Hurt by another member *trig*

[pockleberry]

Hey guys I guess I just want some advice and some reasurance that I made the right decision.

Recently I've been talking to another member of this forum who for thier sake I will not name. I was getting on with them fine and I felt that we were able to help each other out and talk about our experiences in a way that useful for each other.

The other night I was feeling particulary bad and I decided to talk to this person about how I was feeling. He talked to me about why and what they thought I should do...I went ofline planning to atempt suicide but God got in my way and my mum found out how I was feeling.

I felt bad about making this person worry about me so I decided to go online briefly to apolagise for the things I had said as I know from experience how bad it feels to know that someone is planning to kill themselves. I wanted to let them know that I was ok and was no longer struggerling with these feelings on my own.

When I spoke to this person they started accusing me of lying to them implying that I had made up how I was feeling. I have tried telling them that I would not and have not lied about anything but they are still refusing to belive me. This hurt me alot to be accused of doing something that I haven't especially of something that I would never do as I don't believe it would be right or fair to do that to anyone.

I've decided not to talk to this person anymore but am worried that I am being unreasonable. Should I give them another chance and forget that they have attacked my honesty and character? I really don't know what the right thing to do is I don't want to get hurt again but neither do I want to be seen as a nasty or dishonest person.

Please somebody give me some advice

 

[Im-revived]

Don't worry Love, whoever has said this to you had no right, and its actually against the rules to accuse someone of lying about suicide. Everycase should be taken seriously, you need to make the decision now yourself on wether to have continued conversations with him. My suggesstion would be Forgive him, leave it and see if he contacts you, if not leave it completely, you don't need people with this attitude at the moment and they obviously don't know much about compassion, consideration, or offering advice.

God Bless

Im-revived

Hey guys I guess I just want some advice and some reasurance that I made the right decision.

Recently I've been talking to another member of this forum who for thier sake I will not name. I was getting on with them fine and I felt that we were able to help each other out and talk about our experiences in a way that useful for each other.

The other night I was feeling particulary bad and I decided to talk to this person about how I was feeling. He talked to me about why and what they thought I should do...I went ofline planning to atempt suicide but God got in my way and my mum found out how I was feeling.

I felt bad about making this person worry about me so I decided to go online briefly to apolagise for the things I had said as I know from experience how bad it feels to know that someone is planning to kill themselves. I wanted to let them know that I was ok and was no longer struggerling with these feelings on my own.

When I spoke to this person they started accusing me of lying to them implying that I had made up how I was feeling. I have tried telling them that I would not and have not lied about anything but they are still refusing to belive me. This hurt me alot to be accused of doing something that I haven't especially of something that I would never do as I don't believe it would be right or fair to do that to anyone.

I've decided not to talk to this person anymore but am worried that I am being unreasonable. Should I give them another chance and forget that they have attacked my honesty and character? I really don't know what the right thing to do is I don't want to get hurt again but neither do I want to be seen as a nasty or dishonest person.

Please somebody give me some advice

 

[Darrell2006]

Hey guys I guess I just want some advice and some reasurance that I made the right decision.

Recently I've been talking to another member of this forum who for thier sake I will not name. I was getting on with them fine and I felt that we were able to help each other out and talk about our experiences in a way that useful for each other.

The other night I was feeling particulary bad and I decided to talk to this person about how I was feeling. He talked to me about why and what they thought I should do...I went ofline planning to atempt suicide but God got in my way and my mum found out how I was feeling.

I felt bad about making this person worry about me so I decided to go online briefly to apolagise for the things I had said as I know from experience how bad it feels to know that someone is planning to kill themselves. I wanted to let them know that I was ok and was no longer struggerling with these feelings on my own.

When I spoke to this person they started accusing me of lying to them implying that I had made up how I was feeling. I have tried telling them that I would not and have not lied about anything but they are still refusing to belive me. This hurt me alot to be accused of doing something that I haven't especially of something that I would never do as I don't believe it would be right or fair to do that to anyone.

I've decided not to talk to this person anymore but am worried that I am being unreasonable. Should I give them another chance and forget that they have attacked my honesty and character? I really don't know what the right thing to do is I don't want to get hurt again but neither do I want to be seen as a nasty or dishonest person.

