How do you start loving your enemie?

Just because someone treats me poorly doesn’t mean I must make them an enemy in my mind and heart. I acknowledge the truth and implement the necessary steps to protect myself without taking the leap and allowing negativity to enter.

There are some I keep at arm’s length but I wouldn’t call them enemies. They’re unhealthy or incapable of engaging without harm.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

Honestly, I can't and don't love my enemies either. Sure, that one person who may have acted like a jerk or betrayer but otherwise has good points could still be loved, but I can't love or forgive those who base their whole living on making sure people are the most miserable and most inhumane.

It even sounds like a contradiction to the condemnation of sin.

AK1982 said:

Some actions/reactions/responses required of us by God appears incomprehensible, impossible, illogical, out of scope and unreasonable at times. They indeed are impossible when attempted in the strength and capability of the flesh alone.

Certain commandments require divine intervention/help for us to achieve. When we are wholeheartedly willing to obey his commandments, believe it’s doability “through HIM who strengthens” and have a heart to surrender to His corrections, we will get there. Its hard time taking process of surrender and obedience. But sure we will get there.!!

Reasonability and possibility of some commandments are beyond us to comprehend and very higher than us. Only God can lead us there.

How wonderfully David prayed in Psalms 61 - “lead me to the rock that is higher than I”

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Yeah, I wish it was all more consistent. It is one of the things that keep me skeptical.

Godsangel89 said:

God telling us to bless are enemies feel like he condone the abuse and wants to bless them for it.

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Yes it is. I have trouble with wanting to follow a God's "rules" if his rule sounds like he is condoning the very thing he also said he hates more than anything.

bèlla said:

Just because someone treats me poorly doesn’t mean I must make them an enemy in my mind and heart. I acknowledge the truth and implement the necessary steps to protect myself without taking the leap and allowing negativity to enter.

There are some I keep at arm’s length but I wouldn’t call them enemies. They’re unhealthy or incapable of engaging without harm.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

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Trying to see peoples behavior in context can be useful. Except for the narcissist or psychopath, people seldom freely choose to be adversarial.

I had outlined a process in post#15 as to how one might go about loving ones enemies. You asked this question:

RaymondG said:

How would you apply this strategy in the case of sexual abuse.....especially in the case of a minor.

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I said I wished some time to reflect on my answer. I now offer my apology for an extended delay due entirely to my memory, or rather lack of.

This is a difficult question made more difficult by my lack of direct experience, through self, family or friends, of this problem. I am of the view that such a burden, one of forgiveness, not be placed on a minor. I understand that in these cases the young person often feels a sense of guilt. It seems the process must first involve removal of that guilt, in a sense forgiving and then loving themselves, before any form of reconciliation with the abuser could be contemplated, and that would be best left for adulthood. (That said, I think some children are naturally capable of forgiving, but for them my proposed strategy would be unnecessary.)

For adult subject to sexual abuse I think there are far too many ways in which this could occur to detail how the strategy should be applied, but that it should follow the general outline I gave in post #15.

RaymondG said:

Yes, I find that your advice can be helpful in many situations. The only thing I would change for myself is.....instead of considering whether or not my actions caused them to treat me a certain way......I would consider whether or not I would behave the same as them if I were in their shoes.

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Yes. I quite agree. That was in my mind when I wrote the post, but I see it was only implied and not at all clearly. (Probably I can only see the implication because it was in my mind.)

Godsangel89 said:

It doesnt naturally happen, I feel like its impossible to love someone who abuse you for a long time. We are just little humans we have feelings we are not robots. God wants us to bless are enemies and love them, if i pray to god to bless my enemies and love them i will be lying, I dont like pretending to love someone. I just can't . Animals dont even love their abusers

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Godsangel89,

From my perspective on Scripture, loving those who have chosen to be our enemy doesn't include telling them what they want to hear. But it does include helping them, attempting to understand them, as well as actually providing for their essential needs (e.g. food and clothing, maybe a hug).

And that's where we start when someone else decides to be our enemy.

How does one love a pedophile?

Is this where "tough" love comes in? Do we love the sinner by hate the sin?

Do we remove them from society so that they are not tempted, for their own good?

Tom1961 said:

How does one love a pedophile?

Is this where "tough" love comes in? Do we love the sinner by hate the sin?

Do we remove them from society so that they are not tempted, for their own good?

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That's probably a question best left to the corporate body of The Church, as well as to professional Christian counselors, psychologists and various other legal authorities to handle.

Thankfully, I've never had to face that kind of specific and horrendous situation myself. And where actual abuse is concerned, that situation will have to be handled by people other than the victim(s) and by more than one person of authority. And yes, in that case, I'd think that something like "tough love" would definitely have to come into the picture. How that "though love" will be applied to an abuser will depend upon the extent to which he/she is to be held accountable, and the outcome will likely go beyond simply trying to "loving one's enemy" and beyond simply applying lone passages from the Bible like Galatians 6:1-5 or Matthew 5:43-48.