Having flashbacks and terror

[RuthD]

I am a sexual assault survivor. I was raped many times and molested and raped as a child. People spread it arounf that I was a harlot when I was really raped. This made me feel so ashamed and hated. All of thes feelings have come back now that I've been getting obscene phone calls telling me what I did when I was raped and what they want to do to me. I have changed my phone number a few minutes ago but I feel petrified they will find me and hurt me again. I'm having flashbacks, have PTSD, and feel almost paralyzed. I could use feedback and prayers please. Thank you.

 

[Darkhorse]

I'm so sorry to hear this! You have been a solid rock for so many people here, and I would hope you could have peace from your torment.

May I suggest you get caller ID and don't answer the phone unless it's a number you know? That's what I do. People I know are entered in my phone and their name shows up when they call; strangers have to leave a message, and I can call them back.

And you don't have to listen to an entire message from the wrong person...

Praying for you...

 

[paul1149]

May I suggest you get caller ID and don't answer the phone unless it's a number you know?

Also, Google Voice, which is a VOIP service (and so far has been free), gives you all kinds of control. You can block callers, send them automatically to spam, etc.

 

[RuthD]

Thank you. He sounded so creepy and asked if I give good h***. He also said he wanted to lick my thighs. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

 

[Tomyris]

I am a sexual assault survivor. I was raped many times and molested and raped as a child. People spread it arounf that I was a harlot when I was really raped. This made me feel so ashamed and hated. All of thes feelings have come back now that I've been getting obscene phone calls telling me what I did when I was raped and what they want to do to me. I have changed my phone number a few minutes ago but I feel petrified they will find me and hurt me again. I'm having flashbacks, have PTSD, and feel almost paralyzed. I could use feedback and prayers please. Thank you.

Do you have a friend you can stay with overnight? Someone you can cry on for a long time?

There is actually a lot of good advice on this forum, a lot given by you that it might be good for you to read.

But more than that, sometimes the best thing to do when you are under attack is to turn your attention away from it, look God in the face and focus on Him through prayer, praise and worship. Think about what He did for you on the cross. He bore all your pain and carried your sorrow, and on your behalf He was stricken. Let Him get big in your mind and spirit and emotions, let Him be magnified, and to some extent this stuff will be diminished. Look at it as a call to worship. That really annoys the devil.

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I am glad you changed your number! I sure hope they stop! Hope you are able to feel safe and calm soon! I know I had flashbacks the other night and they are not fun. Will keep you in my prayers. If you need to talk my PM box is always open

 

[RuthD]

Thank you all for your ideas and prayers. I am still waiting for the number to be changed. I thought it would change early this morning. What really scared me to no end is that the guy calling said he heard bad things about me from others. I won't say what he heard. But I don't know if he is just a random pervert who just by random called my number or if someone I know gave him my number. The last time he called I told him that I had called the police on him even though I had not. I haven't had a call from him today.

 

[handheldoutlaw]

Hey honey. I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling, I hope everything turns out okay and that the number is changed soon. I am praying.

 

[Tomyris]

The last time he called I told him that I had called the police on him even though I had not.

If you have not called the police, you need to, for three reasons. The first is honesty. The second is that he may figure out that you did not call the police because certain things did not happen, and decide that you had a reason you did not call the police, a reason perhaps that would indicate that you would never call the police, which makes you a bigger target.

The third is that if something happens, you will tell the police that you told him this, and they will wonder about your credibility and what you may be hiding, and they may start looking at you. It would no longer be a simple assault, or whatever, because they will think you are playing games. On the other hand, if you call the police, you may get all kinds of wonderful help and instructions on handling this and other creeps. Police departments vary. You may get a good one.

I would NOT stay on the line and take his KFC order. That is local slang for he wants an order of breasts and thighs, meaning yours. Get a phone with caller id and do not answer any number you do not already know. The instant you hear heavy breathing or recognize his voice, hang up. Some guys get their buzz off your reaction. Don't give it to him. "Do not feed the troll." Do not dialog. Hang up. The police may give you different instructions if they decide to trace your line for you and get the guy, but let them tell you that.

You might consider getting a nice, big, friendly dog, like a German shepherd or a doberman, that is very protective of its owner and rather hostile to anyone it thinks is hostile to said owner. Most men have second thoughts about messing with an animal that appears ready to tear his throat out.

 

[RuthD]

I am just another human being made of flesh and bone, not stone. My number is changed now.

 

[Tomyris]

I am just another human being made of flesh and bone, not stone.

