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The General Mental Health Forum is now a Read Only Forum. As we had two large areas making it difficult for many to find, we decided to combine the Mental Health & the Recovery sections of the forum into Mental Health & Recovery as a whole. Physical Health still remains as it's own area within the entire Recovery area.
If you are having struggles, need support in a particular area that you aren't finding a specific recovery area forum, you may find the General Struggles forum a great place to post. Any any that is related to emotions, self-esteem, insomnia, anger, relationship dynamics due to mental health and recovery and other issues that don't fit better in another forum would be examples of topics that might go there.
If you have spiritual issues related to a mental health and recovery issue, please use the Recovery Related Spiritual Advice forum. This forum is designed to be like Christian Advice, only for recovery type of issues. Recovery being like a family in many ways, allows us to support one another together. May you be blessed today and each day.
Kristen.NewCreation and FreeinChrist
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Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
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CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
Hi, I've been stalked before by a boyfriend and know the fright involved. I know you weren't stalked but he threatened you and the safety of those around you and you felt you had to lie to everybody to keep them safe.
You don't owe this man anything, and I'm so glad you got out and got out safely. I'm glad your parents are behind you.
Forgive yourself and go forward. What this man does with his life is his life and you are not responsible for it.
I understand why you say you feel guilty, because you keep your true feelings hidden, but you did it to survive. He was manipulative among other things. I'm so glad you have a protective order.
Forgive yourself for God has already forgive you.
God bless you, Tapero
You don't owe this man anything, and I'm so glad you got out and got out safely. I'm glad your parents are behind you.
Forgive yourself and go forward. What this man does with his life is his life and you are not responsible for it.
I understand why you say you feel guilty, because you keep your true feelings hidden, but you did it to survive. He was manipulative among other things. I'm so glad you have a protective order.
Forgive yourself for God has already forgive you.
God bless you, Tapero
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Hi,
I would never face my stalker, never let him get a hold of my number where I live or talk to him in any way. He may be the same dangerous person he was before. He was violent also. I trust it with God; I hold no ill will, I suppose I have forgiven him, just haven't thought about it in a long time, but I hold no grudges, just a fear that he would find me again.
Forgiveness doesn't always mean confronting a person, it's something you do in your heart, it's between you and God. Sometimes you can go to that person but in your case you can't.
God bless you Hon, Tapero
I would never face my stalker, never let him get a hold of my number where I live or talk to him in any way. He may be the same dangerous person he was before. He was violent also. I trust it with God; I hold no ill will, I suppose I have forgiven him, just haven't thought about it in a long time, but I hold no grudges, just a fear that he would find me again.
Forgiveness doesn't always mean confronting a person, it's something you do in your heart, it's between you and God. Sometimes you can go to that person but in your case you can't.
God bless you Hon, Tapero
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Do not involve him, but keep an eye on him and find more support good christian friends for him, and for yourself, cuz right now u r also v weak, so u have no strength to help him at all...
but since he is actually mentally unstable and sick, he needs some more couseling and help. that is important too. but this help must be done by some other elders or even psy doctors i think.
I v been there, u can pm me when u need.
but since he is actually mentally unstable and sick, he needs some more couseling and help. that is important too. but this help must be done by some other elders or even psy doctors i think.
I v been there, u can pm me when u need.
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you absolutely did the right thing and I am proud of you for having the strength to do what you have done.
I'm entirely supportive of a no-contact order.
I recommend you read up on abusers and abuse. It may help you feel better about things. It may also help you be able to prevent yourself from entering into another abusive relationship.
You've done good. really. I'm proud of you. Now take the experience and learn from it.
I'm entirely supportive of a no-contact order.
I recommend you read up on abusers and abuse. It may help you feel better about things. It may also help you be able to prevent yourself from entering into another abusive relationship.
You've done good. really. I'm proud of you. Now take the experience and learn from it.
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BelindaP
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God only uses guilt as a method to bring us to repentance. Any guilt that we feel after that is from the Devil. Our forgiveness is not dependent upon others forgiving us, only on God's grace.
