Here's a hypothetical for you

[ukok]

All of this talk of homosexuality/morality lately has got me thinking...(yes that is indeed an event in itself and is worthy of the utmost praise )

If your son or daughter, or loved one was/is gay, and involved in a 'relationship' how would you respond socially to both your loved one and their partner?

To show christian love without condemnation surely we would welcome them and their partner into our home, but how readily would we realistically socialise with them? How willing to share our meals, our home, our lives? Would doing so indicate tolerance? Would not doing so make us guilty of a less than perfect Christian love for others ? What if we weren't just talking about it, but living with it, rubbing shoulders with it?

 

[kimber1]

i just could not in good conscience turn my back on them. no way. i might not agree with what they are doing but i wouldn't stop showing them the love i had for years either.

 

[Dominus Fidelis]

I guess it would be like my relationships with gay people now. I treat them with love, but they have no doubt about my opinions when the subject comes up.

Also, I hope that I would have raised my kids with enough morality to know that homosexual relationships are wrong and that if they were not attracted to the opposite sex, they should be chaste.

 

[geocajun]

If your son or daughter, or loved one was/is gay, and involved in a 'relationship' how would you respond socially to both your loved one and their partner?

with counseling

To show christian love without condemnation surely we would welcome them and their partner into our home, but how readily would we realistically socialise with them? How willing to share our meals, our home, our lives? Would doing so indicate tolerance? Would not doing so make us guilty of a less than perfect Christian love for others ? What if we weren't just talking about it, but living with it, rubbing shoulders with it?

Personally, I would not welcome them into my home - my child would always be welcome of course, but not their "lover".
I do not mind having a gay person at my home who is living chaste, or trying to live chaste, but I would feel like I was actively participating in my childs sins by welcoming their lover in my house.

 

[karla]

Goes back to hate the sin not the sinner. One of my best friends is gay. He was the best man at our wedding (he didn't come out until after that). Was I shocked, no. I kind of had my suspicions, but still he did date girls during college. I guess for me it is that I love him, the fact that he is gay didn't change what kind of friend he is to me. I don't agree with his lifestyle and pray for him daily, but I can't turn my back on him - what kind of christian would I be? We live pretty far apart now, so I don't have the opportunity to go out with him and his boyfriend. I'm not saying that it is easy to accept the facts, but he knows how I feel. He knows that I think that it is immoral and wrong to be doing what he is doing, but he knows that I love him and would never turn my back on him.

 

[Benedicta00]

I would not have them in my house as a “couple” because I could not condone the relationship but I would be there for my son or daughter if they needed me and I would pray, pray and pray. I wouldn't hate the person they were with if they were kind nice people but I couldn't condone what they are doing because it is a sin.

 

[JillLars]

I have kind of a question to add on to this? What if your son or daughter continued to see this person for years, would you ever aknowledge the relationship or would you just pretend it didn't exist?

The reason I ask: A friend of mine has a sister who is a lesbian and has been with the same partner for over 10 years, she has come out to her parents, but they refuse to believe her, and have convinced themselves that the woman she's lived with is just her roommate (and has been for 10 years)

So I guess I'm just wondering what you would do if your son or daughter had no intention of changing?

 

[Benedicta00]

Still Pray. People have free will. there would be little anyone could do other than pray and hope.

 

[Metanoia02]

Ukok,

Thank you asking such a difficult question. There is no easy answer for this. It has to be looked at on a number of different levels.

First, on strictly at the level of sin, this type of activity is no different then if a son or daughter were living in a heterosexual relationship outside of marriage. They are both grave sins and puts their souls at risk. Neither instance can be "tolerated" without that truth being communicated. If we truly love them we will make them aware of the danger thier lifestyle presents. As a parent or friend it is our Christian duty to assist them in any way to avoid the eternal separation from God. Especially in the context of the Sacraments we must not "look the other way". I believe it would be sinful to be involved in anyway of "tolerating' an abuse of the Sacraments. We can not be silent about the grave danger these couples are in.

Secondly, homosexual behavior is "objectively disordered". Not only does it violate the commandment against fornication, but it is violates the very nature in which we were created. While heterosexual relationship are by nature are normal, homosexual relationships viloates the very basis upon which we were created, man and woman. Heterosexual relationships can be remedied by the Sacrament of Matrimony. Homosexual relationship can never be remedied. It points to deeper need for God's grace and sacrafice.

So what to do? Treat them with love. Treat them as you would anyone who lives an objectively and openly grave lifestyle. How would you treat your daughter who would bring over her boyfriend that she lived with outside of marriage? Can we treat a similar relationship that is homosexual any different? I don't think we can. But we must also recognize that the homosexual is in greater need for our prayer and the healing touch of God's grace. There is no remedy beyond living a chaste life.

 

[Bastoune]

I would nevertheless, though I would already have voiced my objection to their lifestyle, invite them both into my home and show love to them. Why? Because while I would be clear of my "disapproval" it is with love and compassion that hearts will be converted. They will not be able to say, "HYPOCRITE! Some 'Christian' he is with his hatemongering bigotry" or whatever inaccurate accusations they would make in their own defense.

No. They would only have the love of Christ in their midst. It would make them think -- this man (me, the "dad") lives and practices what he preaches.

They would see the truth ... "show these men the proof of your love and the reason for our pride in you, so that the churches can see it." (2 Cor. 8:24)

Or better still, "What do you prefer? Shall I come to you with a whip, or in love and with a gentle spirit?" (1 Corinthians 4:21)

 

[GMRELIC]

I would welcome them in my home, and in social settings, I do not think being totally anal to them would be healthful to them, I am a single parent of 2 (one of them deceased) and I would not do anything to cause me to lose that child forever. if some one of the same sex is who she fell in love with then I would have to be supportive of her. I would diffently show Christian Love and compassion on them.

 

[ukok]

GMRELIC,

i appreciate your post and wholeheartedly agree with most of what you said...i hope that i am not out of line in saying how sorry i am for your loss. I can not imagine your pain and i hope that you will not be offended that i would like to pray for you and your family.

 

[GMRELIC]

GMRELIC,

i appreciate your post and wholeheartedly agree with most of what you said...i hope that i am not out of line in saying how sorry i am for your loss. I can not imagine your pain and i hope that you will not be offended that i would like to pray for you and your family.

I would not be offended at all, it is a fairly recent loss, he died 12/28/03
at age 15, my family can use all the prayers we can get, God Bless

 

[ukok]

I would not be offended at all, it is a fairly recent loss, he died 12/28/03
at age 15, my family can use all the prayers we can get, God Bless

Thank you so much, i shall consider it an honour to pray for your family...your pain must feel so raw, i am so sorry that all i can do for you is to pray.

If you ever want someone to talk to feel free to pm me.

God Bless you.