We all are but dust and can do so little. Sometimes all we have is the community of our mutual weakness before God, so that He can fill our emptiness. He emptied Himself that He could fill us with Himself. He exalts the humble, He heals the sick, He mends the brokenhearted, while the proud and the healthy and those who never seem to feel pain or anguish get bypassed. He is our all in all, and those moments of feeling like you are nothing are like a pause in a musical number, a stillness right before the trumpets sound and the cymbals crash, and we are swept away into the eternal music.

 

[RuthD]

Thank you for your messages to me. I am feeling a lot better since my number was changed. I don't regret not calling the police because I have done so before years ago and nothing was done. I have caller id and it said private caller when he called. Any way he is gone from bothering me and I think I know where he got my number and that person will never get my number again.

 

[Home]

Thank you for your messages to me. I am feeling a lot better since my number was changed. I don't regret not calling the police because I have done so before years ago and nothing was done. I have caller id and it said private caller when he called. Any way he is gone from bothering me and I think I know where he got my number and that person will never get my number again.

I am glad you get out of the bad situation and I hope you could enjoy yourself all the days ahead.

 

[RuthD]

Thank you. I feel safe in my own apt. again. I feel sorry for others he may be calling. May God help them all.

 

[lutheran87]

I will pray for you.
God bless

 

[artqween]

I am a sexual assault survivor. I was raped many times and molested and raped as a child. People spread it arounf that I was a harlot when I was really raped. This made me feel so ashamed and hated. All of thes feelings have come back now that I've been getting obscene phone calls telling me what I did when I was raped and what they want to do to me. I have changed my phone number a few minutes ago but I feel petrified they will find me and hurt me again. I'm having flashbacks, have PTSD, and feel almost paralyzed. I could use feedback and prayers please. Thank you.

RuthD.. have told ur family about
This? u did report this rape right?
u r getting from ur family and family
Dr.?? U can sign up for disability for
This with ur dr.s note with ur family.
Awww bless ur heart... Tear tear..
We r rootn for ya sis...

 

[artqween]

Thank you. I feel safe in my own apt. again. I feel sorry for others he may be calling. May God help them all.

I hope they beefed up security/..?
Ur family is around u more? did it
Happen there? have u and ur family
discussed this matter with ur apt.
Manager? What do they say??

 

[artqween]

I am a sexual assault survivor. I was raped many times and molested and raped as a child. People spread it arounf that I was a harlot when I was really raped. This made me feel so ashamed and hated. All of thes feelings have come back now that I've been getting obscene phone calls telling me what I did when I was raped and what they want to do to me. I have changed my phone number a few minutes ago but I feel petrified they will find me and hurt me again. I'm having flashbacks, have PTSD, and feel almost paralyzed. I could use feedback and prayers please. Thank you.

I hate to say this.. All these flashbacks r a good sign.. U can heal.
The more u talk about it. Possibly
At ur local church. Write a book
About ur experience. From ur prespective. In detail. Keeping in
U arent the only one.. Women gets
Raped often. U would be helping
A lot women and men.. They too
Get raped as well. However not much is ever done about it unfort.ly. With
These flashbacks u can turn it
Around.. possibly. Healing and helping,... . this is sort of a silent
Crime. :-(....

 

[artqween]

I am glad you get out of the bad situation and I hope you could enjoy yourself all the days ahead.

Have u seen him? Do u know him?

 

[HisSparkPlug]

I am a sexual assault survivor. I was raped many times and molested and raped as a child. People spread it arounf that I was a harlot when I was really raped. This made me feel so ashamed and hated. All of thes feelings have come back now that I've been getting obscene phone calls telling me what I did when I was raped and what they want to do to me. I have changed my phone number a few minutes ago but I feel petrified they will find me and hurt me again. I'm having flashbacks, have PTSD, and feel almost paralyzed. I could use feedback and prayers please. Thank you.

<staff edit> this makes me so ANGRY!! I am so sorry for you going thru this!!
The Lord currently has me in hiding b/c last year I discovered I was r*ped and abused by a group of neighbour men -- when I told my family they said I'm lying and that I made it up. The men know I've remembered and they will kill me if they can so God told me to run and He will look after me. It's been horribly hard and I've never cried so much in my life or felt so alone and abandoned.
It is hard for me to read about these things. I've a LOT of memory recall to get thru and I must do it alone... but at least no one can find me or harrass me me as they are doing to you. I hope you are safe now and have support.