How many kids. . .

ido · Feb 19, 2009

JonMiller said:
A lot of western people are very selfish, so because it isn't econimcally advantageous they don't want to have children.

JM

That's just rude to say. Unless you are a person that doesn't want children and are sharing YOUR reason for not wanting children then I don't think you have the right to speculate on why they don't want children.

Mrs. Luther073082 · Feb 19, 2009

As many as God wants me to have.

Tamara224 · Feb 19, 2009

I would like 4. But I'll take however many God blesses me with.

LostFound1986 · Feb 19, 2009

JonMiller said:
A lot of western people are very selfish, so because it isn't econimcally advantageous they don't want to have children.

JM

Surely its better for selfish people not to have kids? Also, why is it selfish not to want kids? Surely its much more selfish to have them and then be a rubbish parent and not care for them. Many places in the world that suffer from famines are also the places where it is culturally normal to have a very large family. I think only those who have a strong desire to have children should do so.

WileyCoyote · Feb 19, 2009

A big family would be nice. Three at the minimum. 30 at the max.

Inkachu · Feb 19, 2009

flnativegrl said:
It's funny - b/c I'm one of those people that always had a strong conviction that I would be a parent. It never really occurred to me that there would be people that were just as strongly convicted against having children. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with it - just that I never really thought about it.

And isn't it ironic that I was one of those "I never wanna have kids" people, and look at me now lol. It wasn't that I hated kids or had some uber-feminist agenda; I just wanted to travel the world and write books and breed dogs and climb mountains and do lots of adventurous things. Settling down and living in a house for 50 years NEVER appealed to me (and still doesn't lol). God obviously had a slightly different plan for my life, lol. I still hope to do all my big dreamy dreams, just a little later down the road

Inkachu · Feb 19, 2009

To those of you who have said "as many as God blesses me with" - are you going to use B.C. at all? If you ended up having one after the other, would you just keep on going, till you passed menopause? I'm just curious.

Blank123 · Feb 19, 2009

possibly 4-5, but that all depends on God's will, financial situation, what my FH is comfortable with, etc... could be more, could be less and i do hope to adopt some kids as well.

LostFound1986 · Feb 19, 2009

I would like 3. Lots of my family seem to have three seems like a good number. Also, and this is very odd...every single one of my male relatives who are older than me have got married at 24. Every one without exception I know of 12 of them. Talk about pressure

JonMiller · Feb 19, 2009

LostFound1986 said:
Surely its better for selfish people not to have kids? Also, why is it selfish not to want kids? Surely its much more selfish to have them and then be a rubbish parent and not care for them. Many places in the world that suffer from famines are also the places where it is culturally normal to have a very large family. I think only those who have a strong desire to have children should do so.

Even people who are rubbish parents in the first world produce many children who are productive and happy and help ease the problems of those who are lacking in the world.

The difference between first world and third world is in the third world they value family and tribe, while we mostly just value the individual. Yeah, that makes us more seflish, we just value ourselves. Maybe most importantly though, it is economically beneficial to have a large family in the poorer areas, they can have their children help out around, and there isn't that much cost for having a child if things go bad ( the child just dies or is sold to slavery or etc).

A lot of the problems today, in first world nations, is the lack of those who can provide education and resources to their children having children. So instead, you have old people living longer and longer, hoarding their wealth for themselves and when they die it goes to a few other people who are hoarding their wealth for themsevles.

JM

Jon Miller

Niels · Feb 19, 2009

As many as God blesses me with. We will use birth control... but I figure that covers happy accidents & the possibility that we can't have kids. If you want a raw number, 0-4 sounds about right.

Tamara224 · Feb 19, 2009

Inkabink said:
To those of you who have said "as many as God blesses me with" - are you going to use B.C. at all? If you ended up having one after the other, would you just keep on going, till you passed menopause? I'm just curious.

