He went from cheating to idk to not talking....

[PenguinLover]

Hi, i am feeling so down in the dumps and just plain hurt i needed to vent or something. Since getting married i feel more alone than ever. my husband went away with the militarty to base for training and has been cheating on me ever since.
I am tried everything from i will come up to live while your in traing and we can work it out called cried and basically begged for months for things to get better. he basically fell out of love for me and wouldnt admit to the affari or anything. i have proof especially where she is my step cousin..... so he has cut off all contact and is continually putting me in debt, im seeing a laywer shortly and i just cry all the time. like how could i not see that he didnt really love me, why did he marry me , why why why
i am so hurt and lonely and just plain angry all the time. i cant go back to school bc he makes too much, i cant afford to live on my own , so i am living at home with my parents, i have lost money possesions, friedns and family over this. i feel so broken. i was feeling better for a the past few weeks, had a friend i was close to helping me alot , and all he was using me too, well tried too for sex, so when that was a no i am here hurt again. i dont know what wring with me and why i attract men who are no good and hurtfull, all i want to do is live a christian life, have a good husband, have chldren and live for God. why is it so hard, and painfull? i am trying to cope with all this pain and i cant. i pray and i try to read my bible every day, go to church and i have no christian friends and i feel uttlery alone. i see my husband having fun , with erh , they are together now on fb even though hes still married to me, he telles me i did nothing wrong , ithat there is nothing to go to counselling for he just doesnt feel the same about me anymore etc.. i dont care , i ment what i said when we were married, i love the man i married not what he is now and i am forced to get a divorece, forced to lost everything i have, forced to be at rock bottom in my life and i hurts so much. i know i have God but he isnt here with me in the flesh u know, it hurts , crying to much now to even type anymore..

 

[JaneFW]

I'm sorry that you are so hurt.

I agree with your husband that you need to cut the ties, and cut them fast. Sit down with the lawyer, get this marriage annulled, and then start your life over again. You are still young, and you will heal. I know it seems impossible, but you really will. When you are divorced, the school situation should change, because it won't matter how much your husband makes. You will be single again. Become single-minded - and keep your mind on obtaining a good degree, and setting out again into the world, as an accomplished young woman who had a horrible experience, but learned from it. That doesn't mean become cynical but, right now, you are obviously very very vulnerable, and there is nothing wrong with that - it doesn't make you wrong or bad, it's just how it is. Obviously you have met some bad men, but there are good men out there too. I just would focus on you for now, and your relationship with God. Keep men at arm's length, embrace your female friends, and just move on the best that you can.

I am so very very sorry for what you have experienced in this marriage. Sadly, you met and you married a jerk. You didn't know that. It's not your fault. I keep on saying this over and over because I hope it is sinking in! People who have been treated poorly by their spouse often belabor themselves for choosing so badly, when in fact it wasn't your choice that was at fault, it was the behavior of the person you chose. I hope that you can "hear" that.

 

[PenguinLover]

Thanks. Sometimes the sadness of it all get to be too much. I am keeping men at arms length, I just think I trust too easy and I wish i didn't. I also wish I wasn't so soft-hearted. I take a lot of things very personal. Where i have had to move because of all of this I dont have any female friends close. Feeling hurt and lonely all the time is exhausting. I just dont know how too handel it.

 

[SteveNZ]

WOW ..... If I could I would give you a hug (..I'm a guy and it is out of place..) I would and say it is OK Jesus loves you.

Please do learn to cry things out and renew your life. And pray like you have never prayed before.

Jesus cares for you and thinks you are neat! Your partner choose you because you were wonderful so do believe it. (* What a twit..) The Lord really is your shepherd and loves you.

May Jesus be with you on this journey ahead. And may you smile so well again that we all need sunglasses to talk to you..