How Was Your's

[gracechick]

I've been reading lately about the subject & find many articles say that many families of origin of BD & APD were reserved, critical &/or abusive in some manner.

Mine is Christian, but we lacked any emotional encouragment & my dad was very critical & controlling. They loved us & would do anything for me & my sisters, but it was tough growing up.
I wonder how much this truely affected me & what Im dealing with now. I know Im a sensitive person, but I still can't help but think things would have turned out more positive for me had our family life been less dysfuntional. At least my sisters were affected in some ways, but thank God not like me...wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Well thanks for letting me rant Few.

Any comments welcome!

 

[goldenviolet]

bless your heart.

my pastor once said it's a matter of learning. you need X years to re-learn what you have learned. sometimes BP seems like this. like we are adult children re-learning the right way about life. the non-abusive ways.

 

[Ave Maria]

My childhood was well... dysfunctional for the most part but it had its good parts too.

 

[madison1101]

I had a pretty cruddy childhood, with mom being bipolar and dad being alcoholic. Each of my siblings are in therapy or on meds, but I was the only BPDer. It could have something to do with sexual abuse added to my dysfunctional upbringing.

I spent a long time angry at God for my childhood and the abuse. One day I finally realized I had to play the hand I was dealt in life, and couldn't fold or throw in my chips. I asked God what He wanted me to do with my life and He showed me.

Getting therapy has helped me unlearn the behaviors and heal the wounds. Serving God with my gifts, which I believe are a result of my childhood, is blessing me more than I could have ever imagined.

Hugs,
Trish

 

[gracechick]

I had a pretty cruddy childhood, with mom being bipolar and dad being alcoholic. Each of my siblings are in therapy or on meds, but I was the only BPDer. It could have something to do with sexual abuse added to my dysfunctional upbringing.

I spent a long time angry at God for my childhood and the abuse. One day I finally realized I had to play the hand I was dealt in life, and couldn't fold or throw in my chips. I asked God what He wanted me to do with my life and He showed me.

Getting therapy has helped me unlearn the behaviors and heal the wounds. Serving God with my gifts, which I believe are a result of my childhood, is blessing me more than I could have ever imagined.

Hugs,
Trish

That is tough Madison.

I said a prayer that God will continue to heal the hurts of you past.
I truely admire your strength.

 

[angelluv]

Yeah, my childhood was pretty bad. I had a father who abused me physically, and always told me how he felt about what I was. I had a mom who just stood there and did nothing to stop him.

I have noticed that as a BPDer I'm just like a big child. I would act very immature. And that was part of the reason I was suspended from college.

But BPD is not very fun to have, but I'm just dealing with the cards I've been dealt. And I know that I will totally be okay in the end. Especially with Gods help.

 

[PETE_]

Realizing how bad I have screwed up at times raising my own kids has made me far less critical of my own parents "mistakes".

They loved us & would do anything for me & my sisters

Unfortunately many do not have parents that even try.

 

[EbonNelumbo]

Abusive. Mistrustful. Hurtful.

 

[jess144]

My childhood was pretty traumatic at times. My mom had a mental illness and would sometimes become psychotic or severly depressed. She is a wonderful, caring person though, and she treated us very well when she wasn't sick (and she actually took pretty good care of us even when she was sick). I think that I was traumatized more by my parent's fighting. They weren't abusive towards one another...but the house usually felt very unsafe.
I go through times where I try to figure out what specifically happened that caused me to turn out like this (anxious and depressed and feeling empty). I just don't know. My counselor told me that people can be permanently affected by trauma that happens to them when they are an infant!! I guess I was in an incubator for the first few days of my life. My dad told me that afterwards I was very hard to hold....I would just stay stiff if someone was holding me and I wouldn't mold to the other person's body like most babies do. Interesting. Maybe that is part of the reason I have a hard time with relationships?? Hmmm....Kinda seems unfair, though. That one seemingly insignificant event could permanently make it hard for me to relate to others....

 

[madison1101]

My childhood was pretty traumatic at times. My mom had a mental illness and would sometimes become psychotic or severly depressed. She is a wonderful, caring person though, and she treated us very well when she wasn't sick (and she actually took pretty good care of us even when she was sick). I think that I was traumatized more by my parent's fighting. They weren't abusive towards one another...but the house usually felt very unsafe.
I go through times where I try to figure out what specifically happened that caused me to turn out like this (anxious and depressed and feeling empty). I just don't know. My counselor told me that people can be permanently affected by trauma that happens to them when they are an infant!! I guess I was in an incubator for the first few days of my life. My dad told me that afterwards I was very hard to hold....I would just stay stiff if someone was holding me and I wouldn't mold to the other person's body like most babies do. Interesting. Maybe that is part of the reason I have a hard time with relationships?? Hmmm....Kinda seems unfair, though. That one seemingly insignificant event could permanently make it hard for me to relate to others....

My father was abusive toward my mom. That made me feel terrified most of my life.

Hugs,
Trish