You've been saved because God had mercy on you.
Honestly, escaping any trauma in which people like you undergo violence, that brings about thoughts of guilt. Why am I saved? Why didn't I go through that? How am I any different?
You're truly not different, at least not in your own thoughts & actions. It's not you. It's God. And it's not capriciousness on His part. If any of us deserved saving, then all of us would, and we might have something to condemn God for. But none of us deserves saving.
In fact we so richly don't deserve it, our guilt feelings, our embarrassment over receiving it -- is richly deserved. But that embarrassment shouldn't be directed at people who also richly deserve it -- and neglect so great a salvation. Many are nice people. But they're not good people. Many treat others kindly -- just not justly. Many have a human level of hygiene, social awareness, love for those around them, and social action. That justification won't even justify their actions in the next century, much less eternity. Look at the past: why will future generations justify us? We haven't affirmed any past generation as just.
God knows this. God judges. We all are guilty -- far more than even we can see simply by looking into the past for some perspective.
We are far worse than we've ever imagined.
And far more loved than we've ever conceived as possible.