Hiding from the world

[CraftyTurtle]

I'm spiralling down. I'm not sad, I'm just disinclined to do anything.
I'm sleeping nearly all the time - sleeping all day instead of going to work. I didn't go to work all last week, or today (Monday).
My intentions of an evening take on a whole new light in the morning.
I can be with my family or friends, but anything beyond that just seems all too difficult.

I just need to suck it up. Please God, give me the courage, or the self-discipline, or whatever it is I need to do the right thing.

 

[mandyangel]

All your power is in God, he will give it to you if you ask him. Its not easy, but it can be done. God bless you! Love, Mandy

 

[quietpraiyze]

Praying that God bathes you in His love and peace and that you receive everything you need. I on the other hand am having one of my sleepless nights. Hey maybe you can throw some of your sleep my way.

 

[LJCTAM]

hey turtle, I am mentally fried to a crisp. I understand your thoughts.

 

[Oaksfan4ever]

Hey Turtle you're in my thoughts & prayers my friend God Bless!!!

 

[CraftyTurtle]

I love all you guys. Thanks be to God for sending you all my way with exactly the right words.

PS I went to work today. It's a start.

 

[singpeace]

I'm spiralling down. I'm not sad, I'm just disinclined to do anything.
I'm sleeping nearly all the time - sleeping all day instead of going to work. I didn't go to work all last week, or today (Monday).
My intentions of an evening take on a whole new light in the morning.
I can be with my family or friends, but anything beyond that just seems all too difficult.

I just need to suck it up. Please God, give me the courage, or the self-discipline, or whatever it is I need to do the right thing.

Father God, I ask that You be with Turtle. Help her to see You; to hear You; to feel You; to know You are near. I give her your Psalm and ask that You bring her out of these horrible shadows and into your perfect Light in Jesus' name. Amen.


Psalm 18
1 I love you, Lord;
you are my strength.
2 The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior;
my God is my rock, in whom I find protection.
He is my shield, the power that saves me,
and my place of safety.

3 I called on the Lord, who is worthy of praise,
and he saved me from my enemies.
4 The ropes of death entangled me;
floods of destruction swept over me.
5 The grave[a] wrapped its ropes around me;
death laid a trap in my path.
6 But in my distress I cried out to the Lord;
yes, I prayed to my God for help.
He heard me from his sanctuary;
my cry to him reached his ears.

7 Then the earth quaked and trembled.
The foundations of the mountains shook;
they quaked because of his anger.
8 Smoke poured from his nostrils;
fierce flames leaped from his mouth.
Glowing coals blazed forth from him.
9 He opened the heavens and came down;
dark storm clouds were beneath his feet.

10 Mounted on a mighty angelic being, he flew,
soaring on the wings of the wind.
11 He shrouded himself in darkness,
veiling his approach with dark rain clouds.
12 Thick clouds shielded the brightness around him
and rained down hail and burning coals.[c]
13 The Lord thundered from heaven;
the voice of the Most High resounded
amid the hail and burning coals.

14 He shot his arrows and scattered his enemies;
his lightning flashed, and they were greatly confused.
15 Then at your command, O Lord,
at the blast of your breath,
the bottom of the sea could be seen,
and the foundations of the earth were laid bare.

16 He reached down from heaven and rescued me;
he drew me out of deep waters.
17 He rescued me from my powerful enemies,
from those who hated me and were too strong for me.
18 They attacked me at a moment when I was in distress,
but the Lord supported me.
19 He led me to a place of safety;
he rescued me because he delights in me.

20 The Lord rewarded me for doing right;
he restored me because of my innocence.
21 For I have kept the ways of the Lord;
I have not turned from my God to follow evil.
22 I have followed all his regulations;
I have never abandoned his decrees.
23 I am blameless before God;
I have kept myself from sin.
24 The Lord rewarded me for doing right.
He has seen my innocence.