I've thought about this a lot and I still don't really know the answer to this question. I think it will depend a lot on what my FH and I decide we want to do as a couple. I, personally, have some serious reservations about BC - especially the ones that jack with a woman's hormones. I think that there may be serious health risks involved that do not get published. Not to mention that I have qualms about any BC that works by allowing fertilization but not implantation - which, some argue (and rather persuasively) is abortion.

Considering my age... if and when I do get married I think there won't be any plan to wait a few years before having kids - I'm already past the ideal child-bearing age. So I doubt I'll want to use BC at first.

I have considered the possibility of a tubal ligation or vasectomy if/when we decide we've had enough children. This will depend on my health, our children's health, our income, my husband's input, and most importantly what we believe God is directing us to do.

white dove · Feb 19, 2009

I used to think that I wanted 3 kids, one of them having been adopted. Now that I've seen what it's like to have 3, I have seriously re-considered. If or when I do get married, that's something that will be discussed between my husband and myself. We'll talk it over and see where we stand (this would've probably have been done during the dating process as well) and pray about it - see what happens. If I do not get married, I would like to adopt one child - preferably one that is a little "older" and thus, considered "unadoptable" to many.

So far, in my dating life I have never been with any man that wanted to have a bus-load of children. Me, personally, I wouldn't choose that. Financially and otherwise, it just wouldn't be a wise choice for me. I think 2 children would be more than enough to have in the house, but who knows what will happen. Only One person who does.

frenzy · Feb 19, 2009

Zero.

Marycita · Feb 19, 2009

I really really really would love to adopt as many as possible..including older children...but who knows what will happen

Flashlight · Feb 19, 2009

No Kids for me.

LostFound1986 · Feb 19, 2009

But the point is, even if a society values family ties greatly, if you are going to have so many children that they can't be fed you're still going to cause more suffering. Also, while it may have been economically wise to have a large family up until a few decades ago in these countries, it just isn't true in the modern world.

With regards to the hoarding of wealth...well, if they earned their money they are entitled to it. They have a duty to give some money as charity, but in the end we all have to earn our wealth.

JonMiller said:
Even people who are rubbish parents in the first world produce many children who are productive and happy and help ease the problems of those who are lacking in the world.

The difference between first world and third world is in the third world they value family and tribe, while we mostly just value the individual. Yeah, that makes us more seflish, we just value ourselves. Maybe most importantly though, it is economically beneficial to have a large family in the poorer areas, they can have their children help out around, and there isn't that much cost for having a child if things go bad ( the child just dies or is sold to slavery or etc).

A lot of the problems today, in first world nations, is the lack of those who can provide education and resources to their children having children. So instead, you have old people living longer and longer, hoarding their wealth for themselves and when they die it goes to a few other people who are hoarding their wealth for themsevles.

JM

Jon Miller

sweetlambofgod · Feb 19, 2009

I'd like 3-4, I would like to do international adoption as well

puddleoffaith · Feb 19, 2009

I have no idea. AlthoughI don't have a burning desire to have any children, I'm also young enough that I'm almost positive I eventually will. I also don't have anything against children...it's just not something I have put a lot of thought into.
I'm guessing I'll probably have between 2-3 children, whether adopted or biological.

Mrs. Luther073082 · Feb 19, 2009

Inkabink said:
To those of you who have said "as many as God blesses me with" - are you going to use B.C. at all? If you ended up having one after the other, would you just keep on going, till you passed menopause? I'm just curious.

When I said "as many as God blesses me with" I was thinking more along the lines of if I'm lucky enough to have any biological children. I very highly doubt that I would have the problem of having baby one after another. I've already been taking birth control since 2005 as treatment for PCOS. I will be taking BC after I get married, too, until we are ready to try for kids. Whether that happens or not is up to God and the number I'm able to have will be up to Him, too. If I can't have any of our own then that would make me sad but I'd assume there was some reason God had for that -- and if that was the case then I'd hope that I would be able to be a mother to some children who don't have a mom.

How many kids. . .

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