i had a miscarriage last month... :(

i thought baby was ok til i started cramping really bad, and bleeding a Lot. i felt a little movement. then i was like where is the movement??? i didnt 100% realize the baby misc. til i went to the obgyn dr on wednesday. they did a ultrasound and there was no baby. they said im really sorry but u arent pregnant anymore.

i am upset and dunno how to react. i thot i still felt baby move but i guess it's just the after effects. i wanna cry alot and sleep, but cant cuz ppl would ask why. i was preg. by rape and that makes it worse, cuz i gotta deal with the rape too.

im ok right now, just down, upset, feel alone, am tired, a lil shaky from knowing i miscarried. if u can relate - misc., could u pm me or reply to this post? thanks. i need God's strength in this whole situation (rape, preg, then misc.)...

can yall pray for me??? it would mean a lot to me, knowing someone is praying for me. i wanted a girl but i never got to find out what i was having.

i g2g off but will get on soon, to see if anyone has replied. i just need a friend to talk to about this. it's hard dealing with it all. but i just am praying alot more. i'm here for any1 else who needs to talk as well. i am thankful for this board. thanks.

~michelle~ (alicia)

praying. your story is sad. bless your heart. i'm praying for healling and comfort to overcome your loss and grief.

thanks for your prayers. it means alot to know i have people praying. *hugs* im not having a good 2 days but im ok. im just tired. i went to bed at 11pm last night and had a nightmare but didnt wake up til 11:50am this morning.

thanks for listening and caring.

wow, at 38 wks????? im so sorry hun. yes i need to talk so i'll send u a pm. hugs. i couldnt sleep. i went to bed at 1am and got up at 8am. im so tired but am ok.

thanks for listening and caring

I'm praying Michelle and sending so many hugs your way .

thanks. it means alot. hugs. its just hard

lostndown said:

i thought baby was ok til i started cramping really bad, and bleeding a Lot. i felt movement. then i was like where is the movement??? i was 5 mnths. i didnt 100% realize the baby misc. til i went to the obgyn dr on wednesday. they did a ultrasound and there was no baby. they said im really sorry but u arent pregnant anymore.

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I am so sorry and am praying for you.

i am upset and dunno how to react. i thot i still felt baby move but i guess it's just the after effects. i wanna cry alot and sleep, but cant cuz ppl would ask why.

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Those that love you would/will understand. It is best to talk to people and let these things out.

i know. it's just hard. thanx 4 prayers

lostndown said:

i thought baby was ok til i started cramping really bad, and bleeding a Lot. i felt movement. then i was like where is the movement??? i was 5 mnths. i didnt 100% realize the baby misc. til i went to the obgyn dr on wednesday. they did a ultrasound and there was no baby. they said im really sorry but u arent pregnant anymore.

i am upset and dunno how to react. i thot i still felt baby move but i guess it's just the after effects. i wanna cry alot and sleep, but cant cuz ppl would ask why. i was preg. by rape and that makes it worse, cuz i gotta deal with the rape too.

im ok right now, just down, upset, feel alone, am tired, a lil shaky from knowing i miscarried. if u can relat - misc., could u pm me or reply to this post? thanks. i need God's strength in this whole situation (rape, preg, then misc.)...

can yall pray for me??? it would mean a lot to me, knowing someone is praying for me. i wanted a girl but i never got to find out what i was having.

i g2g off but will get on soon, to see if anyone has replied. i just need a friend to talk to about this. it's hard dealing with it all. but i just am praying alot more. i'm here for any1 else who needs to talk as well. i am thankful for this board. thanks.

~michelle~ (alicia)

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Dearest Michelle,
We have had several miscarriages, and I have a son named William that lived for 1 day. In the hospital parking garage with whoever was looking on, I was on my knees begging God not to take my son. After praying for an hour or so,I had a peace that I have never known. I went back and told my wife that he would live because God said everything will be all right. He died a few hours later and i was in complete shock. I could not talk, I could barely breath. The next few days were a blur in my life, and still are today. I was mad at God, but in my anger I found Him. I demanded to know why He lied to me. Why let me believe and then make a fool out of me. This is what He said to my heart " I am God and I do not lie. I promised you everything will be all right and you will be fine". Then I knew what He meant, He never said William would live.. {{sorry this has me crying now and that is ok. I am human.}} He said it would be ok. Then I remembered looking at the other kids in the NICU. I had such sorrow and compassion for them, this is when I knew I wanted to be a nurse. God never said He would live, I just thought He meant that. God's ways are not our ways. Remember this: Your son or daughter is in HEAVEN, feeling no pain, dancing with Jesus, and waiting on you. This has changed my life, especially since I know William is looking down at me, my own personal angel. God does love me, and He loves you too. If you need to cry, then cry, get it out. Its ok everything will be fine. My advice is to pray and try to do things that take your mind off of your pain. Talking with friends can go either way. Take a walk, or better yet walk to where you can see the sun rise or set. This helped me greatly. Do not let this make you bitter, its not worth it. Just so you know my Mom was raped also, this is how I was born. one last thing... For you to have been keeping your baby, says a whole lot about you. If there is anything I can do, and I do mean anything, I am a mental health nurse that works with these kinds of things. You can e-mail, private message me, or if you need a human voice, pm me and I will even give you a way to do that.................. May God bless and keep you Michelle...............Michael

one more thing. You need to complete the grief process, this is important. Some feel shame or it is their fault. Do not let the devil tell you this. NONE of it is your fault. I mean it, do not for one second think that it is. Good things happen to good people. I am gonna pray for you Michelle until I touch the Throne Of Grace. His grace is sufficient............................michael

thanks... i need to talk, but i cant trust guys or men right now... im thankful for your encouragement, but i cant talk to a guy right now. i hope u can understand. i just need some extra prayer but im ok right now.

thanks for caring...