25 To the faithful you show yourself faithful;
to those with integrity you show integrity.
26 To the pure you show yourself pure,
but to the wicked you show yourself hostile.
27 You rescue the humble,
but you humiliate the proud.
28 You light a lamp for me.
The Lord, my God, lights up my darkness.

29 In your strength I can crush an army;
with my God I can scale any wall.
30 God’s way is perfect.
All the Lord’s promises prove true.
He is a shield for all who look to him for protection.
31 For who is God except the Lord?
Who but our God is a solid rock?

32 God arms me with strength,
and he makes my way perfect.
33 He makes me as surefooted as a deer,
enabling me to stand on mountain heights.
34 He trains my hands for battle;
he strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow.
35 You have given me your shield of victory.
Your right hand supports me;
your help has made me great.

36 You have made a wide path for my feet
to keep them from slipping.
37 I chased my enemies and caught them;
I did not stop until they were conquered.
38 I struck them down so they could not get up;
they fell beneath my feet.

39 You have armed me with strength for the battle;
you have subdued my enemies under my feet.
40 You placed my foot on their necks.
I have destroyed all who hated me.
41 They called for help, but no one came to their rescue.
They even cried to the Lord, but he refused to answer.
42 I ground them as fine as dust in the wind.
I swept them into the gutter like dirt.

43 You gave me victory over my accusers.
You appointed me ruler over nations;
people I don’t even know now serve me.
44 As soon as they hear of me, they submit;
foreign nations cringe before me.
45 They all lose their courage
and come trembling from their strongholds.
46 The Lord lives! Praise to my Rock!
May the God of my salvation be exalted!

47 He is the God who pays back those who harm me;
he subdues the nations under me
48 and rescues me from my enemies.
You hold me safe beyond the reach of my enemies;
you save me from violent opponents.
49 For this, O Lord, I will praise you among the nations;
I will sing praises to your name.
50 You give great victories to your king;
you show unfailing love to your anointed,
to David and all his descendants forever.

 

[Ludicrus]

OOohhh! I love that Psalm!

 

[Loven God]

Maybe you need some new meds or some changed . This time of the year can be hard to and couse problems like that . Hope you feel better soon and can start going back to work .

 

[Hopes]

I'm spiralling down. I'm not sad, I'm just disinclined to do anything.
I'm sleeping nearly all the time - sleeping all day instead of going to work. I didn't go to work all last week, or today (Monday).
My intentions of an evening take on a whole new light in the morning.
I can be with my family or friends, but anything beyond that just seems all too difficult.

I just need to suck it up. Please God, give me the courage, or the self-discipline, or whatever it is I need to do the right thing.

I am like that. I don't do well with people. Really they don't like me very much. It always seems that I always say the wrong thing, or do the wrong thing, or someone takes something I say or do the wrong way, or something happens. So now its really hard for me to be around people. I pretty much have stayed alone except for my husband and kids for years. I don't know how long, a very long time.

I did take some online classes and one seated class but I am taking a break from that stuff because I am trying to work on healing myself and the stress of college and that together really got to be too much. I got my first B in a class. Missed the A by less than 2 points and I know I could have done better but I just didn't.

Right now I just want to spend my time reading Gods Word and studying that kind of stuff. Plus the college stuff had a lot of stuff I did not agree with and its almost overwhelming. Its like almost all of it ties into something that says God isn't real. I am not sure if I want to go anymore or not. I will decide later.

I am not even sure what I would want to do if I got a degree anyway. I would like to spend my life doing whatever God wants me to do but I don't have a foggy clue what that is.

I thought of art but God has artists and they are much better than me. I thought maybe physics or science but I am not sure I am even smart enough. I thought maybe I could become a nurse and could work a few years to pay off the student loans then maybe become a missionary and help people. I don't know though if they would even let a person like me (bipolar) become a nurse. So guess I don't know what I am supposed to do. I guess I will just wait and see if God has anything He wants from me.