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i cannot go on like this
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Yes i know he is, but i have to want him to help me......
sorry but just a real horrible day, somedays are just not worth it.....
but thanks.
sorry but just a real horrible day, somedays are just not worth it.....
but thanks.
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amtvball4jesus
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honey,
calm down and take a breather. it'll be ok. u have 5 kids, remember???? they need you more than anything
calm down and take a breather. it'll be ok. u have 5 kids, remember???? they need you more than anything
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goldenviolet
Holy is the Lord God Almighty
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"you can't go on", says you are weary. it also says you have alot fight in you.
i wrote on your other thread this:
denise, take hold of the fact that you are trying. remember at one time these things were a secret. you still have come along ways. don't seach out the negative. search for all of the positive. be happy and content that you are getting some help, and be hopeful that everything works for the good of those who love the Lord.
your soul is secure with God. now you just need to pick up your cross and produce fruit.
you have to go on, your children need you. your family needs you. one thing at a time. you are being seen and searching help. this is right. this is your one thing for now. it is blossoms of fruit to come. hang in there.
i wrote on your other thread this:
denise, take hold of the fact that you are trying. remember at one time these things were a secret. you still have come along ways. don't seach out the negative. search for all of the positive. be happy and content that you are getting some help, and be hopeful that everything works for the good of those who love the Lord.
your soul is secure with God. now you just need to pick up your cross and produce fruit.you have to go on, your children need you. your family needs you. one thing at a time. you are being seen and searching help. this is right. this is your one thing for now. it is blossoms of fruit to come. hang in there.
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This is all because i actually ate today, how sick is that????/it is messing with my head so much that i swear there is a battle going on in there and i want to run from it, my own head
but you can't so now i will go push myself to the limit with a jog, and maybe clear my head????
but you can't so now i will go push myself to the limit with a jog, and maybe clear my head????
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feeling better now, went for a jog/walk....1 1/2 hrs..... cleared my head...Thank you for all your help in my desperate time of need......you are all wonderful and i have been blessed with all your advice
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Music4Hym777
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blessedmomof5 said:
I'm glad youre feeling better! I know it is never easy. I went through the same things of wanting to run from my own head......sometimes I still do, but in everything, God works in His time in His way. There is no way around God. I know youre stuggling! Know that you can PM me anytime!
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Thanks Monica,
That means alot to me, and if i do i will pm you, but i am afraid to trigger people, so i tend not to.........here at least you have the choice to read it or not.....
i hope all is well with you.
the one thing i wish is that i had stayed the extra days they wanted me to, but would that really have helped and if i had listen to there advice more....but thats in the past and if i ever need to go back IP then i will be the one that listens the most........i am tired of the noise in my head....and being a burden.....
In Christ
Denise
That means alot to me, and if i do i will pm you, but i am afraid to trigger people, so i tend not to.........here at least you have the choice to read it or not.....
i hope all is well with you.
the one thing i wish is that i had stayed the extra days they wanted me to, but would that really have helped and if i had listen to there advice more....but thats in the past and if i ever need to go back IP then i will be the one that listens the most........i am tired of the noise in my head....and being a burden.....
In Christ
Denise
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Music4Hym777
Daughter of Christ
blessedmomof5 said:
Hey Denise,
Dont worry about triggering me, I dont trigger that easily anymore like I use to. If in the future you do decide to go back IP, then let it be YOUR choice. Not the doctors. Remember, this is all about your choices, other people can force you into things, but YOU have to decide whether or not you want to go through the work of getting better. It might be at first that you are getting better so that your girls have a "mom", but I can guarantee you, that once you start down the road to recovery on your own terms and with you being the one that wants it, it is just a matter of time before you are getting better for you!
Monica
P.S. You are NOT a burden!
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Mr Cheese, thanks for the hug, most people need them......
Monica, I so agree with you, forcing me did not work, and it was so rushed i barely had time to think....i just wish i could eat like a "normal" person. but that is very hard for me right now...thanks for the pm offer, if i ever get like i did yesterday, when death seemed like a good choice i will reach out.
thank you again....
Denise
Monica, I so agree with you, forcing me did not work, and it was so rushed i barely had time to think....i just wish i could eat like a "normal" person. but that is very hard for me right now...thanks for the pm offer, if i ever get like i did yesterday, when death seemed like a good choice i will reach out.
thank you again....
Denise
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luv4godremains
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hey Denise, hope you're ok, and stil feeling better.
take care of yourself and pray, lots. I'm praying for ya and know that God is gonna be right by your side the whole way through this battle, and, when you say it feels like there's a battle going on inside your head, it's true, there is, andGod will win in the end!
God bless and take care, pm me if ya ever need to chat!
take care of yourself and pray, lots. I'm praying for ya and know that God is gonna be right by your side the whole way through this battle, and, when you say it feels like there's a battle going on inside your head, it's true, there is, andGod will win in the end!
God bless and take care, pm me if ya ever need to chat!
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Music4Hym777
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blessedmomof5 said:
Yeah, you have to have time to think things through. What I did and have put on my bulletin by my computer is a list of all the Pro's to hanging on to my eating disorder, and all the Pro's to Recovery. In the end, the recovery seemed like the better choice, so thats what I did. I know that I would be happier, healthier, and that I could live my life to the fullest. My eating disorder was also affecting relationships, so I opted to get better. It really has to be up to you though. People will always be there for you, no mater what! I know it sucks going through it, but think about the awesome testimony you could have to say that you were at the lowest point in your life and through the help of God you were able to get things back together. I'll be continuing to pray for you!
~Monica
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Just wanted to say thanks and how very blessed i am, to have you all here for me, even when i am not here for me.......but feeling better today, didn't eat much, but was capable of sitting with my family and having a small dinner, and i did not go for a jog.......thinking it is best today bc of the chest pains.....
although i went shoppping and spent way to much.....but oh well.......
Denise
MarlenaM,
If you mean with an Ed i have anorexia, but will every now and again if i eat purge it.....sorry for the graphics.....just got out of IP, and finding it real hard to deal with........now i am going over to your post to read it....
although i went shoppping and spent way to much.....but oh well.......
Denise
MarlenaM,
If you mean with an Ed i have anorexia, but will every now and again if i eat purge it.....sorry for the graphics.....just got out of IP, and finding it real hard to deal with........now i am going over to your post to read it....
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