Help myself or help others?

[FrankMCr]

Hello - I am new to Bible Study.
I am in a contradiction and would appreciate comments:
I understand from the Bible that we pray to help others. Commonsense tells me to pray for myself first so that when my own house is in order I am fit to help others. It's no use trying to help people if one's own life is not in good order.
I should follow the Law of God - pray to help others
Commonsense tells me to follow the law of man - first help yourself so that you are then able to help others.
I'm assuming that one should not try to do both at the same time.
If anyone would care to comment I would be most grateful. Thank you. Frank.

 

[LilLamb219]

We pray to God in hopes that our prayers are in line with God's will. (Thy will be done from the Lord's Prayer)

It's okay to pray for things we need and to also pray for others...and it's okay to pray for both at the same time.

 

[FrankMCr]

Thank you.

 

[parsley]

If you are just talking about the order of prayer, you can do both within a few minutes, so don't be fearful about which goes first. Jesus gave us a model for prayer -- start with that, and you will be more "safe."

Matthew 6:9-15 9 In this manner, therefore, pray: Our Father in heaven, Hallowed be Your name. Your kingdom come. Your will be done On earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, As we forgive our debtors.
And do not lead us into temptation, But deliver us from the evil one. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.
14 "For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.


As for non-prayer situations...

Commonsense tells me to follow the law of man - first help yourself so that you are then able to help others. I'm assuming that one should not try to do both at the same time.

You might be surprised. Look at how people react when they are helped -- they want to repay or become friends. When a person is competitive or focused on themselves, however, they drive people away.

Rabbi Daniel Lapin has some good teachings on how this works in business -- meeting the needs of people being a service, and supporting yourself by attending to those needs.

There isn't a Bible formula, but a balance of wisdom that you can gain from reflecting on scriptures. You will see Jesus telling people to give the coat off the back to the enemy, contrasted with prayers for success in a battle where opponents will -- well, you know. If a person is clearly abused, they need to muster strength to get out of the situation, and pray that the abuser sees the error of their ways.

David wrote imprecatory psalms -- ones where he wished evil against his enemies -- but he was in a life-and-death situation, being chased by the king's army through the desert. Jesus turns that mindset around and shows how love can be more powerful than revenge. But Jesus was not a timid passive person, and openly confronted oppressions that He saw. When you defend other people, you end up creating an environment where you are also safer.

 

[Abbot David]

Hello - I am new to Bible Study.
I am in a contradiction and would appreciate comments:
I understand from the Bible that we pray to help others. Commonsense tells me to pray for myself first so that when my own house is in order I am fit to help others. It's no use trying to help people if one's own life is not in good order.
I should follow the Law of God - pray to help others
Commonsense tells me to follow the law of man - first help yourself so that you are then able to help others.
I'm assuming that one should not try to do both at the same time.
If anyone would care to comment I would be most grateful. Thank you. Frank.

Brother Frank,

One of the area's, that I've experienced and believe, that we grow in our faith is when we decrease so that He may increase. (John 3:30)

Our Lord tell's us to die to self. (Matt 16:24)

But we are also encouraged to pray for our own needs. (Matt 21:22)

So I believe that as we grow in the Lord, our supplications (praying for our own needs) start to grow less important as we get more comfortable in being content with where we're at; where God has called us to be and our intercessions (praying for the needs of others) start to grow more as we grow more comfortable with the giving of ourselves to others. (Matt 20:28)

But of course this is a process that we have to grow into and cultivate.

 

[parsley]

our supplications (praying for our own needs) start to grow less important as we get more comfortable in being content with where we're at; where God has called us to be and our intercessions (praying for the needs of others) start to grow more as we grow more comfortable with the giving of ourselves to others. (Matt 20:28)

Yes, we tend to have a lot of ideals for our lives. We get jealous when we see others arrive at certain points, and put ourselves on a treadmill of never being good enough. But after years go by and we see how God has sustained us just fine without having everything, it is embarrassing to see our initial demands.

We don't need everything we imagine we need. I am a preparer, and like to get supplies for things before I start working. When I had kids, I started collecting craft supplies because my childhood family did so much with crafts. Well, what do you know, my kids grew up in the computer age and did not like crafts. What I thought I'd need became a burden -- the collection took up storage space, mind space, and needed maintenance.

Many things in life work this way. What we think is needed to help ourselves, does not keep us light on our feet.

 

[TheGuide]

Hello - I am new to Bible Study.
I am in a contradiction and would appreciate comments:
I understand from the Bible that we pray to help others. Commonsense tells me to pray for myself first so that when my own house is in order I am fit to help others. It's no use trying to help people if one's own life is not in good order.
I should follow the Law of God - pray to help others
Commonsense tells me to follow the law of man - first help yourself so that you are then able to help others.
I'm assuming that one should not try to do both at the same time.
If anyone would care to comment I would be most grateful. Thank you. Frank.

To thy self be true. Then help others.

 

[Bible2]

parsley said in post #4:

But after years go by and we see how God has sustained us just fine without having everything . . .

"And he said unto them, When I sent you without purse, and scrip, and shoes, lacked ye any thing? And they said, Nothing" (Lk. 22:35).

"Godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. And having food and raiment let us be therewith content. But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. But thou, O man of God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness. Fight the good fight of faith, lay hold on eternal life, whereunto thou art also called, and hast professed a good profession before many witnesses" (1 Tim. 6:6-12).

We don't need everything we imagine we need.

"And he said unto them, Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a man's life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth" (Lk. 12:15).

 

[FrankMCr]

Hello All
Well, that has given me some food for thought. Thank you so much for your replies.
regards
Frank