Please somebody give me some advice

I just returned your personal message, but let me clarify, the night you said you were suicidal, I was going to call the police in your country, I tried to look up your name in the directory to give to the police, I was concerned because I did'nt know how to help you from another country, I contacted another memeber of the forum and they suggested you were online but had your messanger turned off,and that I should email you, so I did, and within minutes you emailed me back,you said you talked to your mom, so I felt a little better since someone at your house was with you. before this I was trying to look up your name and address to give to the police, but I found several listings of your first initial and last name so I could'nt have even called the police because I had no info ecxept your computer address.
You then became worried that I would have had your address, wich made me think that if your suicidal why were you worried about me having your address, besides If I could have gotten your address it would have been to call police to save your life. It just made me think that I was maybe being played, If your weren't I'm really truely Sorry for saying so, this online support is new to me, and I just want to make sure that you and others I speak to are being honest about who they are.
I hope that clarifys everything.

Daryl

 

[sydney3]

Hey guys I guess I just want some advice and some reasurance that I made the right decision.

Recently I've been talking to another member of this forum who for thier sake I will not name. I was getting on with them fine and I felt that we were able to help each other out and talk about our experiences in a way that useful for each other.

The other night I was feeling particulary bad and I decided to talk to this person about how I was feeling. He talked to me about why and what they thought I should do...I went ofline planning to atempt suicide but God got in my way and my mum found out how I was feeling.

I felt bad about making this person worry about me so I decided to go online briefly to apolagise for the things I had said as I know from experience how bad it feels to know that someone is planning to kill themselves. I wanted to let them know that I was ok and was no longer struggerling with these feelings on my own.

When I spoke to this person they started accusing me of lying to them implying that I had made up how I was feeling. I have tried telling them that I would not and have not lied about anything but they are still refusing to belive me. This hurt me alot to be accused of doing something that I haven't especially of something that I would never do as I don't believe it would be right or fair to do that to anyone.

I've decided not to talk to this person anymore but am worried that I am being unreasonable. Should I give them another chance and forget that they have attacked my honesty and character? I really don't know what the right thing to do is I don't want to get hurt again but neither do I want to be seen as a nasty or dishonest person.

Please somebody give me some advice

I had spent several years thinking of sucide before I tried to take my life. Once I tried to cut my wrist, the next I bought sleeping pills but did not take them. The last time I bought 64 sleeping pills and took them all. I am alive today only by the will of God. I understand that you may have thoughts like these and later decide not to act on them. Don't let anyone make you feel bad for making them worry. Talk of sucide is a cry for help! Just remember that God loves you and will help you during these times. Please pray and ask him for help, he is our comforter. God bless you!

 

[UnitynLove]