Being in a relationship with this guy for five years has twisted your sense of right and wrong. Instead of wondering what you could do to make things up to him, you should be realizing that he should be the one making up for what he has done to you.
Most of my cousins married men just like him, so I know the type very well. Believe me, he is not as broken up about this as you are. In fact, he probably has already found another woman to victimize, especially if he hasn't taken the time to violate the protection order. Most men like him will do that at least once just to show that they are still in control.
You have made amends to everyone that you need to. If you were to make any kind of overture to him, he would take it as an invitation to try to begin controlling you again. It might also invalidate the protection order that you have in place. That kind of man sees love as weakness, and you don't want to show any kind of weakness toward him.
Accept God's gift of love and forgiveness. When you start to feel guilty rebuke it and say "I am covered by the blood of Jesus. Go away." It sounds silly, but saying it out loud works amazingly well.
Blessings to you, and congratulations on getting out.
Being in a relationship with this guy for five years has twisted your sense of right and wrong. Instead of wondering what you could do to make things up to him, you should be realizing that he should be the one making up for what he has done to you.
Most of my cousins married men just like him, so I know the type very well. Believe me, he is not as broken up about this as you are. In fact, he probably has already found another woman to victimize, especially if he hasn't taken the time to violate the protection order. Most men like him will do that at least once just to show that they are still in control.
You have made amends to everyone that you need to. If you were to make any kind of overture to him, he would take it as an invitation to try to begin controlling you again. It might also invalidate the protection order that you have in place. That kind of man sees love as weakness, and you don't want to show any kind of weakness toward him.
Accept God's gift of love and forgiveness. When you start to feel guilty rebuke it and say "I am covered by the blood of Jesus. Go away." It sounds silly, but saying it out loud works amazingly well.
Blessings to you, and congratulations on getting out.
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BelindaP
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I agree with LittleLambChild. The enemy is trying to deceive you using scripture. In the first passage you cited, the scripture doesn't mean that you can never present your gift if your brother has something against you which he has refused to forgive. Some people are so unforgiving that you would never be able to worship again if that were the case.
And, if you have something against your brother but have chosen to forgive him, you don't need to give him a chance to answer for what he has done. If he is later convicted by the Holy Spirit of what he has done, then he can write you a letter asking forgiveness. It is not your responsibility to seek him out.
With the second scripture, the verse does say to turn the other cheek. As LittleLambChild pointed out, it means to not return evil for evil. Even the Amish (which are the most pacifist Christian sect as far as I know) will escape, if possible. Not turning the other cheek doesn't mean that you stand there and let them kill you.
Finally, the last verse is taken out of context. The entire scriptural passage refers to the forming of cliques within churches, as often happens nowadays. It is an exhortation to greet everyone who visits a church (with peace in their hearts, of course) and not to just hang around with your friends.
Try to keep this in mind. You owe him nothing. He is the debtor in God's eyes. The fact that you have forgiven him is a testament to God's work in your life. It is my fervent belief that you have handled the situation in as godly a manner as possible. Stop beating yourself up and get on with your life.
And, if you have something against your brother but have chosen to forgive him, you don't need to give him a chance to answer for what he has done. If he is later convicted by the Holy Spirit of what he has done, then he can write you a letter asking forgiveness. It is not your responsibility to seek him out.
With the second scripture, the verse does say to turn the other cheek. As LittleLambChild pointed out, it means to not return evil for evil. Even the Amish (which are the most pacifist Christian sect as far as I know) will escape, if possible. Not turning the other cheek doesn't mean that you stand there and let them kill you.
Finally, the last verse is taken out of context. The entire scriptural passage refers to the forming of cliques within churches, as often happens nowadays. It is an exhortation to greet everyone who visits a church (with peace in their hearts, of course) and not to just hang around with your friends.
Try to keep this in mind. You owe him nothing. He is the debtor in God's eyes. The fact that you have forgiven him is a testament to God's work in your life. It is my fervent belief that you have handled the situation in as godly a manner as possible. Stop beating yourself up and get on with your life.
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