Hello

[Joseph Reyes]

I would like some help please with lust. I want to change my life, and need help. I already have Jesus, I just need help from someone who knows what they are doing. LOL. Please though. Help me, someone!

 

[Joe 73]

If you have an addiction to masturbation or pornography, I have experience with that. It took coming to a point where I absolutely hated the double life I was living, and I realized It was causing me to see people as sexual objects(I also have been dealing with ssa secretly and I realized this increased that), and messing up friendships.
As a catholic, I was put into a situation were I went to mass often, and worse, I was recieving communion in the knoweladge of grave sin. I hated this. But it was also a blessing, because it pushed me to turn away from sin. The first thing I had to do was get the courage to go to confession. I prayed the rosary for Mary's intercession, I was desperate. And then it happened. I went to mass, and I was brave enough to stand behind in the pew during communion, and then there was confession after mass, and I decided to confess it all. I was amazed, because a few weeks before I was cowering in fear at the thought of it. Being with God at church so often, made it difficult to sin.

You need a strong commitment to ending these sinful habbits. Here are some tips though. If you have a pornography problem, pray everytime you get on the computer, and make sure there is a specific reason you are on it. and then get off. you don't want to wander around on the internet if you are easily tempted. Put a cross on your computer login screen as a reminder to be pure on the computer. This one is hard to beat, but for me it was much easier to stop then masturbation.

Masturbation is harder to stop, and it has a similar effect even without porn, you are still using your imagination for sexual images. This one took me a while. I would pray everytime I entered the bathroom. In this area you want to watch out for little temptations. they can fool you. Like "I just want to be comfortable looking at my own body" (with same sex attractions this was harder because I had been lusting after the male body), but they are just a pretense that will suck you down. get out of those situations as soon as you can.

Avoid falling into these pitfalls when you have sinned, just repent.

I might as well sin again, I already have.
God can never forgive me this time.

And two final bits of advice I learned in overcoming masturbation

A preist told me this in confession.
When you are faced with a sexual temptation, don't obsess over it like "WHY DO I KEEP THINKING THIS?!" That will frustrate you and make it easy to give in. instead focus on God's ideas, I am called to love in God's design for sexuality, I have dignity, I trust God, He will lead me to happiness ect. Have a little speech about that you can turn to when you need to distract yourself from a sexual temptation.

there is a website called no fap which is for people trying to stop masturbating and stuff. you can read stories about people quitting.
I also found the first couple weeks are the hardest to get through(towards the end your brain freaks out), Knowing that makes it easier to get through. There is a temporary relapse, where when you break the addiction, it can cause depression, and practically no sexual arousal. this scares some people, but you have to pull through it.
Once I made a month, I didn't go back. Its starting that's hard, but once you form a habbit, you don't want to go back.
It took about 4 months of firm resolution to quit both porn and masturbation. porn took a few weeks.

One more thing. all the sexual pleasure you get from habbits like these can distract from problems in your life. So sometimes you will quit, and still be depressed for other reasons.


Pray for help, God looks with compassion.

Joe