Many people ruin their lives and their health by eating the poison of bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness. Matthew 18:23-35 tells us that, if we do not forgive people, we get turned over to the torturers. If you have a problem in this area or have ever had one, I am sure you bear witness with what I am saying. It is torture to have hateful thoughts rolling around inside of you toward another person.
Who Are You Helping When You Forgive?
Who are you helping the most when you forgive the person who hurt you? Actually, you are helping yourself more than the other person. I always looked at forgiving people who had hurt me as being a really hard thing to do. I thought it seemed so unfair for them to receive forgiveness when I had gotten hurt. I got pain, and they got free without having to pay for the pain they caused me. Now I realized that I am helping myself when I choose to forgive. I am helping the other person also by releasing them, so God can do what only He can do. If I am in the way, trying to get revenge or taking care of the situation myself instead of trusting and obeying God, He has no obligation to deal with that person. However, God will deal with the people who hurt us if we will put them in His hands through forgiveness. It is our seed of obedience to His Word; and once we have sown our seed, He will bring a harvest of blessing to us one way or another.
I am helping myself, because when I forgive I release God to work. I am happy when I am not full of the poison of unforgiveness. I feel better physically. Serious diseases can come as a result of the stress and pressure that bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness put on a person. Mark 11:22-26 clearly teaches us that unforgiveness hinders our faith from working. The Father cannot forgive our sins if we do not forgive other people (we reap what we sow). Sow mercy, and you will reap mercy; sow judgement, and you will reap judgement. Do yourself a favor and forgive.
There are still more benefits of forgiveness. When you are willing to forgive, your fellowship with God has a free flow. Unforgiveness blocks it. Paul said that we are to forgive in order to keep Satan from getting an advantage over us (11 Corinthians 2: 10-11). Ephesians 4:26-27 says that we are not to let the sun go down on our anger. Do not give the devil any such foothold or opportunity. Remember that the devil must have a foothold before he can get a stronghold. Be quick to forgive. Do not help the devil torture you. I also think it is hard to hate one person and love another. When we are full of wrong things, it is hard to treat anybody right. Even people you want to love may be suffering from your bitterness, resentment and unforgiveness.
How To Forgive
Like everything else, there are practical steps to forgiving people that must be taken if we are going to be successful at it. I asked the Lord why so many people seem to want to forgive and yet are not successful doing it. He said, "because they are not obeying what I tell them to do in the Word." As I searched the Word, I found the following instructions:
1. Decide. You will never forgive if you wait to feel like it. Choose to obey God and steadfastly resist the devil in his attempts to poison you again with bitter thoughts. Make a quality decision, and God will heal your wounded emotions in due time.
2. Depend. You cannot forgive without the power of the Holy Spirit. It is too hard to do on your own. If you are truly willing, God will enable you; but you are going to need to humble yourself and cry out to Him for help. In John 20:22-23, Jesus breathed on the disciples and said, "Receive the Holy Spirit. " His next instruction was about forgiving people. We certainly can use this as an example and ask Him to breathe on us that we might be able to forgive those who hurt us.
3. Obey. There are several things we are told do in the Word concerning forgiving our enemies.
a. Pray for your enemies and those who abuse and misuse you. Pray for their happiness and welfare (Luke 6:27-28 Amplified). As you pray, God may be able to give them revelation that will bring them out of deception. They may not even be aware they hurt you, or maybe they are aware but are so self-centered that they do not care. Either way, they need revelation.
b. Bless and do not curse them (Romans 12:14). In the Greek, to bless means "to speak well of" and to curse means "to speak evil of." You cannot forgive and gossip or be a talebearer. You must stop repeating the offense. You cannot get over it and also continue to talk about it. Proverbs 17:9 says that he who seeks to cover an offense seeks love.
Who Should Forgive?
Forgive the person from long ago who hurt you very badly and also the person whom you did not know in the grocery store, for stepping on your toe. Take those two extremes and forgive them in addition to everyone in between. Forgive quickly. The quicker you do it, the easier it is. Forgive freely. Matthew 10:8 says freely you have received, freely give. Forgiveness means to excuse a fault, absolve from payment, pardon, send away, cancel, and bestow favor unconditionally.
When you forgive, you must cancel the debt. Do not spend your life paying and collecting debts. Hebrews 10:30 says that vengeance belongs to the Lord; He will repay and settle the cases of His people. Let God pay you for past injustices; do not try to collect from the people who hurt you, because the people who hurt you cannot pay you. Matthew 18:25 says ..."he could not pay".
Also forgive yourself for past sins and for hurts you have caused others. You cannot pay people back, so ask God to.
Forgive God if you are angry at Him because your life did not turn out the way you thought it should. God is always just. There may be things you do not understand; but God loves you, and people make a serious mistake if they will not receive help from the only One who can truly help.
You may even need to forgive an object—the post office, bank, a certain store you feel cheated you, a car that always gave you trouble, etc. Get rid of all poison that comes from bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness; and remember Proverbs 4:23 (Amplified), "Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance...for out of it flow the springs of life." Unforgiveness is spiritual filthiness; get washed in the water of the Word and stay clean. God bless you!

 

[pockleberry]

Thankyou for all your replies I have forgiven him I know that he didn't mean to hurt me and that holding a grudge against him is not going to do any good for anyone especially not me...

 

[ArmouredSaint]

I believe when others try to help in a situation where they don't really know a person i.e. the internet-things will always strike up a cold arrow. Best to get into a one on one counseling situation rather than chat to someone on here.
I go to a nightly church meet where 15-21 year olds meet,and there is always a doc there. Hope you will be with us awhile. Don't sell yourself short. Life can be very good.