i feel like killing myself...

[Dylan_Chica]

for anyone thinkin this is a cry for attention and "why does she come here to say it if she's really gonna do it", you don't know my life. 22 years of misery, 22 years of loneliness, 22 years of wishing i could have just a taste of the happiness other people experience. i've had enough. i've put a knife to my wrists two times in my life before but never had the courage to cut, so i resorted to cutting my tighs with it, as i have many times. i just can't stand any more hours crying alone in my room, wishing i was never born. i know suicide is a sin but i honesly can't take it anymore, every day is agony and depression, i become sad every time i see a happy couple, i wish i was dead every time a "friend" blows me off, i genuinly wish i never existed. i want to just go to sleep and never wake up, and unless something good happens in my life soon i can't possibly continue it.

 

[shinbits]

Darling, that's why I wanted to u to talk with me on msn.




If you don't have it, here:
http://webmessenger.msn.com/?mkt=en-us

click on "start messenger" and u can sign up real quick.


God loves you hon, as do we.

 

[Dylan_Chica]

i've added you, thanx. you ain't logged on.

 

[Dylan_Chica]

please can you log on i have no one to talk to!!!! please... i added you the second you wrote that

 

[shinbits]

logged on.

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

for anyone thinkin this is a cry for attention and "why does she come here to say it if she's really gonna do it", you don't know my life. 22 years of misery, 22 years of loneliness, 22 years of wishing i could have just a taste of the happiness other people experience. i've had enough. i've put a knife to my wrists two times in my life before but never had the courage to cut, so i resorted to cutting my tighs with it, as i have many times. i just can't stand any more hours crying alone in my room, wishing i was never born. i know suicide is a sin but i honesly can't take it anymore, every day is agony and depression, i become sad every time i see a happy couple, i wish i was dead every time a "friend" blows me off, i genuinly wish i never existed. i want to just go to sleep and never wake up, and unless something good happens in my life soon i can't possibly continue it.

My dear sister in Christ,

I'm not really sure how I can help other than hold you up in prayer. Please know that whenever you need that just pm me. I'm currently signed off from work until Wednesday so will have ample time to lift you up in prayer. Is there anyone local to you that you can maybe call right now?

One of good things of being on CF is that we get to see our fellow spiritual brothers and sisters and experience a kinship which could only occur through the Grace of our Father. Likewise, please know that your sister in the UK would be inconsolable to know that you'd no longer be with her.

Speaking from personal experience sometimes when I'm in the midst of my storms I fail to see that the ultimate One who loves us is our Heavenly Father. I've kind of gotten a tiny sample of it looking at how I'd feel if anything were to happen to my little one. The ache in my heart would be indescribable. Imagine then our Saviour who would rather die Himself so that we can live. Thats how much He loves you right now. The ache He'd feel knowing that His special daughter was no longer here would be indescribable. Please try to hold on, sis.

Please keep us posted here during this difficult time for you. I really really need to know that you're okay...

In Him

LP

 

[Splayd]

Know that you are loved.
Even though you might feel alone, know that your brothers and sisters in Christ are praying for you.

 

[linssue55]

Sweetie, please don't do anything foolish. The Lord loves you and he has a plan for your life, He is waiting for you to cast ALL of your troubles on Him, and to relax in KNOWING He WILL give you the inner peace that He KNOW'S you need. Give Him that chance. Trust COMPLETELY in Him, and forget the agonies of this world, they are not worth loosing your peace of mind.

God does have a plan for you, it was created in eternity past, with all the blessings that He has for you right now in time. Trust in HIM, and forget those that want to hurt you. Be strong, you will pull through this with the Lord's help. Use 1 John 1:9, and Rom 8:28. But you must trust in the Lord. He has SOOOOO much waiting for you, if you give Him the chance.

Just tell the Lord you are trusting in Him, and say "Lord here is this weight that I am carrying, and I am buckling under it's weight. I cannot endure it any longer. I give it to you, knowing that you will give me comfort and peace of mind. Lord I put my life in your hands, and I will no longer be burdend with the things of this world, and you will fill my plate for me, and I will eat from it, knowing you love me so very much, that I am your child and you will take care of me. I am trusting in you Lord, and you will give me peace. Thank you my Lord". He WILL give you what your soul needs, this is a promise, but you first must hand over to Him ALL of your pains and anguish. I will pray for you, pray to give you strength, and to wait patiently on the Lord, for He WILL give you the desires of your heart. He died for you so you could live, don't waste this gift.

You can PM me anytime sweetie.

 

[nephilimiyr]

I'll be praying for you Dylan. Just know that there are people who care and want to help. And if you don't believe that I believe that God loves and cares for you more than you will ever know!

