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I feel so deppressed. Please help me.

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Anonymous14

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I'm almost 15. There's this boy I like, who goes to my church, who is almost 18. I have known him for almost 6 years. I never really cared much about him. Then when I reached adolescence I couldn't stop thinking about him. He has no interest in me to be perfectly honest. This is really depressing, to like someone so much, who doesn't like you back. I wish I didn't like him. I don't know what to say to God. Sometimes I ask God 'Why do I have to like him? He has no interest in me.' And I get no answer. I don't even know how to hear God's voice.
I see this guy every Sunday in church. Sometimes every other Sunday and when he doesn't come one week I get scared I won't ever see him again. (yes i like him that much) I always try and avoid him in church which is difficult. He always talks to this girl who is 2 years older than me and he says she is his 'good friend'. I always get jealous. I'm not very pretty or anything maybe that's why. Please help me sometimes I feel suicidal. I don't know what to say or ask God. I don't want to ask God to make him like me because I'd feel selfish and stupid. And I don't want to like this guy anymore. right? Please help. I think I'm in Love with him. Please help me Lord. Please someone reply to this thread
 

paul1149

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Probably the best thing is to keep turning this over to God, in faith that He loves you and will do what is best for everyone. Then ask Him how he wants you to invest your time and attention. Feelings can be very strong at 15, but you need to keep moving forward in life, learning and developing character. So seek His guidance and be faithful to obey what He shows you, even in little things. They have a way of adding up to a whole lot over time, so don't be discouraged. This other thing may be for a later time, and the groundwork may have to be laid first. Keep trusting god with all your heart, according to Prov 3.5-6, and keep seeking His peace. It will be a protection to you.
 
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Spunkn

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Sorry you're having such a rough time with those thoughts. It can be hard when you feel attracted to someone and they don't feel that same attraction towards you. Keep praying to God to help you get through it, and to lean on God for patience. He will help you find a good person for you.
 
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Harry3142

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Anonymous14-

In order for a relationship to grow to maturity, there must not only be mutual love, but also mutual trust. Since you only know this boy in an environment (church) where he knows to be on his best behavior, the information is lacking that you would need in order for you to objectively trust him.

What you have is an infatuation. The best way to dampen an infatuation is to get to know the person that you have the infatuation for. In nearly every case knowledge alone is the best 'infatuation killer'.
 
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asiyreh

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God teaches us many lessons in this life. This particular one you're about to experience is definitely one of the most difficult ones. It's probably made all the more difficult because up to this point you've never really been hurt by love, or in your case infatuation, before.

Up to this point you've had a fairly sheltered existence. Unfortunately due to a number of factors you've chosen to step into the adult world. Life gets much more difficult in the adult world, the stakes are definitely much higher.

One day soon you're going to realise you can't have this boy. Try to understand it from his point, he's just crossed into legal adulthood and under the law, you are still regarded as a child. Despite having much in the way of educational knowledge you are still thought of legally as a child. From his point of view and that of people in your social circle observing you both. This relationship would be frowned upon... to say the least

Now look; think about it like this, there's no way this guy is going to get into a relationship with you and people to call him... "certain names," I think we both know what i'm talking about.

I see two paths for you here:

1. You take a big deep breath and a cold shower and realise this guy isn't going to put his reputation on the line despite you feeling like you're going to die if you can't have him. You accept the situation, you grow in wisdom and you keep your dignity.

2. You keep pursuing this guy, doing ever increasing embarrassing things, to get his attention, which makes you look like a crazy desperate person and eventually this guy gets so annoyed, he tells you; probably not to politely, to have no contact with him!
Everybody has a giggle at you behind you back this guy doesn't even want to speak to you much less have a relationship with you. You go home and for weeks don't stop crying, feel like someones ripped out your stomach, feel like everyones talking about you behind you back, etc etc. And maybe do something stupid.

The choice little sister is yours...
 
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Peripatetic

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I too am sorry that you are going through this. It may not be any comfort, but it is normal. Did you ever hear the term "achingly beautiful"? I think that's where it comes from... you like someone so much it almost physically hurts. Sometimes the best way to deal with those feelings is to avoid him if you can. Not in a mean way, but in a way that helps you to move on. I can assure you that you will be attracted to others, and this particular pain will not last forever.
 
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Anonymous14

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Hello thanks for the answer yes I finally grew out of liking him with Gods help. And during church I always avoid the guy, but i dont make it obvious. Say if he sits in one corner I will sit in the other. You know? But yesterday (Sunday) I was about to leave church then someone nudged me. I turned around and it was him and he said 'hey' then i said 'hi' then he said 'how you doing?' Then I said 'fine thanks' then he said 'great' Then he walked away. Its as if he trying to get me to like him. I dunno. But I still dont understand what that meant. Do you know?
 
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Anonymous14

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Hello thanks for the answer yes I finally grew out of liking him with Gods help. And during church I always avoid the guy, but i dont make it obvious. Say if he sits in one corner I will sit in the other. You know? But yesterday (Sunday) I was about to leave church then someone nudged me. I turned around and it was him and he said 'hey' then i said 'hi' then he said 'how you doing?' Then I said 'fine thanks' then he said 'great' Then he walked away. Its as if he trying to get me to like him. I dunno. But I still dont understand what that meant. Do you know?
 
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Anonymous14

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Hello thanks for the answer yes I finally grew out of liking him with Gods help. And during church I always avoid the guy, but i dont make it obvious. Say if he sits in one corner I will sit in the other. You know? But yesterday (Sunday) I was about to leave church then someone nudged me. I turned around and it was him and he said 'hey' then i said 'hi' then he said 'how you doing?' Then I said 'fine thanks' then he said 'great' Then he walked away. Its as if he trying to get me to like him. I dunno. But I still dont understand what that meant. Do you know?
 
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