I think this has been on before but.........
Subject: How To Tell If You're From Iowa
You measure distance in minutes.
Down south to you means Missouri.
You have no problem spelling or pronouncing "Des Moines."
You know the answer to the question "Is this Heaven?"
Your school classes were cancelled because of cold.
Your school classes were cancelled because of heat.
You know what "Hawks" and "Clones" are.
You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way.
You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.
Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no
matter what time of the year.
You end your sentences with an unnecessary exposition. Example: "Where's my
coat at?"
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit or vegetable.
You can locate Iowa on the United States map.
Detassling was your first job.
Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big as
the bun and accompanied only by ketchup and a dill pickle slice.
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked.
When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say "It was
different."
You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor.
People from other states love to hear you say "Iowa" and other words with
"Os" in them.
You drink "pop."
Subject: How To Tell If You're From Iowa
You measure distance in minutes.
Down south to you means Missouri.
You have no problem spelling or pronouncing "Des Moines."
You know the answer to the question "Is this Heaven?"
Your school classes were cancelled because of cold.
Your school classes were cancelled because of heat.
You know what "Hawks" and "Clones" are.
You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way.
You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.
Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no
matter what time of the year.
You end your sentences with an unnecessary exposition. Example: "Where's my
coat at?"
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit or vegetable.
You can locate Iowa on the United States map.
Detassling was your first job.
Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big as
the bun and accompanied only by ketchup and a dill pickle slice.
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked.
When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say "It was
different."
You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor.
People from other states love to hear you say "Iowa" and other words with
"Os" in them.
You drink "pop."
