Hello everyone,
The funeral was Sunday. It was a moving ceremony. I read my prepared
eulogy and did alright. Geri and Emily (his mom and sister) and I
walked out behind the casket arm-in arm. Holden did so well as a
pallbearer. It was heartwrenching to see him trying to be brave and
fight back his tears. He did a great job.
At the burial, the mourners were the ones to fill in the dirt--tucking
him in for the last time--as the rabbi said. It was very comforting to
me to be there at the end. David and I stayed until the grave was
filled. All of us helped to fill it--from Francisco up to my parents.
There were so many people there to mourn him. It is so sad that he was
loved by so many, yet he probably didn't consider any of us during the
last few hours of his life.
My mind is still whirling. I am angry at the waste of his life, his
lack of judgment, his selfishness, the drug culture. I am sad beyond
words. My heart hurts so much. I cannot believe that I have had to
say good-bye to him twice in his short lifetime. At least he is safe.
That is very comforting. But the hole in my heart is real and it will
never fully close.
Thank you for all your prayers and support. It really means a lot to
me. I hope that I can love, guide and pray for my children more than
ever. I hope they will learn from Eric's short life that this world is
fleeting. That working hard, feeling pain sometimes are necessary.
That drugs do not help you escape from the pains of this world--quite
the opposite.
I love you all.
Peg/Margaret
