, I finaly decided I would wait to buy a new or used car that had a good warranty.

Daryl

 

[Ivy]

Our so called modern conveniences are no always what they are cracked up to be. In our society you really can't get by without a car unless you live in a big metro area with really good pub trans.

I heard a pastor once say that 75% of ppl don't care about our prayer requests ,ie issues of life, and the rest think we are getting our due. I see these forums as an anomoly in our christian world and I'm thankful for it. Yes, it stinks that most ppl in the church really could careless about those less fortunate. They have more than enough and want more but that is our materialist American chirstianity

This puts you in a very unique position...you must totally trust God to provide you with safe dependable transportation, but you must try to also educate yourself as how to find a good used car (I would be more than happy to PM you on the finer points as I have been in sale and have gone through many used cars for I and my college age kids).

I can relate to how you feel...you more than likely don't work on your own car and repairs are very expensive and knowing when to send a car to the wrecker is tough.

I can no longer work on cars the way I used to because of the many physical problems I have developed and get help from noone when I need it (we also must keep in mind that ppl are very busy these days, but it would be nice FAMILY would help). I live on a none county access road with 7 other home owners and for years I have done most of the snow removel. When the ppl where told that I couldn't do it anymore most were silent and none stepped up to help...when the snow gets to deep to traverse maybe that will change.

Look to God and ask Him to bring you your next car in His time

In His love,

Puma

Howdy, Puma.......I can use all the advice I can get and would be glad to get the PM I'm hoping to get a newer Saturn than the one I have, Consumer Reports rate them as very reliable and they're not as expensive as Hondas and Toyotas (which I would love to have one of those, but $......). The wheeling & dealing part, knowing if I'm getting ripped off or not is tough......I've gotten ripped off a few times by mechanics and I think that is just so rotten to take advantage of a person who obviously doesn't have buckets of money, else why would they be driving a car 150K + and eleven years old? I mean, there are Bible verses that talk about taking advantage of the needy But maybe I'm going into overreaction mode again .........the whole thing certainly makes those old abandonment issues boil to the surface.....I suppose I'll thank the Lord someday for doing that, bringing it to the surface. Probably time for me to get out one of those Bible promise books along with my car listing magazines.

The old one, the engine has a knock, sounds like the sound you'd get if you were holding a playing card against a spinning bike tire. Someone told me it could be the oil valve or the crankcase, and my limited knowledge knows the latter is the beginning of the end.......I'm paranoid to drive out lest I get stranded.

 

[pumanator]

Howdy, Puma.......I can use all the advice I can get and would be glad to get the PM I'm hoping to get a newer Saturn than the one I have, Consumer Reports rate them as very reliable and they're not as expensive as Hondas and Toyotas (which I would love to have one of those, but $......). The wheeling & dealing part, knowing if I'm getting ripped off or not is tough......I've gotten ripped off a few times by mechanics and I think that is just so rotten to take advantage of a person who obviously doesn't have buckets of money, else why would they be driving a car 150K + and eleven years old? I mean, there are Bible verses that talk about taking advantage of the needy But maybe I'm going into overreaction mode again .........the whole thing certainly makes those old abandonment issues boil to the surface.....I suppose I'll thank the Lord someday for doing that, bringing it to the surface. Probably time for me to get out one of those Bible promise books along with my car listing magazines.

The old one, the engine has a knock, sounds like the sound you'd get if you were holding a playing card against a spinning bike tire. Someone told me it could be the oil valve or the crankcase, and my limited knowledge knows the latter is the beginning of the end.......I'm paranoid to drive out lest I get stranded.

That sounds like a bad lifter or rocker arm. There are car forums you can go to for help and could prob find on google. Figure out what kind of car exactly with the options and miles you think you'll get and check these sites. www.kbb.com , www.nadaguides.com , www.autotrader.com . These will give you an idea of what you should pay. If your not a automobile club member then join. they have car buying service and info and if you break down a tow home. That's a start. Lets keep this in this thread for other woodbe car ppl so it might help them. Also, stay away from no name road side dealers. The big name dealer will usually have nice cars but pricy and hard to grind. Never go shopping alone either. Find someone you trust who knows something about the process and never buy the same day...sleeep on it. You will also want to use www.carfax.com to check any prospective car.

 

[Ivy]

Hi, I just wanted to return & give thanks....the Lord led me to a nice little vehicle, a '99 Saturn with comparatively low mileage. I'm really enjoying driving it around and thanking my faithful God for giving me favor with the bank etc. The dealer had incorrectly advertised it for $1K lower than the actual price, but he honored the advertised price.

 

[Nebmaatisus]

Well, if your car breaks up when you are in a hurry, you just have to put things in perspective. In the university where I studied Theology, if something went awry we used to say "It will have no effect on our salvation". Of course a car like that is a nuisance, but on the long run what will it matter? (Only if I remembered that myself when my Bedford refuses to start on a cold wither morning)
It is good you got a car with low mileage. These days cars are not meant to last long. A 1970 Chevy could be more reliable than a 1990 Toyota. It is ridiculous, cars should become better, but they only become more fragile. Even these modern cars last longer if you look properly after them. Rule no 1: the more you use money on oil, the more money you save. Choose a quality brand and change it often (the oil, not the brand). Rule no 2: beware of rust! There is not any extra metal on modern cars, so keep your car well protected.

 

[ArmouredSaint]

God let her car be a good one! Such a stress releaser when they aren't! I had a Toyota '97 Landcrusier that I'm sure was born of the Christine line.

 

[Ivy]

God let her car be a good one! Such a stress releaser when they aren't! I had a Toyota '97 Landcrusier that I'm sure was born of the Christine line.

Well, it's going great so far I've heard a lot of good about Toyotas, too, like they have divine lasting abilities. A friend of mine said he was getting bored of his and took it down to Florida (from NY) with no oil in it in an effort to "kill" the car (very strange guy, I can't figure why someone would want to do that).....well, they went down & back, then he drove the car for TWO MORE YEARS. Amazing.

 

[kisstheson]

Ivy,

What I would like to know is who is that cute guy you're using as an avatar? I wouldn't mind riding in a car with him, even if it was an old junky one. Hello?

 

[Ivy]

Ivy,

What I would like to know is who is that cute guy you're using as an avatar? I wouldn't mind riding in a car with him, even if it was an old junky one. Hello?

I was wondering when you were going to say something about my avatar
Whew-wee. Lordy lordy.