~michelle~ (alicia)

lostndown said:

thanks... i need to talk, but i cant trust guys or men right now... im thankful for your encouragement, but i cant talk to a guy right now. i hope u can understand. i just need some extra prayer but im ok right now.

thanks for caring...

~michelle~ (alicia)

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I understand. I am still gonna pray for you. Bless you . I hope you are ok.

thanks. it means alot yes im ok

Aww I am really sorry and you will be in my prayers. You know what? Your little one who you didnt have and never even saw face to face is in the arms of the Lord and He is whatching over your little one. One day soon you will see your child in Hevean. Although you never saw your child, your child will always be in your heart. I may only be 16, allmost 17 but if you ever need anyone to talk to please dont hesitate to talk to me and I will help you to the best of my ability. I know one thing I can do for you and thats pray for you and I will do that. God Bless

Regina

awwww thanks hon. it means a lot.... ur really bright for 16 and considerate too. thanx. feel free to pm me, so i can give u my email addy, so we can talk that way.

im really thankful i have someone close 2 my age i can talk to. i needed to hear that my baby's in heaven and stuff. thanks....

~michelle~ (alicia)

Dear Michelle,
I lost 2 children-my daughter was born @ 26 wks and lived for 47 days and my son was born @ 24 wks and only lived for a short time..........I was sooooo angry @ God for so long..but since then He has used this awful experience to allow me to counsel others. God often uses our trials to bless us later on. I know that this doesn't lessen the pain any right now(my daughter would be 20 in Oct.) but God, in His time, will heal your broken heart......

God bless you

TheWakeUpCaller said:

Dearest Michelle,
We have had several miscarriages, and I have a son named William that lived for 1 day. In the hospital parking garage with whoever was looking on, I was on my knees begging God not to take my son. After praying for an hour or so,I had a peace that I have never known. I went back and told my wife that he would live because God said everything will be all right. He died a few hours later and i was in complete shock. I could not talk, I could barely breath. The next few days were a blur in my life, and still are today. I was mad at God, but in my anger I found Him. I demanded to know why He lied to me. Why let me believe and then make a fool out of me. This is what He said to my heart " I am God and I do not lie. I promised you everything will be all right and you will be fine". Then I knew what He meant, He never said William would live.. {{sorry this has me crying now and that is ok. I am human.}} He said it would be ok. Then I remembered looking at the other kids in the NICU. I had such sorrow and compassion for them, this is when I knew I wanted to be a nurse. God never said He would live, I just thought He meant that. God's ways are not our ways. Remember this: Your son or daughter is in HEAVEN, feeling no pain, dancing with Jesus, and waiting on you. This has changed my life, especially since I know William is looking down at me, my own personal angel. God does love me, and He loves you too. If you need to cry, then cry, get it out. Its ok everything will be fine. My advice is to pray and try to do things that take your mind off of your pain. Talking with friends can go either way. Take a walk, or better yet walk to where you can see the sun rise or set. This helped me greatly. Do not let this make you bitter, its not worth it. Just so you know my Mom was raped also, this is how I was born. one last thing... For you to have been keeping your baby, says a whole lot about you. If there is anything I can do, and I do mean anything, I am a mental health nurse that works with these kinds of things. You can e-mail, private message me, or if you need a human voice, pm me and I will even give you a way to do that.................. May God bless and keep you Michelle...............Michael

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*tears* God bless.....

wow, thats tough. im so sorry. im having a rough time but im ok. i have a july stone necklace heart that i wear to remind me of the baby. i misc. in july... its hard but i'll get thru this. thanks for support and prayers. i g2g off but will be back soon. pm me if i can talk to u sometime. i felt alone til i read your replies/stories...

*tears* thats gotta be so hard. i miss my little one, but i gave the baby a name. i decided on my own it was a girl - gut feeling, so her name was alexis kayelyn. i love you babygirl. u are safe with Jesus and i will hold u when im in heaven.... i love you so much!!!! ~Mommy~

thanks for all the prayers. feel free to pm me if u need to talk/pray...

~michelle~ (alicia)

There is hope. Your little one is in the arms of Jesus. She is not dead, but alive in heaven waiting for you there! Jesus is taking good care of her. I have had four miscarriages in the past five years, but now I have two wonderful children. I know my babies are up in heaven waiting for me too. God will give you peace and understanding to help you through. We love you. *hugs!* Hannah <>< Acts 20:24