 

[Silver-winged Flyer]

I know your life may not seem worth living now but it is. God wouldn't have created you if He didn't have a purpose for your life. Please talk to somebody, we can support you but not give you the help that a professional can. Please keep posting on the forum so we know how you're doing. I'm very concerned for you even though I don't know you.

Please don't give up.

 

[tapero]

Dear Dylan chica,

I tried to pm you but your box is full. You need to delete some of your messages. Send me a pm when you empty your pm box so I can write to you. I am worried about you and feel bad that you feel so badly. Will write more in the pm. Love, tapero

 

[shinbits]

Dylan.......

 

[She]

Hi Dylan, I met you over on OBOB earlier today. I hope that you are feeling better today. I'm feeling a bit depressed today. That's why I'm here.

Please don't give up hope. At your age things WILL get better. You will have a much happier future.
God bless.

 

[JohnR7]

22 years of misery, 22 years of loneliness, 22 years of wishing i could have just a taste of the happiness other people experience.

This is basicly just a lie. You need to quit listening to the enemy of God and start to listen to what God has to say about it. You need to quit walking in darkness and walk in the light. The devil may try to deliver his package to your door, but you do not have to accept delivery of it.

Genesis 4:7
If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it."

 

[Rosa Mystica]

for anyone thinkin this is a cry for attention and "why does she come here to say it if she's really gonna do it", you don't know my life. 22 years of misery, 22 years of loneliness, 22 years of wishing i could have just a taste of the happiness other people experience. i've had enough. i've put a knife to my wrists two times in my life before but never had the courage to cut, so i resorted to cutting my tighs with it, as i have many times. i just can't stand any more hours crying alone in my room, wishing i was never born. i know suicide is a sin but i honesly can't take it anymore, every day is agony and depression, i become sad every time i see a happy couple, i wish i was dead every time a "friend" blows me off, i genuinly wish i never existed. i want to just go to sleep and never wake up, and unless something good happens in my life soon i can't possibly continue it.

Oh, sweetie!

I've been there, too. I didn't have a relationship until I was 22. My sweetie didn't have one until he was 32- yes, ten years older than me. But guess what? He found love. You will too. However, you can't do this- or achieve any other life goal- if you do yourself in. And suicide *is* wrong. Think of all the people you'd be hurting if you went through with it.

PM me if you want. I'm clinically depressed myself, and somehow managed to overcome suicidality last year. I want you to live, sweetie. Please don't go through with this. Dead is forever.

Rosa

 

[sistagirl]

for anyone thinkin this is a cry for attention and "why does she come here to say it if she's really gonna do it", you don't know my life. 22 years of misery, 22 years of loneliness, 22 years of wishing i could have just a taste of the happiness other people experience. i've had enough. i've put a knife to my wrists two times in my life before but never had the courage to cut, so i resorted to cutting my tighs with it, as i have many times. i just can't stand any more hours crying alone in my room, wishing i was never born. i know suicide is a sin but i honesly can't take it anymore, every day is agony and depression, i become sad every time i see a happy couple, i wish i was dead every time a "friend" blows me off, i genuinly wish i never existed. i want to just go to sleep and never wake up, and unless something good happens in my life soon i can't possibly continue it.

thats right i dont kno ur life but there is someone who does GOD......he knos wat ur going through..he knos the pain ur feelin and i just feel on my heart that u need to trust in the lord trust and give faith a fightin chance thats wat pastor reggie dabbs said to my church.....May the lord heal ur pain pain u find shelter in his word may u find guildance and the love he has for you cause it says in the bible that god knew all the days of ure life before you were born and i pray that god will lift you up may the holy spirit be with you in ure time of need and that he will shower you with his abundance of love,guildance and that you will find not loneliness or emptyness but fulfilness in our lord and saviour may god stir ure heart with passion and love love for him god bless ure sista in christ......

 

[brokenbeliever]

hi dylan chica,
i have felt the way you described too. in fact, when i got suicidal i put myself in the hospital. i had to have my meds changed a few times till i found the right one. perhaps you need a change in meds. it is worth it to help you feel better and cope with life. but besides all that, you do have hope. i have been off meds for about 3-4 years now and i believe God has healed me of the depression. i know He can do this for you too. but like i said in the meantime please see your dr and make sure you're on the right meds, ok hon.
love in Christ,
bb

 

[BelovedWord]

Hi Dylan_Chica,

I spoke to you last night on MSN. I am sorry that you feel this way. I am always online and ready to talk to you. You can also email me from my profile. I will make time for you. Hang in there my friend, I care about you.

In His Service,
Brian