How to Approach

[Kkisjjang]

I came to receive some advice from my fellow brothers and sisters.

I just found out that one of my sister in church, her mother passed away last night due to cancer. Her mother was same age as my own mother and died at a young age. My fullest condolence.

My sister is out of country and she will return in a week. I wanted to know how to approach her when I see her again at church on Sunday.


What should I say when I first see her?
I want to give her a hug and show her my condolence but I don't know how to go do that. Can someone help me? I am a male college student and she is one year older than me and since now, I have never gone through this.

 

[shout2thelord]

hi, my mum died about 3 years ago now so i know how people feel. Just try to act normally just talk to her ask how shes doing. I always felt most comfortable when my friends were just chatting to me and not acting weird incase tehy said the wrong thing. Just be there and say your there if she needs to talk.
thats all i can think of

 

[girlscoutdropout]

i slight touch and an "i'm so sorry to hear about your mom" would do it i'm sure. i'm sure she's feeling awkward and feeling lie people are avoiding her. let her know that she can talk to you.

 

[rach]

I agree with all other statements and think you should just make sure she knows you're there if she needs to talk. Be the shoulder she can cry on too, because sometimes I just want someone to hold me and comfort me while I cry. I don't want them to say anything to me, but just be there to support me.

 

[AngelAmidala]

I know when I lost my grandparents (3 over a span of 9 months) all I wanted was someone for me to hug and cry on...whether it was a friend or a relative. The most reassuring thing to me was hugs. If you're in a church that regularly hugs in greeting it would not be inappropriate for you to give her a reassuring hug and let her know you're there if she ever needs to talk or just sit with someone.

And let her know you're praying for her.

 

[DeputyDan]

1) Send her a card and tell her that you are sorry for her loss.

2) Briefly tell her you are sorry for her loss and give her a brief hug, etc. Let her expand any discussion. If she is not receptive, you will know and just abide by that instinct.